


Bruises

by wayfmuke98



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Bottom Luke, Bruises, Happy Ending, Loss of Trust, Luke Has Trust Issues, Luke Hemmings - Freeform, M/M, Michael Clifford - Freeform, Protective Michael, Sad, Slight sexual assault, Smut, Top Michael, Trust Issues, drawer!michael
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:42:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 62
Words: 73,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25213360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wayfmuke98/pseuds/wayfmuke98
Summary: Michael’s spent his whole life living in the dark, surrounded by the negative emotions he’s grown used to. But now there’s a new boy across the road who makes him feel something he’s never felt blandness he hates it.But Michael doesn't hate the pretty, blue eyed boy. The boy who loves planting flowers, playing guitar and has purple bruises on his skin.This story is also on wattpad. Find me as wayfmuke98
Relationships: Calum Hood/Ashton Irwin, Luke Hemmings/Original Character(s), Michael Clifford/Luke Hemmings
Comments: 20
Kudos: 22





	1. Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted to let my readers know that this is in no way me romanticising an abusive relationship. I wrote this story because I wanted to and the ending that Michael and Luke have is not always what happens in real life. 
> 
> Stay safe, take care and always choose love.

Michael has always been kinda fucked up. With his dyed hair, dark clothes, bad habits. His life was kinda fucked up too. He was used to living like a dead man. He was content.

Living a life like his meant he had to be used to it, if he wasn't? Then tough, there was no room for anything else. He liked the dark, he lived in dark, he was used to the dark.

Michael was sure he hadn't ever felt the happiness he saw around. But he didn't seem to mind. Why would he? Life in the shadows hid him away from many things, he didn't know how intoxicating happiness could be. Better than any drug he could use.

There was only one thing he knew and that one thing was all he needed to know.

Happiness was deadly. Because once you had it, it could easily be taken away.

And Michael had seen that happen a lot.

***

You could say Luke is like a glass doll. Too timid and frightened to get to know the world after what had happened to him. He was easily played with and easily thrown away. Because like a doll everyone was attracted to his light eyes, fair skin and soft hair. But Luke knew their was evil in this world, he had learned that when he was left lying there forced to fix his broken pieces.

He knew what had happened was wrong yet he still allowed himself to be owned. He still allowed the same person to shatter all the same pieces into smaller ones, making the wounds on his heart deeper.

Despite everything, Luke still believed he was happy or tried to. He had always been a bit stupid and he knew that. Luke knew that there was no one at the end of the tunnel waiting to save him from his hell but he still let himself believe there was.

Because hope was important. Hope is the only thing stronger than fear. And Luke held a lot of fear in his delicate heart.


	2. Fresh Start

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I do not own any of the characters. I only own the plot line and context of the book. This book can also be found on wattpad under the same user. It is my own work. Enjoy!

It was dark out. Just how Michael liked it. He threw the cigarette onto the ground watching the last swirl of smoke disappear for good. He leaned against his door sighing deeply. He felt warm on the inside but that feeling would soon fade away.

It was cold tonight. And Michael wished he had something warmer on but there was nothing he could do now. His eye caught the light coming from the house across the street. There was a moving van outside and Michael frowned. The house had recently been empty but now there were people moving in and Michael wasn't fond of people. Except for Calum, he was just about bearable.

Michael walked towards his car and got in. There was nothing to do, why not get drunk, he thought, he hasn't let loose in ages. He started up his car and saw two people get out of another one. It was a decent blue car but Michael cringed. He didn't like blue, too bright and there was too much of it in the sky. He liked black. It was dark and secretive, just like him.

He drove carelessly towards the pub not bothering about how he'd get back home drunk. Michael was one for risks. He had been through enough shit to not make him fear anything anymore, if he died, he died. He wouldn't be missed (maybe Calum would miss him) but he surely wouldn't miss the world. Maybe him leaving could be a good thing, there was too much darkness in the world and a slight absence would always be better.

Everyone liked the light more.

Michael knew he would too- if he could feel -but he forced himself not to. Feelings were dangerous. Michael danced thinly on the line of danger in every aspect because he liked the thrill. It was the only time his dead heart felt alive. Feelings only made him more numb because all the people he loved had left. Who's to say that wouldn't happen again?

He didn't want to hurt himself for something as stupid as emotions.

***

The night air was cool and Luke was ecstatic. This was his fresh start. A new beginning and another goodbye. He had promised that things would change and Luke hoped they would. All he had to do was be good, listen to everything he was told to do and make him happy.

When Alexander was happy, Luke could be happy. It had always been like that, Luke hadn't known any different.

Luke wasn't just happy about his fresh start, he was happy that they had moved closer to Ashton. Of course Alexander didn't know but this was great for the younger boy. He couldn't visit Ash, Luke had never been allowed to do that but now that they were closer, Ash could visit more.

Everything was in place except for a few boxes which Luke was going to start unpacking tomorrow. He didn't know where Alex was but he didn't mind. Alex was out late most of the time but still managed to come home in one piece. Luke decided to heat up the food he had made earlier for their dinner. He set up the table and filled the water glasses just in time to hear the door slam shut. He slightly tensed but carried on his duties.

He didn't want anything to go wrong tonight, or ever.

"Baby?"

Luke let out a breath of relief, upon seeing his boyfriend. He was slightly drunk but he was smiling at him and that made Luke happy.

"Hi." Luke said quietly and Alex sat down at the table smiling.

"What's for dinner?" He asked and Luke told him as he placed the dish on the table.

It was Alex's favourite and Luke loved seeing him smile. The boy plated the food up and they ate in silence. Luke didn't mind though, the silence was soothing.

As soon as Alex finished, Luke put down his cutlery and took both plates to the kitchen not bothering to finish his food. He then came back for the water glasses.

Whilst Luke was washing up he felt arms wrap around his waist and he couldn't help but smile. 

"Thank you baby, that was delicious."

Luke leaned back into his embrace and smiled, he loved when Alex was like this.

"You don't have to thank me. I like making you happy." Luke said quietly.

He heard Alex hum and felt him place a kiss on his jaw before exploring his neck. The blonde sighed softly and felt harsh hands on his waist.

"Come upstairs baby." Alex mumbled and Luke knew what was gonna happen. Truthfully, Luke didn't want to. All the unpacking of boxes had gotten him tired and he just wanted to collapse in bed and sleep but he also knew it would make Alex mad if he said no. He couldn't remember the last time they had lovingly had sex instead of it being forced so Luke knew better than to decline his offer.

"Okay. I'm coming." He said quietly, following after his boyfriend.

The blond lay in bed, cold. Alex had collapsed beside him but Luke couldn't sleep. Before, they used to cuddle after sex but now they didn't. Luke hoped he would feel all the old feelings again but this time, like always, it felt forced. Luke didn't enjoy himself or feel loved.

All Luke wanted was to love someone and be loved back, how hard could that be?

He sighed and got up, pulling on his some boxers before going to switch off the lights. He looked outside and noticed someone. 

The person was stumbling towards his house and turned around. It looked like he was shouting at someone else. Both strangers were standing under the streetlight and Luke could see them clearly. One was pale as paper and the other looked Asian. Both looked drunk and were laughing now.

Luke wished he could be out living his life and stumbling back home at two, drunk and laughing his head off with Ashton.

But Luke's wishes never came true.


	3. New Neighbours

Sunlight streamed in through the windows and Michael groaned. He hated life right now. He had a splitting headache and the sun was too harsh on his eyes. Michael forced himself out of bed and harshly pulled the curtains to shield the light. He reached into his bedside cabinet and congratulated himself for remembering to fill up on pain killers.

Stumbling down the stairs, he took the pills with a glass of water. Deciding it was too early for this, he fell back onto his couch and went back to sleep in an instance.

The next time Michael woke up it was four in the afternoon. He moaned lowly at the slight pressure on his head and gnawing in his stomach. Michael tugged off his black t-shirt and went to look for something to eat. He decided on a bowl of cereal before going back upstairs to shower.

He showered quickly and stepped out of the steamy room to get his clothes. Suddenly his mobile started to ring and he groaned as he looked for it. Finally spotting it, he answered the call; the familiar voice of his best friend was heard.

"Can I come round yours to play a video game?" Calum asked and Michael was about to decline but Calum spoke again. "I'm coming in 10." Then the line disconnected.

Michael shrugged at the news and put on some joggers and a sweatshirt before running down.

True to his word, Calum arrived in 10 minutes.

"Did you see the guy that left your neighbours house?" Calum enquired and Michael shook his head confused.

"Jesus Christ he's hot." Calum said and sat himself down on a bean bag. Michael rolled his eyes.

"I haven't even seen my neighbours."

"Well you should. He's got these sexy, gold curls. He wears a bandana maybe to keep the curls away or whatever but fuck it's hot. And he's got muscles, mate. He better come round often." Calum said nonchalantly whilst Michael glared.

"You're not coming to my house every time this hot guy comes out." 

Calum pouted at this and Michael sighed pulling out a cigarette. Sometimes Michael didn't even understand their friendship. Calum and Michael worked but they were different. 

Calum liked making friends, partying, eating (a lot), dating and he had a happy life. He loved his friends- even if he had only one -who was Michael if you hadn't known.

But Calum also liked video games and he guessed that was great because Michael did too. Calum had helped Michael one time when he was drunk and lost, guess he decided to stick around. But Michael didn't complain, he didn't like being lonely all the time. Even if he looked like the type who did.

Michael and Calum played a few more rounds and decided to order a pizza because it was nearing seven and both were hungry. Michael had no idea why Calum was hungry, half of the cupboards had been emptied out on the floor beside him. He mentally made a reminder to go grocery shopping soon.

There was a ring and Michael didn't budge.

"Mate go get it, it's your house." Calum said and Michael shrugged. 

"You do it." 

"No, I'm tired. Hurry up Michael, I'm hungry."

"How are you hungry?" Michael exclaimed, "You've nearly eaten everything you donkey."

Calum blushed slightly at this and Michael knew he won the argument when the tanned boy stood up. The doorbell rang again and Calum scowled muttering to himself. Michael laughed at that.

It took a while but soon his best friend re-appeared with a smile and Michael was confused.

"What did that to you?" He asked opening the box of food.

"You mean who did that." He said grinning widely and Michael shook his head not wanting to know.

"Flirting with the pizza guy, great." He mumbled and Calum shook his head appalled.

"Ashton was there!" He exclaimed and Michaels brows furrowed in confusion. 

"Who's that? What a shit name."

"It's the hot guy from earlier- and his name isn't shit." 

Michael didn't even try protesting against Calum and just carried on eating his pizza.

"I think he's already dating someone." Calum said sadly, "His arm was around this tall boy with blond hair and he's way better than me already." 

Michael frankly didn't give a shit.

"What do I do?" Calum wailed throwing his pizza back in the box. 

Michael groaned at his antics, "How do you know they're not friends or something?" He said mouth full of pizza.

Calum whined. "His arm was around him." 

"I put my arm around you all the time." Michael said making Calum glare. 

"You never do that. And anyway they kissed."

Michael eyes popped out, "Well obviously they're together then, if they kissed you idiot."

"Hey! It was on the head so I thought I had a chance. The blondie was all small and hugging him and I hate him Michael."

Michael rolled his eyes and stood up with the box, "I need air."

He walked outside and threw the pizza box into his half empty bin before leaning against the fence. He took a breath relishing the cold air on his skin and his tongue when he spotted someone.

The person was hunched on the ground outside and they were trembling. Michael could see it clearly since the boy was sitting directly under a light. All he could see was blond hair and big clothes, his feet stuffed into dirty converses.

Michael never liked being sad. Or seeing sad people, that's why he never did things that could make him sad. 

He stayed leaning against the fence for a while watching but the boy stayed in his spot and soon Michael got bored and went inside. 

Maybe someone in his family died, he thought.


	4. First Encounter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How often should I update? If you have a wattpad account, follow me! Please keep in mind that some errors may occur through the book. I’m not the best.

"What?!" Michael hissed into his phone.

Today was not going well. He had forgotten to set off his alarm so instead of having a lie in, his goddamn alarm was blaring on the other side of the room. He was forced to turn it off but when he crawled back in bed he couldn't go back to sleep. He decided to go down and eat but of course there was nothing for breakfast, courtesy to Calum. He lazed on his sofa bored until he decided to just go and get the shopping done. But of course he forgot to tie his laces and he slipped, banging his head on the door knob.

And now, Michael was walking down the frozen isle with no coat or jumper on. He was freezing and was positive that it had started to rain outside.

"Stop being an ass." Calum grumbled through the phone and Michael groaned pushing his trolley further. "What the fuck do you want Cal?"

"It's Monday." Cal said simply and Michael frowned. Monday? Oh. 

"Right, sorry. Do you need me round?" Michael asked and Calum sighed. "No, he should leave soon."

Michael nodded and carried on his shop. "Can I call you after? I'm kinda busy." And Calum hummed letting him know it was okay.

He was nearly finished his shop and couldn't wait to go home. Put his feet up and relax for a bit before going round to check on the Asian looking but not Asian boy.

Michael was queuing up at the till when suddenly a cart bashed into him making him groan. Angrily, he turned around. 

"Watch where the fuck you're going!" He snapped and noticed a thin boy. He looked strangely familiar to the boy he saw yesterday. 

The boy trembled in his oversized hoodie. It wasn't meant to be oversized, Michael could tell. The boy was insanely skinny and tall. "I-I'm sorry. Was just in a rush."

Michael rolled his eyes at the pathetic excuse, "Yeah, we all are mate." He said rudely and the blond boy cowered away. It was irritating to Michael how small he was and how scared he was acting so he turned around not wanting to look at the boy anymore. He pushed his trolley further in the queue until it was his turn and he thanked god that the cashier was good and quick at packing bags. Michael didn't want to be here longer than he needed. Once he payed he walked out, grimacing at the rain.

He had nearly packed everything into his car when he noticed the boy from earlier. He was struggling with the heavy bags that Michael could see through. There was beer, lots of it and a few other things. He didn't seem like the type to drink Michael thought but he had learned that some people weren't what they seemed. Shrugging it off he felt kinda bad for the boy. He was walking alone in the cold rain.

Michael would have offered him a lift home but Michael wasn't that kind of person so he drove on. Headlights brightly shining ahead, leading him home.

***

It was time to meet Calum. Michael tugged on a beanie before slipping into his shoes and closed the door. He frowned when he saw the same boy from earlier. What was he doing here?

Michael crossed the street and tapped the skinny boys shoulder. "Were you following me?"

The boy hastily looked up, his eyes widening. So did Michael's. "What happened?" He asked worry seeping into his voice.

Michael never worried about anyone. Ever. So he hated this.

He coughed and frowned, changing his tone of voice so it grew cold again, "Hello?"

The younger boy cowered away, his body closing into himself as he shuffled back. "I'm fine." He muttered, his wet, blond hair covering his pretty eyes.

Michael studied the pale boy. His lips were red and slightly bleeding from a gash and there was an angry bruise on his eyes. It wasn't a lot for Michael to handle but for the boy in front of him it was clear that he was in pain. 

Michael crouched down admiring the pretty blue eyes in front of him. Michael had never seen such blue eyes in his life, he was drowning in them. 

"Did you get in a fight?" Michael asked and the fragile blue eyed beauty froze. Michael had made a mistake. 

"Something like that." The boy mumbled before walking into the house behind him.

Michael’s eyes widened: this was his neighbour. 

Was this the boy Calum talked about?

Calum had said that Ashton had curly hair and the boy in front of him had slight curls due to the rain. But this boy was scrawny. He had no muscles, or a mop of hair. This boy was neat and tidy and didn't give off the vibes that Calum said Ashton had.

Michael had no idea why Calum's words were beginning to irritate him. Calum shouldn't be talking about the innocent boy like he had. Michael didn't want Calum to like him, not because Michael liked him. Hell, he had just met the boy.

"Wait, what's your name?" He yelled into the rain but the blond stranger had already gone.

***

"I think I met Ashton." Michael told Calum as he pulled out the ice cream to hand to the boy.

Calum was quite sad since his ex had come back today to take his things and "talk". But Calum didn't want to talk, Calum screamed and yelled. Calum's ex wasn't a nice guy. Michael had thought so from the start but Calum seemed happy so who was Michael to ruin that for him?

"You what!?" He exclaimed, "Where? He's hot right? Don't think you have a chance, I bagged him."

Michael rolled his eyes and sat down beside Cal having some ice cream too. "He was hurt."

"What?"

"I saw him earlier in a shop and then I saw him again with a bruise."

Cal looked sad, as he thought about the wrong but handsome boy.

"He's not what you said. He has no muscles and isn't all that." Michael said casually and Calum gasped.

"He is hot! And has muscles. Are you sure you met Ash?" He asked. And Michael nodded.

"Maybe it's not him."

"Maybe." Cal agreed.


	5. Lonely Hearts

Luke was cold and scared. Alex was mad and ruthless. 

Luke hadn't meant to, he was worried and when Alex screamed it just fell. Luke tried to calm him down, it was a plate. Just a plate. But Alex said it wasn't.

Alex told him that it wasn't just a plate, it was him, and that he was pathetic and useless. And that Luke always ruined things for him. And Luke started to cry because it was true. That made Alex more mad and he dragged Luke by his blonde locks and hurt him.

It was always like this. Luke was used to the pain and abuse, he should've been numb to it but every time it hurt, more and more. All Luke wanted was to be happy with the man he loved.

The punches to his eyes and kicks to his battered body was too much as he blacked out. A cramped mess in the corner of their broken home.

***

The boy from the store was the first thing to enter Luke's mind as he woke up. He wore all black, and had black earrings. If Luke has too describe him the only word he would say was Black. No other colour would have fit him despite for his bizarrely coloured hair. Luke wondered why he didn't dye that black too.

The only pretty thing about the stranger was his eyes. You wouldn't describe him as pretty, more dangerous, dark, alluring? But his eyes were light. A gorgeous green that reminded Luke of the meadows near his mum's house or the pretty green crystals in her earrings.

Luke knew he wasn't allowed any but he wanted to make friends. He had seen on multiple occasions, the boy leave his house. He didn't seem one for friends except for the tan boy that seem to pop up randomly. Luke knew that they were friends and he also knew that someone like him wouldn't be seen with someone as sad and pathetic as Luke. The boy would probably bully him, but Luke would be friends with anyone at this point.

Luke groaned and stood up, freezing when he heard his voice.

"Get out. I don't want to see you." The voice snarled and Luke felt the oh so familiar pain erupt in his heart and run through the blood in his veins. He let out a choked sob and slid out the door into the cold rain.

Why me? He thought. Why couldn't I be happy, or free?

Luke fell to the ground and huddled up trying to keep warm. He knew he had cracked ages ago, and as time passed the pain in his heart kept growing. There was only some time until his heart would give up on him and he would be ruined.

He looked up worried and met the familiar green eyes that were slowly growing on him. The boy spoke to him, the worry clear in his voice and Luke frowned at how different he sounded to how he did in the shops. The boy must have realised as he spoke again, his voice back to being cold and emotionless. Luke didn't mind as much but he still shuffled away.

The boy watched him silently and crouched down asking if he had got into a fight and Luke cringed. He didn't want to be here so he quickly stood up, nearly slipping and walked back into the house. 

Hoping that Alex hadn't seen them talk.

***

Michael was back home. He was mad because he couldn't think about anything else except for the blue eyed boy he had spoken to earlier. He pulled out a cigarette and lit it up.

This was a bad habit of his, Calum had told him to stop smoking so frequently. Calum smoked with Michael too sometimes but Michael was addicted to the cancer sticks. He sighed loudly as the familiar feeling invaded his lungs.

Old habits die hard.

Michaels mind still wondered back to the small boy. Why was he hurt? He didn't seem the type to get into fights. Or drink beer. 

Maybe he was an addict? Maybe he had a rough life and drank most of it away. Who knows?

Michael soon finished his cigarette and reminded himself to buy a new pack within the next week.

Walking into the bathroom, he caught sight of his hair and grimaced. The colours were fading out, they needed to be changed. Tomorrow, he was gonna go out and buy hair dye. Michael had never liked his appearance, it was bearable and he wished he was more accepting of himself like Calum was.

He couldn't really do much other than wear the clothes he wanted so that's why he liked dying his hair. He could make his hair however he wanted. 

Michael looked at his pale green eyes why couldn't they be more interesting? A nice brown like Calum's that shone in the sun or a bright, beautiful blue like the stranger from across the road.

His eyes were beautiful and Michael was jealous. But he wouldn't mind staring at them everyday.

Get a grip Michael. Stop acting like a pussy. 

Whatever, he thought and got dressed before walking out of his bathroom and deciding to get some sleep. Michael was tired as hell and just wanted to be in bed right now. His mind was exhausted after thinking about the stranger all day. 

And he still hasn't gotten his name yet.

Michael made a vow to himself that the next time they bumped into each other he would find out. Michael didn't like not knowing things, and he always made sure he got what he wanted. But that doesn't mean he wanted the boy. No, Michael thought. I'm just curious, nothing else.

And with that he fell onto his bed and covered himself with the black bedsheets


	6. Sunshine

Luke woke up to the sunshine and smiled to himself. The sun always made things better. He sat up groaning and got off the kitchen floor. He was too scared to go back to their room and Alex hadn't got up to find him so Luke decided to stay where he was.

He glanced at the little clock on the wall and saw it was half past seven in the morning. Luke still had time to do a little tidying up until he had to make breakfast.

He hummed a song as he sweeped the house then mopped. 

Luke loved music. It was his passion but when his mum died and he moved in with Alex, that dream had slowly faded away. He looked at the guitar, his guitar which Alex had always proudly placed on display in the main room. 

Alex loved Luke's singing but he never supported his dreams. He didn't want his precious baby to ever leave him and Luke agreed. Back then, he never wanted to leave. But he wasn't so sure now.

He loved Alex, he did really. 

Looking up, he noticed the time and started on breakfast. He decided to make Alex's favourite to make him happy. Luke wanted to apologise for yesterday, he truly hadn't meant to and he hoped Alex knew.

Finishing touches needed to be made and just as Luke had finished, he heard footsteps down the corridor and stiffened.

Relax Luke, it's your Alex. You love him.

The older man appeared and Luke smiled shyly at him, "Made your favourite." He mumbled and turned away not knowing what to do, so he started cleaning the dishes instead.

"Luke." The man spoke and Luke nodded letting him know he can hear but the man sighed. "Luke baby, turn around."

Baby. That was good.

Luke hesitantly turned around because he still feared his lover. The man had a smile on his face as he looked at his little boy. He loved Luke, loved how innocent and angel-like he was. Loved how he was all his.

Alex patted his knee and Luke looked at him startled. "Come here baby." And Luke did, shuffling forwards and was then pulled down to sit on his lap.

"Thank you for breakfast." He said and Luke nodded. 

"I'm sorry." Luke whispered, "I didn't mean to break it or make you mad."

Luke's boyfriend nodded whilst peppering kisses on Luke's neck. "That's okay baby, I know. I love you."

Luke's eyes watered and he sniffed. He turned around and wrapped his arms and legs around Alex and hid his face in the older man’s neck, crying.

Alex rubbed his back telling him that it was okay and Luke calmed down. Luke loved Alex and Alex loved Luke.

"Come on baby, let's eat." The man picked up a forkful of pancakes and held it up for Luke. The blond happily ate it, smiling at the sweetness of the syrup and leaned back into Alex's chest.

They finished breakfast quietly and then they both sat down in the main room. Luke had been eyeing his guitar and Alex had noticed.

"Play for me." He said and Luke instantly perked up. He eagerly held his guitar, missing the feeling of it in his hands and sat down on the ground, near Alex's feet. 

He thought for a moment deciding on what song to sing and then chose Alex's favourite. 

His soft singing filled the room and the sounds of the guitar complimented his voice well. Luke felt at peace with himself. He felt warm and safe and fuzzy. 

Luke loved the sunshine. Always made things better.

Just as Luke finished singing he was pulled up onto the older man’s lap. Alex stared at Luke happily.

"You don't know how much I love you baby. Love you forever, I promise." Alex said and Luke beamed.

This was what he had always wanted.

"What do you say?" Alex prompted and Luke spoke up. 

"Love you forever Alex. No one else." 

Luke had that memorised in his head now. But he didn't mind saying it, it made Alex happy. Happy Alex was a safe Luke.

***

Michael had a lot to clean up. It had been ages since he had last properly cleaned his house. He decided to pop into the store to buy hair dye in the afternoon instead.

Michael didn't like cleaning, who really did?

He was happy to do most of it but now he had to throw out the bins and he hated that job the most. But he needed to get it done.

Holding his breath, he grabbed the bin bags and walked out when he stopped in his tracks. The pretty boy was kissing another man. For some reason, Michael didn't like that.

He didn't like how the man was groping his small body. And how the boy was kissing him back eagerly- like the man was going to leave all of a sudden.

Michael growled and threw the bins before walking back inside and slamming the door.

He hated how he was affected. What was going on with him? It was driving him crazy, this boy. Michael didn't know him or even like him so why was he always floating in his thoughts and making him suddenly feel things again?

Michael had spent years locking up and hiding away his emotions and in just two days the nameless boy was ruining it all. Michael decided he hated him.


	7. Blue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is use of slight homophobic language, not a lot but it's written. Please be careful.

Looking at the shelves, Michael scanned his options. There was so many different dyes to choose but there was only one that caught his eyes and Michael hated himself for it. He walked away trying to find another colour that might catch his eyes but he gave up and accepted defeat.

He payed for it and didn't waste any time coming back home. As he parked his car he eyed his neighbours house but looked away because it was making him mad.

Michael was glad to get rid of his old hair colour, it looked terrible now that it had started to fade. He bent over the bathtub and got to it, bleaching his hair before pouring however much he needed.

He couldn't wait to see how this one turned out, he had never gone for this colour before.

After an agonising amount of time, Michael washed his hair using the same stained towel he kept specifically for hair dye days to dry it. Taking a breath, he looked in the mirror and surprised himself.

It was just like his, bright but beautiful. It looked out of place but Michael liked it. He wanted to show Calum so he decided to have a quick shower. The boy pulled on his usual black skinny jeans and a t-shirt before pulling on a big jacket and slipped into his shoes. He grabbed a black cap and pulled it on, hiding all the colour away until later.

Michael felt like Michael again. And surprisingly, Michael was happy with how he looked.

The drive to Calum's house wasn't too long. He knocked on the door and could hear Calum shout an, 'I'm coming', but Michael still kept knocking wanting to annoy his friend.

Calum opened the door and groaned, "Should've known it was you."

Michael grinned and stepped inside, following the boy.

Calum looked at Michael and then took a re-take, "Why are you so dressed up?"

Michael couldn't contain his excitement anymore and pulled off his hat.

Calum's eyes nearly fell out and Michael kept grinning, he knew Cal was going to react like that.

"So what do you think?"

"It's-" Calum stuttered, "It's.."

Michael rolled his eyes, "It's.." He dragged out and Calum jumped up.

"Blue!" He shrieked.

"Do you like it?"

Calum nodded, "Holy shit dude it looks fucking sexy. Oh my god let's go clubbing. We're gonna look awesome."

Calum ran upstairs and Michael groaned, "Don't take too long." He yelled not knowing if the excited Maori boy had heard. He could only hope he did.

***

Both boys walked into the club and straight towards the bar. They ordered their drinks and were having a good time until Calum decided to go dancing. Michael waved him off and decided to order another drink.

He had been minding his own business when he heard something he didn't like.

"You fucking faggots are disgusting!"

Michael froze in his seat, blood boiling at the words. He scanned the room and saw the man who was yelling the offensive words.

He was cornering a smaller boy, who obviously couldn't fight for himself. He kept yelling and swearing, no one tried to put a stop to it. And Michael had enough, he stormed towards the man- fists clenched.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" Michael yelled and took the man by surprise. "Don't tell him what's disgusting and what's not. Your behaviour is fucking disgusting."

The man glared at him and Michael glared back, not afraid.

"What, you one of them too?" He sneered and Michael's jaw clenched.

"It's not your business who I like or what I like. Apologise to him right now." He snarled at the man.

"Fuck off, I'm not saying shit." He stated and walked away.

Michael was fuming and grabbed him back by his collar and pinned him to the walls. Quite a crowd was forming but Michael couldn't give a shit.

"You're gonna apologise right fucking now before I drag this further than it needs to."

The man pushed Michael away and glared furiously. "What will you do?" He questioned, testing Michael. Michael hated being doubted, he knew exactly what he was capable of and he wouldn't hesitate in doing it.

"You don't wanna know."

The man laughed and Michael could feel his patience thinning.

"You're a pussy." The man said and Michael's fist met his jaw in an instant.

"You really wanna try me? I've had a few to drink so if I went off on you right now I could blame it on that. You wanna rethink your actions or I swear to god." Michael growled, "Don't test my patience. If I wanted, I could end it for you right here. It wouldn't be a problem for me but it would for you."

Michael let go of his hold and the man staggered forward; holding his jaw in pain and looking at Michael with wide eyes.

"I'm sorry!" He gasped, "I'm sorry, okay."

Michael glanced at the boy who had been victimised. His eyes were huge in fear at the situation but when Michael nodded at him, he smiled gratefully back before Michael walked away.

He wasn't in the mood now, half the club was staring at him and he wanted to go home. Maybe have a cigarette, fuck someone? He didn't know. He sat back down on his seat and leaned his head on his hands, tired.

The bartender took one look at him before making him a drink and Michael took it thankfully. He stood up going to have a smoke when he caught someone's eyes. The man had blond hair that shone in the light but his hair was fake- the roots starting to show. The man's eyes were blue, but not as bright as the stranger across the road.

Michael looked away and downed the remainder of his drink. Sending a quick message to Calum, he walked out of the club. The fake blond somewhere behind him.

***

Loud grunts and moans escaped the strangers lips as Michael thrust his hips repeatedly. Michael craved a release from all the tension and pent up aggression from earlier.

"Fuck." He growled going rougher and the stranger underneath him clearly enjoyed it too. Michael's mind was fogged up by the drinks and the sex. All he could see was blond and blue and that led him to think of the pretty boy from across the road.

Their kisses were rough and they rolled around in the sheets, a naked mess.

Both men finished and fell back in bed. Michael only did sex sometimes, and he had let the stranger know that before they came here. He breathed heavily and waited for the boy to get his things and go.

Once he had left and the lights were off, Michael could really start to relax and he closed his eyes. Covering his sweaty body in the thin sheets, he tried to get some sleep.


	8. Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave comments! This is the first time I'm using this site and I'd like to get to know some of you guys <3

"Ashton!" Luke beamed and jumped onto the older boy, wrapping himself like a koala around him.

Luke loved Ashton so much. Ashton was more family than a friend and Luke would do anything to see him happy. Luke loved Ashton.

Ashton chuckled happily as he held onto Luke tightly. "Missed you Lu." He whispered and Luke sighed happily.

"Missed you too Ash."

Luke finally let go and walked inside, leading Ashton to the kitchen. The older boy hopped onto the counter as Luke walked towards the kettle, making them both some coffee. Ashton loved coffee.

"Today morning was so great Ash. He came down and we had breakfast and he told me he loved me and then I played a song for him on my guitar and he loved it. He loves me Ash." Luke said happily.

Ashton smiled sadly at his more brother than best friend. Luke was his world and Luke always deserved to be happy. He had never and would never intentionally harm anyone. Luke would rather hurt himself to see others smile and that was such a bad trait.

"Luke you can't love him. He's bad for you." Ashton said quietly and Luke had lost the shine in his eyes.

"No he isn't. He doesn't try to be." Luke mumbled quietly and Ashton truly hated himself for not being able to get Luke out of this tarred relationship.

"Has he hurt you since you moved?" Ashton asked sadly and Luke froze. It was slight, no one would have noticed it but Ashton had been best friends with Luke for years now. He saw it straight away. Luke had that familiar cloud of pain take over his eyes and Ashton didn't need an answer for his question anymore.

"So Luke, have you met the neighbours? Or anyone else on your road?" He asked trying to distract his friend but Luke shook his head sadly.

"Do you wanna get to know anyone?" Ashton prodded and Luke hesitated before shaking his head no.

"You sure? You might have some cool neighbours but they won't be as cool as me." Ashton said grinning like a dork to get Luke to smile and it worked, Luke cracked a slight grin to his best friend.

"There's a guy across the road." Luke mumbled catching Ashton's attention. "He seems cool. He always wear black and has cool hair. His friend seems nice."

"They sound awesome." Ashton encouraged, "Should we say go and say hi?"

Luke shook his head immediately." "No! I don't want to. I've got to stay home."

"Hey, hey calm down. It won't be that bad. You could make some more friends because I'm sure I must get boring. Forget about that bastard, he won't know, I'll make sure of it."

Luke cringed at Ashton's choice of words. "I'll never get bored of you Ash." Luke whispered truthfully. Ashton was the only person in the world that made him happy and feel safe. Ashton was the only one that stayed.

Suddenly, there was a ring on the doorbell making them both stop. Luke was scared and Ashton was curious.

"Relax Luke. It's probably random people trying to sell you things. I'll go check for you, yeah?" Ashton offered and Luke nodded.

He watched the muscular boy disappear into the corridor and couldn't help but get curious. Luke followed him and was shocked to see that it was the boy from across the road. He had blue hair now and Luke couldn't help but admire him, the blue looked fantastic.

Luke's eyes widened when he realised that they were coming in. Quickly, he ran back to the kitchen pretending to be doing some work.

"Luke, look who's here." He heard his best friend say.

Slowly, Luke turned around to face the two strangers. He felt the blue haired boys gaze on him and looked down blushing. The blue boy was gorgeous.

"This is Calum and Michael." Ash said pointing to the two and Luke smiled politely.

Michael.

"Hi!" The dark haired boy smiled and offered his hand. Luke looked at him shyly and took his hand shaking it. "You made a great choice moving here." He said making Luke nod, he hoped the boy was right.

"So," Calum began, "You and Ashton?"

Ashton burst out laughing and Luke flushed furiously. The hazel eyed boy looked back at his best friend and wrapped an arm around his waist holding him close whilst still laughing like crazy.

"Luke and I are best friends." He said pecking Luke's hair and Luke leaned against him. Ashton looked down, smiling at the fact that he could easily comfort his best friend.

"So what about you two?" Ashton asked curiously pointing to the two boys and Calum grimaced.

"Eww, never. I have better taste." He sneered and Michael jabbed his back making Calum glare at him.

"Well if you've got better taste, stop involving yourself in my life." Michael said half offended.

"If I leave you alone you wouldn't have a life." Calum said matter of factly making Ashton burst out into laughter.

Luke studied Calum and how he blushed when Ashton laughed, the boy was proud of himself. Michael didn't seem bothered but he had this look on his face as he watched Luke and then he shifted slightly not wanting to be looked at so intensely.

"So." Michael spoke and Luke froze. His voice wasn't what Luke had expected. It wasn't rough or seemed scary it was kind and inviting and sounded safe. He seemed like he would have a beautiful laugh.

"What about you Luke? Where's your boyfriend? I've seen him around earlier but where is he today?" Michael said shocking the younger boy, how did he know about Alex?

Ashton stiffened at Michael's words and Luke rubbed his back calming his best friend down.

"He's at work right now." Luke said quietly and Michael nodded in approval whilst Calum still had a bright smile on his lips. Calum seemed like he was always happy. It was nice being around him.

"So how serious are you guys?"

"We've been together for a few years. I love him." Luke said quietly and Calum looked overjoyed whilst Michael's face was still emotionless. Luke knew Ashton didn't approve but Luke couldn't help that.

"Ash." Luke whispered tugging at Ashton's hand, he looked down worried.

"What's wrong?" He asked and Luke shook his head, "Nothing's wrong but I'm scared he might come back." He admitted. Ashton's jaw clenched but he still smiled at his best friend, letting him know that he would sort it out.

"Sorry to cut this short but Luke's not feeling too good. Must be something I made earlier." He said laughing, "I'm shit at cooking."

Calum laughed and Michael just nodded. They said their goodbyes and Luke smiled kindly at the pair before they left. Finally, he could breathe.

"They're nice." Aston said and Luke agreed. "I think Calum likes you." He said quietly making Ashton beam at that.

"He's cute and funny. You think he does?" Ash asked and Luke nodded eagerly.

His best friend hadn't had a girlfriend or boyfriend in ages, Luke hadn't seen him happy with someone in a long time. Maybe Calum would be good for him.

Ashton smiled knowingly at the blue eyed boy and spoke, "Highlighter over here has a thing for you."

Luke blushed at his words, "Highlighter?"

Ash just shrugged, "His hair was so bright and blue like he had just freshly died it."

"I liked it." Luke said frowning and the older boy nodded. "Me too, I didn't mean to sound like that."

"Couldn't take his eyes off you." Ash said grinning and Luke shook my head despite the little flutter in the bottom of his stomach.

"I have Alex."

"Doesn't mean you two can't be friends." Ashton said and Luke sighed, "I've got you and you know how Alex is."

Ashton was angry again, "I know too well. Don't let him stop you Lu, he's a bastard. You deserve friends."

The blond nodded, thinking about Ashton's words. Alex didn't think so, he hated Ashton. Alex thought that Luke was too innocent to see that Ashton just wanted to have sex. But Alex didn't know Ash; he didn't know how kind, thoughtful and beautiful Ashton was as a person.

Alex was nothing compared to Ashton but Luke still loved him for loving someone as ugly and messed up as himself.

Luke had always been a little stupid.


	9. Doubts

"Michael's in love! Michael's in love!" Calum sang, skipping across the room, smile as bright as the sun.

"Shut up Calum!" Michael yelled for the third time making Calum laugh at his friend evilly. "No! It's not everyday your best friend falls in love, especially if that best friend is you."

Calum was right. This wasn't Michael.

"Oh come on, what's the long face for? Luke's adorable!" Calum fell back onto the sofa, head on Michael's lap, "I just can't believe it! I've been your best friend for years."

Michael growled and pushed Calum off, "Nothing's changed. I'm still the same. Stop talking about this, muscle man was there too! Talk about him instead."

"Muscle man." Calum hummed, "I like it."

Michael was mad at how unbothered Calum was by the situation, "Oh just fuck off you dick."

Calum smirked, "But you like dick."

The blue haired boy growled at his friend- beyond mad -and Calum just grinned from where he was sprawled on the floor. Calum could sense the uneasiness radiate off his best friend and took some sympathy.

"Look Mike don't worry. Luke's Luke. He's no one else." Michael looked at at his friend and Calum patted the space beside him. Michael joined him on the floor and sighed, frustrated.

"I know you like how you are. But you can't be lonely forever. We were meant to socialise, you can't force yourself to be isolated." Calum said and Michael winced at the thought of it.

"Luke is different. Anyone can tell, he's shy and is adorable. Like an angel, he won't hurt you. He can't hurt you." Michael had already thought about that but Calum wasn't thinking about the destruction Michael could do, to the poor boy.

"You're not thinking about me!" He yelled, the anger at himself returning.

"I'm not good. I'm bad for him. I'm bad for anyone. I can't do it." Michael admitted and Calum was sad for his friend.

"Michael you've just gotta move on and believe in yourself. No one else might see it but you're a wonderful person. You care about me and buy me food and let me eat all yours. When I'm drunk, who else comes and gets my stupid ass? It's you. Don't be hard on yourself."

Michael sighed, "He's got a boyfriend. I don't have a chance. That's if I did anyway, why would he be with me. He's practically perfect with that pretty face and big blue eyes."

Calum was squealing on the inside, this new boy was making his old friend return. Michael was opening up to his feelings and Calum was sure Luke could bring back the old Michael.

"Hey, you're good looking too. You've got a green eyes- everyone dies for your eyes. And you've got blue hair, no one else could rock that." Calum's eyes widened in realisation.

"Your hair. It's his!" He shrieked. Calum always knew his bestie was an emotional little puppy at heart.

"What?" Michael asked frowning clearly feigning innocence. Red filled his pale cheeks and Calum just smiled in awe, "Your hair is the same colour as Luke's eyes isn't it. That's why you did it. I knew there was a reason. Ahh, Michael I love you, you big softie!"

"Whatever." Michael rolled his eyes and Calum just smiled happily.

***

Ashton had long gone and Alex wasn't happy about it. Luke knew his best friend made Alex insecure but Luke loved Alex a lot.

Shyly, the blond made his way towards the older man and perched on his lap.

"How was your day?" He asked pecking Alex's neck because he couldn't reach anywhere else.

"Alright." Alex said and Luke hummed.

"I love you." He whispered making Alex sigh. "I know, me too baby."

Luke wasn't happy with that answer, Love was precious to Luke. So he shuffled closer to the man and stared at him before he leaned in, connecting their lips.

"Don't be sad." Luke mumbled, "Don't like it when you're sad."

Alex pulled Luke closer and kissed him, making Luke smile. "Okay baby."

The man kissed Luke harder, "Wanna show me how much you love me?" Luke nodded shyly. He wanted to reassure his lover that he was no one else's but his. Luke had felt uneasy since the unexpected visit from his neighbour so he wanted to feel normal again. Normal was Alex, it had always been Alex.

The man held Luke tightly and took them both upstairs to the immaculate bedroom they shared. Luke kissed his boyfriend with need, he wanted to feel all the old emotions. Things were good before. Luke wasn't asking for a lot, he just wanted it to be good. Good was enough for him.

Soon they were both naked under the covers and Luke moaned quietly as his boyfriend loved him.

"That's right baby, show me how good I can make you feel. You're mine, no one else's. Not Ashton's, no ones."

Luke loved Alex but he didn't like how he thought there was competition with Ashton. Luke's heart belonged to Alex. Alex started getting rougher, Luke didn't mind but he liked it to be slow and meaningful. Especially since after today, he craved to feel loved.

"Come on baby, it's your turn." Alex grunted and flipped them around. Luke hadn't been in control since ages and was determined to show Alex that he still had hold of his heart.

They both groaned as Luke moved on top of him. Luke felt a little swelling in his heart as Alex mumbled how good he felt and how he loved him. It felt genuine and real like how it was before and Luke carried on pleasuring them both.

"Fuck baby." Alex groaned and attacked Luke's pale neck. Luke had collapsed on the bed happy and tired. He hummed as Alex left marks on his neck.

"You know I'll always be yours." Luke mumbled. "No one else's. No one else will love me like you." He said sadly. Luke wanted to love so many people and make them happy. You could love a lot of people and only be in love with one. But Alex didn't understand that.

Alex smiled widely at his boy and kissed him hard. Despite being tired, Luke went for another round because he loved making his boyfriend happy.


	10. White Lies

"Just ask if you can hang out." Calum said and Michael shrugged.

"It's not that easy." Michael groaned and Calum rolled his eyes, "Then don't make it so hard."

Michael wanted to punch Calum for being right.

"Look I'll stay here while you go and when you come back you can tell me how it went." Calum offered.

"You just want my food you pig." And Calum shrugged, "Why else would I be here? Not for you."

Michael grabbed a hat and was about to leave when Calum stopped him.

"Don't wear it. He likes your hair."

"How do you know?" Michael asked, secretly happy.

"I could tell. Couldn't keep his eyes off it."

Michael walked out of his house smiling on the inside. Maybe he did have a chance? He knocked on the door waiting patiently; he wasn't met with blue eyes but brown ones. They were cold and not warm like Calum's brown ones and Michael instantly put his guard up.

"Who are you?" The man asked.

"Michael Clifford. I live across the street." He said pointing to his house. The man nodded, "Did you need anything?"

The man spoke rudely and Michael couldn't believe that someone as small and shy as Luke loved someone as cold as the man he was speaking to.

"Umm, is Luke in? Just wanted to hang out for a bit." Michael said and noticed how the man stiffened.

"You know Luke?" He said and Michael nodded.

"Luke's friend was around yesterday and we met them both. Shame you weren't in." He said, lying blatantly.

"Well he's not in right now. So you should leave." The man said coldly and Michael glared at his rudeness.

"Well when he comes back let him know Michael came by." And the man nodded stiffly before closing the door on him.

Michael had a frown as he walked back home. The man was obviously lying and Michael wanted to know why. Did Luke not like him?

He stormed inside and Calum looked up from his seat on the couch. His eyebrows knitted together in confusion, "You're early."

"He's a liar." Michael growled holding onto the edge of the table angrily.

Calum looked at him in concern, "Who's a liar?"

"His boyfriend." Michael spat taking a deep breath. "Luke's in, I know he is."

"Okay, okay. Relax." Calum rushed out.

"I hate him." Michael said and Calum frowned. "Who his boyfriend?" Michael shook his head no, "Luke."

"What?! Why?! You can't just say that Mike!" Cal gasped hoping his best friend didn't mean it.

"Well I did!" The blue hair boy seethed, the bones in his knuckles looked like they were about to burst.

***

"It wasn't for long." Luke whimpered. "I p-promise. They knocked and Ash had to invite them in. It would be rude n-not to."

"I don't fucking care." Alex snarled angrily at the thought of the strangers being in his home and staring at his boy. Luke was very attractive so many people liked staring at the beauty.

Luke groaned at the pain in his gut and his breathing increased as Alex's grip on his neck tightened. There was a slight ringing in his ears and he couldn't breathe well. Luke was positive that his face was a plum colour and he gasped as Alex only kept applying pressure.

"P-please stop." Luke whimpered. But the rage in Alex was unstoppable. Seeing Luke squirm under him, only fuelled the fire within and he hurt the boy more. The black and blue bruises scattered all over Luke's skin looked beautiful to the man.

"You're gonna stop fucking talking to that freak!" He raged and Luke nodded his head eagerly even though he hardly spoke to him.

"I-I won't. I promise, I never did and never will."

Luke was dropped to the ground where he gasped for air. Head placed on the cold ground. He felt the warm trail of tears on his skin and saw them splash on to the polished floor.

But Alex wasn't done yet, Luke needed to be taught a lesson.

Cries of pain echoed through the hallway as Alex abused his boyfriend. Luke's arms had wrapped around his body for protection as Alex yet again kicked his stomach. No amount of pleading would stop him, Luke deserved this. That's what Alex had always said and Luke listened.

When the man was done, he left the house slamming the door loudly. Luke just cried.

The emotional and verbal abuse spilled out in the form of tears. Luke knew the difference between right and wrong and Luke hadn't done anything wrong, so why was he getting punished?

He was shivering on the floor, so he decided to get dressed into something loose and also examine the bruises.

There was more purple than white on Luke's skin and he was scared. His fingers traced lightly over the marks and he whimpered. His body looked weak and his eyes sad and lifeless. Luke had looked like this for years and he missed the old him. The old and better Luke with the shiny hair and bright eyes and the dimply smile. The happy Luke.

The doorbell unexpectedly rang and he froze. Alex never forgot his keys. What if he gets mad again? Quickly, he slipped on a black hoodie wincing at how the fast actions affected his body. Running a hand through his hair he opened the door; body struck with absolute terror.

It was Michael.

***

Michael waited outside Luke's house patiently for the second time. He didn't want to be here but Calum insisted. When the door opened, he couldn't stop staring at the boy who opened it. The black hoodie contrasted against his pale skin and that's when Michael noticed the dark bags under Luke's eyes. There also seemed to be bruises and Michael looked at him in confusion, "What happened?"

Luke looked around anxiously before glancing down at his feet."Nothing I'm fine, just a bit sick. How have you been Michael?" He asked politely and Michael swore he could hear the excitement in himself because Luke had remembered his name.

"I'm good. I came 'round earlier." He said and Luke nodded stiffly, "Yeah I heard about that. Sorry I wasn't in and couldn't tell you."

The green eyed boy nodded and put his hands in his pockets, there was something off about Luke and he didn't like it. "Do you wanna exchange numbers?" Michael asked quickly and he could see the alarm in Luke's eyes for a quick second before it disappeared and his usual kind eyes were back.

"I'm sorry I don't have my phone on me right now, it's broken." He said politely and the older boy shrugged, "You could give me your number." He offered but Luke shook his head.

"I got a new number recently and can't remember it, I'm sorry." Michael sighed in defeat. "Maybe next time, do you wanna hang out sometime?"

Luke gave him a small smile which Michael couldn't help but return. Despite being sick, Luke looked gorgeous when he smiled. "That'd be nice." He said quietly and Michael nodded pathetically, too busy admiring the pretty boy.

"I'm sorry to cut this short but I'm really tired and was planning on getting some sleep." Luke said shyly and Michael nodded with a smile. Luke looked at Michael expectantly and Michael realised he hadn't responded.

"Umm yeah! Sorry about that." He said awkwardly, "Get some sleep, bye Luke."

Luke nodded at him and waved his hand before stepping back inside and locking himself away from the world.


	11. Flowers and Forgiveness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some Muke interaction!

The house had been quiet for days. Luke keeping himself busy with cleaning, cooking, secretly playing the guitar and spying on the boy across the street. Luke and Alex were like two ghosts and Luke hated it. The tension between the two was unbearable.

He felt lonely at home. Alex was at work, and Luke envied him. Alex had people he knew, friends he went to the bar with. Alex had friends and still had Luke. Why couldn't it be like that for Luke? Luke was thankful that Ashton fought with Alex about seeing his best mate. If Ash had been scared then Luke would have lost him along the way.

All Luke had was Alex, Ashton and the four walls he lived in. They knew everything he had to suffer through and he couldn't help but be selfish. He wanted more. Luke wanted friends, a family, freedom. He wanted his own supply of sunshine; to keep him happy during the hard times. As he glanced outside, he spotted Michael and sighed. Luke wanted Michael in his life too.

Michael was cool and also seemed to be interested in being friends. Luke could see it working out for Ashton as well since he knew, well he assumed, that Michael's friend had feelings for Ash. That could be a good thing.

Luke came out of the little bubble he was in and saw the blue haired boy wave at him. He felt his heart flutter at the slight communication and raised his hand up too, smiling softly. This resulted in the blue haired boy to break out into a grin and Luke felt light headed. The blond had never seen him smile so much since he had moved and he was happy knowing that Michael was too.

He stepped back from the window and decided to occupy himself with something else knowing that Michael was dangerous to him. Alex would get mad again and he didn't want that.

With a sigh, Luke pulled out one of Alex's books and placed himself on the big couch. He opened the book and read happily as the sun shone down on him. Maybe Alex would be happy seeing him read?

***

A few hours had gone by and Luke frowned as he put the book down. He had reached a very interesting part but if he didn't start now then lunch wouldn't be finished in time for when Alex came back. He got out all the ingredients needed for spaghetti bolognese. Luke had never really enjoyed cooking but after a few years it had grown on him and he found some comfort in the activity.

He hummed happily to himself as he made the sauce, keeping an eye on the pasta. He hadn't heard the front door open until he heard someone sneeze. He looked at the clock and frowned, Alex was home early.

Turning around he saw his boyfriend standing there with two bags of flowers and a red nose. He had hay fever and the flowers weren't helping.

"What's this?" Luke asked quietly and the man put the bags down sneezing again.

"Flowers for you." He said simply, "I was thinking maybe you could plant them. Since last years ones died out. They're okay right?" He asked nervously and Luke couldn't help but grin.

"Oh Alex, they're perfect." Luke didn't want to go up to the man for a hug, to then be rejected, so he stayed glued to the spot on the ground, watching him with wide eyes. 

Alex sneezed again rubbing his nose before spreading his arms, "No hug for me?" He questioned and Luke couldn't stop himself from running into his lover’s arms.

He sighed contently at the pleasant feeling of being wrapped up in someone's arms. "I'm sorry baby, you know I had to." Alex whispered talking about yesterday and Luke nodded. "I know and it's okay because I still love you."

He stepped out of the mans embrace and returned back to the stove checking up on lunch. 

"Maybe I could plant them this afternoon?" He asked and Alex agreed. "That'd be great baby. I've still got a bit of work left so I'll have to go back out after lunch but I'll see you soon after."

Luke nodded and got the plates ready for lunch. He noticed Alex watching him and he smiled at the man hoping that this time his good mood would last longer. 

***

Luke loved the feeling of the dirt in his hands. He was on his knees digging holes in the soil for the plants. There were pretty yellows, whites and light pinks and Luke was overjoyed.

"What a sight." 

The blond looked up and met eyes with Michael. Michael wasn't dressed up but he still managed to look fabulous with his black jeans, grey vest and messy blue hair; the sun making his green eyes sparkle. Luke couldn't help but blush at his own appearance, he wore a faded band tee and instead of shorts (he had to hide his bruises) he wore some old sweatpants and had dirt in his hands and knowing him, probably had some in his hair.

"Hi." Luke said quietly going back to his work. Alex had long gone but what if he suddenly popped up? What would Luke do?

"What are you doing?" Michael asked curiously and Luke kept his head down, still digging as he spoke. "Planting some flowers."

Michael hummed and looked at the flowers, "They're pretty." Luke nodded smiling to himself, they were pretty.

"Pretty flowers for a pretty boy. I can see why you boyfriend keeps you all to himself." Michael said making Luke's cheeks go red. "Thank you." He said politely, "You're pretty too."

Michael's eyebrows raised in amusement as Luke flushed realising what he had just said. "Well you're too cool to be pretty. I meant that you're not ugly you're good looking." He said fumbling awkwardly over his words only making Michael smile wide.

Luke decided to go back to his work and knew that Michael was still present. He didn't have the guts to tell the boy to leave because he knew Michael would demand an answer as to why and Luke was too shy to tell him that he felt uncomfortable. He happily planted his flowers into their spaces, getting lost in his own world until he heard Alex.

"Baby they look great." 

Luke looked up smiling widely and felt slight panic as he saw that Michael was still standing on the pavement but there was now a frown etched onto his lips.

"Thank you." Luke said and stood up, knees in slight pain.

Alex wrapped an arm around Luke's waist and the blond instantly leaned against him, sighing into his neck.

"What do you think of our garden?" Alex asked Michael, a slight ghost of a smirk on his lips. Michael glared at the older, not hiding his annoyance.

"Luke's garden is great. Beautiful just like him." He said. Luke was a deep red at all the compliments he was receiving.

"Yeah that's right. My boyfriend is beautiful." Alex said with clenched teeth. The two glared at each other. 

Luke tapped Alex's chest softly and the older man looked down smiling at the blue eyed boy before kissing him. Luke smiled happily into the kiss forgetting that Michael was watching them, otherwise he would have been too shy. 

Alex's hands purposely ran down Luke's body pulling the smaller boy closer and Luke groaned quietly when Alex's hand was dangerously near that part. 

"Not now we're outside." He mumbled shyly and turned around blushing at the sight of a furious Michael.

"That's okay baby. Michael's here too, we wouldn't want to give him a show. We'll take this back to the bedroom." Alex said smirking widely at Michael and the blue boy stormed off not wanting to hear anymore.


	12. Black and White

The wind was harsh and the sky a grim grey. Angry clouds littered the sky, overall it was a glum day. Michael sat numbly on the bench. Tips of his ears pink from the cold. The mass of dirt in front of him had been his centre of attention for the past hour. He didn't know why he was here today. Guess he just needed to take his mind off things. But this wouldn't help him if he was honest, this would make it worse.

His blue hair looked striking compared to the absence of colour in the world. Michael associated living with bright colours, happiness and everything he wasn't. He felt a little bit of that when he caught sight of the blond boy; new feelings emerged in his jet black heart and it left him upset and craving more. But he knew that wasn't his life.

Michael saw the world in specks of black, white and grey. He wasn't living, he was simply staying in his own little part of the world. He had been doing that for years. The only splashes of colour were his ridiculous hair choices and Luke's twinkling eyes and radiant smile. And he hated that he had no control over his world ever since the boy slipped in through the seams but Michael had no intention of removing him from his life.

Michael stood up to leave not wanting to be here anymore. He glanced at the stone one last time before walking off. He wanted to let loose, free his mind and he knew exactly where he was going.

***

The familiar smell was good, comforting even and Michael carried on, a little bit of excitement in his body. He anticipated the end product. 

Bits of black and white swirled together. Some tones lighter than others and he couldn't be more relaxed. He pursed his lips before deciding to add the blue strokes, blue was really starting to become his favourite colour. His tongue stuck out in precision, he couldn't fuck this up. He just couldn't.

Michael stepped back, the art amazing him and he couldn't stop the light pink blush on his cheeks as he carried on, deciding not to leave. He wanted to stay, and finish of this piece. He couldn't leave this one unsaid.

The green eyed boy awed at the magic of his hands. Maybe, he could do some things right? He didn't want to leave this one here, he wanted to bring it home. But he couldn't, so he took a picture. Hoping that it'd never get lost in his mind.

Quickly changing his lock screen, he put his phone away and started to pack up. It wasn't that late, he'd still have time to hit the corner shop for a pack of cigarettes. He sighed contently, things were okay today. 

Michael took the long way home, he was in no rush. He had brought what he needed and as always, he watched the cigarette smoke swirl beautifully in the sky intertwining with its self before fading away. 

He reached the corner of his street, eyes widening as soon as someone bumped into him. Staggering back, worry filled Michael from head to toe.

Under the streetlights, Luke looked like an angel. Slight fuzz from the dim lights made it seem like he had a halo and his hair was perfectly messy. But that's not what caught his eye. The dark bruises on his pale skin had. His eyes were big and crazed as he stared at Michael and Michael hadn't missed the whimper he heard when the two boys bumped into each other. Michael was sure Luke had more bruises.

"Luke?" He said not meaning to lower his voice but it was like his mind had already adjusted to the angel in front of him. He knew how to behave and act around Luke so he wasn't scared. Michael suddenly felt a wave of emotion sweep his body, he always wanted Luke to be safe. He was too good a person to be hurt, unlike Michael.

"I-I've gotta go." Luke trembled, "C-can't be here with you." Michael didn't think he was meant to hear the last two words but he did. And his heart ached.

"No! Umm.. don't go, you're hurt. What happened?" Michael asked softly reaching his hand out to hold the younger boy but Luke flinched back, stumbling over his feet. The pain in Michael's heart grew as he watched the mess of a boy. What had happened to him?

"S-sorry. I didn't mean too." He fumbled over his words, voice increasing with worry. Luke's eyes started to water and Michael just wanted to pull the younger boy into his arms. 

"That's okay Luke. You're okay, you've done nothing wrong, yeah." He said nodding his head, attempting to calm the boy down and Luke looked up into his eyes nodding along. Michael gave him a small smile and stepped in a tiny bit closer and Luke looked up and down making sure he wouldn't get hurt again. 

They held eye contact again and Michael could see all the raw pain in his eyes. 

"Can I help?" He asked carefully and Luke stood frozen under the lights. "Got to go. Can't stay." He mumbled and Michael frowned, "Where are you going?" But Luke didn't say.

"What about your boyfriend?" Michael asked. He saw the way Luke had smiled at the man and how he kissed him. Mike realised that Luke would probably be less scared if his boyfriend was here and it hurt to admit that.

Luke looked down at the ground and Michael sensed his discomfort. "Let's go to mine, we can sort you out." Luke shook his head and Michael sighed. "Please? No one will know if you don't want them. I promise, I just wanna help." After some thought, Luke nodded timidly and Michael felt some relief.

As soon as they entered the warm house, they saw Calum in the kitchen, which surprised pair, "Hey I came over because it got boring and-"

The Maori stopped and looked at Luke in shock but when he saw the look Michael shot him he returned back to his usual self and smiled widely. "Hey Luke, great to see you. Like the new additions, you look hot." 

Michael glared at his best friend really wanting to slap him but he had to keep cool. Luke flushed at Calum's words but his body stayed tight and rigid.

"Ignore him, he's an ass." Michael said and guided Luke to the kitchen. Michael occasionally looked over his shoulder checking that the boy was following him and he was. 

"Have a seat, don't feel awkward." Michael said and Luke quietly sat on the kitchen stool, his long legs reached the ground and Michael couldn't stop staring. Luke was as silent as a mouse in everything he did. 

He placed a water bottle on the counter for the frightened boy and asked if he wanted a hot drink instead but Luke politely declined leaving Michael standing in front of the him with an ice pack.

"It'll hurt at first." He said to the boy and Luke nodded, "I know."

Michael frowned at what Luke had just said but decided not to pick it up since the boy had clearly been through a lot.

***

"You look hot! You look hot my ass!" Michael quietly raged at Calum. "He was bloody bruised Cal, you don't say it's fucking hot!"

"What else was I meant to say?!" 

Michael glared at the idiot in front of him, "Maybe ask him how he was doing? I don't know! Ask about his friend Ashford?! I really don't give a shit!"

Calum sighed and went back to scrolling on his phone, "Relax Loverboy, it didn't bother him. Well I wanted to go out with you but Luke's here so I'll just go back home. It'll give you a peace of mind."

"Don't forget to lock the door." Michel said simply and Calum held up the spare keys nodding to his friend. Michael had given him the key for emergencies. Clearly he didn't know how to use it.

Michael rolled his eyes at that and dragged his feet to the fridge to grab a bottle of cold water before trudging back up the stairs.

He didn't want to leave Luke but it would be creepy if he stayed in the room where Luke slept so he decided to move to the other guest room just in case.

He couldn't stop the questions in his mind but was too tired to even think of a possible solution as his eyes grew heavy.


	13. Heartache

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Random, but I really like this chapter.

Luke sat up in a fright and looked around the strange room. Panic grew inside him since he couldn't make out the surroundings. He tried to control his breathing but ended up crying even more. He hadn't realised he was whimpering in his sleep until he felt his throat close off and he couldn't breathe. 

It was dark and the door was closed, Luke never slept like that. He always left the door ajar and kept the curtains wide open so he could see outside. 

He huddled on the bed, knees touching his chest as he cried quietly. As much as he was scared, he wanted to go home. Back to Alex. Because even if Alex was mad, Alex looked after Luke. Alex knew everything about Luke and Luke wanted to feel some comfort.

He hadn't realised he wasn't alone until he heard a groggy voice call out for him. 

"Luke? What's wrong?" 

The blond peered up and froze when he saw the familiar head of blue hair. The light leaked into the room and Luke watched as Michael yawned and rubbed his eyes before coming inside.

"How did I get here?" Luke asked quietly and Michael sat on the edge of the bed. Luke could see clearly now. Michael had on some black joggers but no shirt and Luke couldn't help blushing. 

"You don't remember?" Michael asked and Luke shook his head.

"It doesn't matter right now. Why were you crying? I went to get some water and heard you." Michael asked with so much worry that Luke wanted to start crying again.

"Got scared." Luke mumbled and Michaels pink lips frowned slightly. 

"Scared? Of what? You know I'd never hurt you." Michael said softly and Luke felt a little flutter in his heart but he dismissed the feeling. Luke looked away suddenly feeling embarrassed. He was sure he looked a mess. Luke never cared for his looks but now that Michael was here he couldn't help worry over his hair and he sighed when he remembered he had big, ugly bruises on his face. 

"What?" Michael asked and Luke shrugged.

"How do you feel?" Michael asked instead and Luke shrugged again.

Michael rubbed his face and turned to directly face Luke. "You don't speak much do you?" Luke was about to shrug again but Michael spoke, cutting him off. "Don't shrug."

Luke slumped on the bed and played with the rip in his jeans, "I feel better." He said quietly missing the small smile on Michael's face. 

"Well that's good." Michael said and Luke nodded and got off the warm bed, shivering slightly. 

"Do you want anything?" Michael asked standing up too and Luke nodded, "I want to go home please."

"What?" Michael asked confused. "It's nearly three in the morning Luke, just stay the night. I'm sure your boyfriend won't mind."

Luke was hidden in the shadows of the room so Michael couldn't see the way he trembled at the mention of his boyfriend. If Luke could have his way, he would stay with the blue haired boy forever and hide away from Alex. Luke wanted to get to know the boy because there was something about him that fascinated his innocent mind.

"Please." Luke tried again knowing that it wouldn't be safe for if Alex caught him leaving Michael's house despite being told not to go near him.

"But-"

Luke walked towards Michael and delicately touched his hand. Unknown feelings sparked through his body and he tried hard not to show he was affected. "Please Mikey, I want to go." He whispered and Michael's green eyes only held sympathy as he nodded. 

"Thank you." Luke breathed, before stepping out of the room. Michael followed wordlessly behind, thinking of ways to convince the boy to stay but none seemed valid enough. He ran a hand through his messy, blue hair and unlocked the door. Luke smiled at him and Michael knew he wouldn't be able to get that image out of his mind. Not even if he tried.

With sad eyes, Michael unknowingly watched Luke return to his hell. And Luke felt his heart sink as he walked further away. He wanted to stay with Michael a bit longer and even try to get to know him but he wouldn't be able to get rid of the guilt in his heart. 

Alex would be even more mad and Luke couldn't have that. He didn't want anyone knowing at all what happened at home. Alex was a good man, really, he was. Luke thought so but not everyone would think like him. Luke loved Alex too much to let anything happen to him, he sadly thought about how Alex didn't seem to care about him. If Luke got hurt it was mostly Alex doing the hurting. Luke's mind was still hopelessly praying that one day, Alex would change.

But Luke's heart said another. 

Michael cared. Today it showed and Luke couldn't deal with the kindness he received. Luke knew Michael was a good person and he was jealous of the person who got to spend the rest of their life with him.

Quietly, he took off his boots and went up the stairs trying to avoid the creaky steps along the way. Everything was more or less the same and Luke's heart hurt. There was no broken flowerpots, or books on the ground or shattered pieces of glass to show Alex's anger or frustration at the fact that his boyfriend was hurt and had left home. The only things that were on the ground were the ones that had been thrown at Luke before he left.

Warm tears slipped onto his cheeks and he quickly wiped them away stopping himself from crying. If Alex heard then he'd get angry again and Luke was just too tired to deal with that. He didn't want to go upstairs or back to bed so he curled up on the sofa, cradling a pillow to his chest. The last thing his eyes had set on was the house across the street with the big windows and the kind boy living inside before he fell fast asleep.


	14. Something New

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like this :)

Luke had quietly served breakfast and went back upstairs to do the bed and some dusting, he didn't feel like eating and Alex sure didn't seem bothered whether he did or didn't. No words had been exchanged and Luke was worried he'd go mad. The rough slam of the door echoed through the house and he knew Alex was gone for the day. Leaning against the wall, Luke sighed deeply and looked outside. Alex's car had flashed away leaving Luke to stare aimlessly out the window.

There wasn't much to do here, Luke didn't want to play guitar or watch TV and he was too scared to call Ashton to come over. He would get mad at Alex for all the bruises. Luke decided to check how his body was healing so he pulled off the huge hoodie and looked sadly at his body. He hated it so much.

He hated his skin; his limp hair; dull eyes. Luke had no personality or mind of his own. He never had the option to choose what he wanted because Alex always knew best. Luke hated his boring clothes as well. Seeing all kinds of different people with their pretty outfit choices left him despising his own.

Ashton had so many cool shirts and trousers and shoes. He had interesting tattoos that Luke spent hours looking at and designing some of his own and Ashton always loved them. Some days his hairstyle would be loose and wild or slicked back but Luke's favourite was when he wore colourful bandanas. They looked great on his best friend. 

Luke thought about Michael and his cool hair. And rare eyes. How despite having pale skin like Luke, he suited it, he could make it look interesting with the black tattoos and how it just seemed to look great in him. From what Luke saw, Michael wore flannels and jumpers sometimes but he had a lot of band tee's and black. 

Luke thought back to his teenage years, he owned so many different band shirts. He missed his old life.

Luke didn't want to seem ungrateful. He was so thankful for Alex for taking him out of the black hole he fell into but it only seemed like he created an illusion before putting him into an even deeper place. Luke had never been so trapped.

There was a knock on the door and the blond knew who it was instantly. A little smile was on his lips as he forgot about his worries. Alex wasn't here and Luke just wanted to get to know the boy. So, with a breath, he adjusted his hoodie and opened the door. 

Michael stood there nervously, black skinny jeans and T-shirt on with his blue hair done to perfection. 

"Hi." Luke breathed and Michael smiled at him kindly. "Hi Luke. How are you?"

Luke gulped before speaking, "I've been better." He admitted and Michael nodded. 

"Do you wanna sit outside?" Luke offered timidly. "Kinda hot in there."

A huge grin spread on Michael's lips and Luke could only blush at his reaction. "I'd love that."

Luke stepped out the house, closing the door and both boys sat on the lawn. Luke with his knees up and Michael sprawled everywhere. 

"So.." Michael started, "Where's your boyfriend?" 

"At work." Luke mumbled and Michael nodded, "What about you, do you work?"

Luke flushed slightly, "Used to, at a record store. But then I met Alex and things changed." Michael looked at Luke curiously, "Why'd you stop?"

Luke carried on twirling the grass in between his fingers, "Alex said he missed me while I was gone. He didn't want me to work much, said that's what he was here for."

Luke had his eyes down still focusing on the green blades of grass so he couldn't see the way Michael had his fists clenched.

"And you just listened? Did you not want to work anymore or did he make you stop?" Michael asked cautiously and Luke didn't say anything letting them both know the answer.

"It was for the best." Luke said and Michael didn't argue back. 

Luke bit his lips softly. And the action had Michael mesmerised as he stared at the beautiful boy. Luke was the definition of perfect; it was like he had been carved by God himself. Sharp jawline; pretty pink lips; flawless skin. He made Michael look inferior.

"Mikey?" Luke asked again softly and Michael thought about kissing the boy. He was so sweet and innocent and so different to Michael, which just intrigued him more. The mere thought of connecting their lips together and trailing his fingers down Luke's skin had Michael go crazy inside. He wanted the boy. 

A light tap on his knees brought him out of his thoughts.

"What did you say?" He asked blushing. Michael knew Luke had caught him staring but he couldn't blame himself. Luke was attractive.

"How's Calum?" He asked politely and Michael grimaced. "The little shit just comes to eat." Luke couldn't help but laugh at Michael's words and Michael was stunned at how loud and raspy his laugh was. Michael didn't think he ever saw Luke laugh and he was beyond glad that he was the reason.

"He has a thing for muscles, so please don't invite him to yours. He drives me mental." Luke giggled at that and tugged the grass softly. "Muscles being Ash?" He asked and Michael nodded. The boy hummed, ”Ash would be glad."

Michael nodded again and suddenly Luke remembered something from when he and Ashton were younger and couldn't help but giggle. The sound had struck Michael's heart and he awed at the giggling boy. "What's funny?" Michael asked with a smile and Luke looked up.

"Just something I remembered. Nothing important." Luke said softly- still grinning and Michael just smiled fondly.

"You should never stop laughing Luke."

Luke looked up at the boy, fingers abandoning the grass as he crossed them over his knees. He placed his chin on his arms and eyed the blue haired boy. "You're a good person Luke. A really good person." Luke's heart was beating relentlessly at his words and Michael didn't tear his eyes away from Luke's. 

"You shouldn't either Mikey." Luke replied simply not knowing how to handle his words right now because his feelings were everywhere. Michael smiled at Luke and Luke smiled back.

Both boys were left with yearning hearts.


	15. A Night Out

Michael looked out of his window. It was clear that there was tension between Luke and his boyfriend. There was something off about the whole thing but Michael didn't want to jump to conclusions yet.

Michael decided that Luke deserved to have some fun. He had never seen that boy leave the house, not once since their late night encounter. So he was gonna take the boy out to a club. Of course, Calum was gonna tag along but Michael could easily ignore him when needed. 

He decided to leave his hair in the messy style since he couldn't be bothered to attempt to tame it and anyway it didn't look that bad. Fuck what Calum thought, Luke never complained. He wore his classic black jeans, a nice t-shirt and a bomber jacket; opting for boots instead of his vans. He put on some bracelets and ran a hand through his hair, popping some gum in his mouth and then smiled in the mirror.

"Cal! I'm leaving now, hurry up!" 

Soon enough, Calum came into the room fully dressed with a smirk. "Let's go get your man." Michael only rolled his eyes.

***

The older of the two friends knocked on the door whilst Calum stood behind him, sucking on a lollipop. Michael didn't even know where that was from. He could see a figure behind the door and soon it opened and Michael wanted to groan. It wasn't Luke.

"Oh, wasn't expecting you." Alex said, narked off and Michael rolled his eyes. "We're going to a club and thought Luke might want to join."

Alex eyed the two boys at his doorstep and that's when Michael noticed another person in the house.

"Calum? Michael?"

Ashton joined Alex, pushing him to the side. "What are you guys doing here?"

Michael noticed the man roll his eyes angrily before walking away, probably going to look for Luke. "We were going to a club and thought Luke would like to come, you're invited too." Calum said grinning and Ashton smiled.

"Great! Luke hasn't been out in ages."

Michael frowned at the information but it soon disappeared when he heard Luke's soft voice from inside the house.

"Luke! We're going out tonight!" Ashton shouted before looking at the two friends and slamming the door shut with a quick smile.

***

Luke saw the look in Alex's eyes, Alex didn't want him to go.

"I don't feel too good." Luke lied. Ashton shook his head, dismissing his rejection. 

"You're coming with me whether you like it or not, you never go out anyway." He said glaring at Alex and the man glared back just as mad.

Luke witnessed their actions and walked towards Alex, placing a hand around his waist. "It's okay I'm not going." Luke whispered to his boyfriend hoping he'd calm down and Alex looked down at Luke smiling. 

"I know baby." He said kissing Luke and Luke knew Ashton would hate his boyfriend more.

"No he's going. I don't give a fuck what you say." His best friend seethed and took Luke's hand.

Alex glared at Ashton. "No he said he doesn't want to go."

"Like you give a fuck, you just want him trapped here with you. I'm taking him out!" He spat. Alex's jaw tightened and Luke hoped his best friend would stop. "Ash please." He said tugging on his hands and Ashton looked down, his eyes softened at the frightened boy.

Luke gingerly walked towards his boyfriend and held his face in his hands, "I won't go if you don't want me too. But we could go together, it'd be good for us."

Alex still didn't want to go. He knew that Michael fancied Luke. He didn't want anyone's eyes on his boy tonight or ever.

But nonetheless he said yes and Luke's eyes lit up in disbelief. 

"Fan-fucking-tasting!" Ashton exclaimed, his anger directed to the older man. But Luke couldn't care, he hadn't been out to a club in forever. He hardly went anywhere other than the grocery store, pharmacy the occasional post office and gas station. And Michael was gonna be there. Michael was a great friend, Luke enjoyed the time they spent together.

"Thank you." He whispered pressing a soft kiss on Alex's lips. "I'm gonna go get dressed."

Alex nodded grimly and watched the blond walk away.

Ashton had picked an outfit and Luke felt hot for once. After some persuasion, Ashton had managed to get Luke to wear his old lip ring again. The blond had on normal black jeans and a maroon shirt. Ash told him to leave some of the buttons undone and then Luke decided to gel his hair smiling in the mirror.

He hadn't felt this good in ages, yes, he felt a bit uncomfortable wearing the foreign articles of clothing but he wasn't complaining. He licked his lips, tongue prodding the metal ring and Luke smiled in pure happiness. 

Pulling on his boots, he went down to see Alex had gotten dressed too. Alex turned around and his eyes roamed Luke's body. 

He wrapped an arm around Luke's waist and whispered, "Fuck, you look hot baby."

Luke blushed and Alex's hold tightened. "Can't wait to fuck you." He said breathily and Luke fidgeted under his gaze. 

Alex flicked the ring on his lips and Luke gulped nervously but Alex didn't say anything so Luke smiled happily. Soon, Ashton joined them and Luke felt the excitement build. It was actually about to happen.

***

Luke had noticed the way Michael's eyes widened slightly and he blushed a deep red. The curly haired boy played with the ring on his lips anxiously during the car ride. The arm Alex had around him was firm and Luke felt slightly uncomfortable.

It was a relief to be out of the stuffy car and as he was lead into the club he suddenly felt scared. Swallowing back his fear, he looked around in awe. People. So many different, beautiful people dancing and drinking and laughing. The coloured lights dimmed the club and Luke instinctively shuffled closer towards Alex.

"Let's get a few drinks." Calum suggested and the group nodded. Luke didn't want to drink so he asked for a coke instead and sat down at the counter. Michael sat beside him and Alex on the other. Ash and Cal were chatting to one another and Luke smiled to himself. Hopefully, things between them both would work out.

"Wanna dance with me Luke?" Michael offered and Luke looked up at Alex. Alex pecked the skin under his ears and Luke nodded. The unknown emotion in Michael's eyes faded slightly at Luke's response and soon Luke was pulled onto the dance floor. 

Luke had forgotten how to dance and stood there awkwardly. "I can't dance for shit so don't mind me." Michael said a slight blush on his cheek and Luke smiled. "Me too."

But Luke was so wrong. He thought he had forgotten but his body clearly hadn't as his hips moved in time to the beat. So many eyes were on him but only Michael's mattered as he stared at Luke in a daze and took his chance stepping closer. 

"You're a great dancer." He whispered into Luke's ears and Luke was suddenly aware of the close proximity of the two. He let out a breath and despite trying to avoid Michael's green eyes he couldn't and soon he was under his spell. Luke bit his lip, an old habit of his and Michael's eyes followed darkening slightly. 

Luke suddenly felt guilty and sad and he took a shaky step back. Michael's brows furrowed in confusion and worry and Luke shot him a small smile. 

"I'm going to look for Alex." He said and Michael's eyes revealed the heartbreak. 

The blue haired boy nodded stiffly, "I wanted to buy a few more drinks."

The two boys walked silently to the bar the noises of the club doing anything but distracting them from the moment earlier.


	16. Broken Boundaries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: Sexual Assault

Alex was drunk. Luke could smell the alcohol as soon as he was pulled into Alex's body. But Alex was happy to see the boy and Luke didn't want to ruin his mood. Michael sat a few seats behind, watching the pair sourly. 

Luke had been pulled onto Alex's lap and Alex was nipping at the skin on Luke's neck. Luke squirmed and wrapped an arm around him. 

The anger and jealousy coursed through the blood in Michael's veins and he ordered another and another drink. But Luke was unaware.

"Love you so much baby." Alex said and Luke nodded a huge smile on his pink lips. "Me too Alex."

The older man joined their lips together and Luke cringed at the taste of alcohol. He deepened the kiss and Luke wanted to pull away, it felt wrong. And Michael was here. But Alex had a grip on Luke's thigh that would be hard to remove so Luke threw his arms around the older man’s neck and kissed him back. Alex was kissing him with so much passion that Luke couldn't help but feel giddy. 

Pulling away, Luke let out a huge breath and rested his head on Alex's. His boyfriend smirked at him; Luke couldn't help himself from feeling embarrassed. He slipped off the man’s lap and returned to his seat. Luke's blue eyes drank Michael in, noticing his foggy eyes and the cup he had in his hand. He was drunk too.

Luke sighed and watched Michael walk off into the crowd and was met with a grinning Ashton. 

"He kissed me Lu!" Ashton exclaimed, overjoyed and Luke grinned. "Calum?" 

"He fancies me!" The boy squealed and Luke giggled at his best friend. "I knew it."

Ashton looked around and frowned, "Where's Michael?"

Luke shrugged sadly, "He's gone off to dance I think."

The hazel eyed boy only nodded and took Luke's hand, "I never got to dance with you. Come on, it'll be fun!"

Luke couldn't deny his best friend so he followed him onto the floor. Ashton started dancing crazily pulling on Luke's hand to join. He was completely bizarre but Luke joined in, loving the new feelings in his body. This whole experience was exhilarating and Luke hoped he could do it again soon sometime. 

After a few songs, Luke wanted to get a drink and Ashton let him go. But Luke saw something he wished he hadn't. Michael was with another boy, dancing too close to be just friends. The boy had light hair and was the same height as Michael and suddenly they were kissing up against the wall. Luke's eyes teared up and he didn't know why, Michael and Luke were just friends.

The feeling in Luke's heart wasn't foreign, he had felt it before. All those nights, Alex had come home late after spending the night elsewhere. Luke wasn't stupid, he knew what his boyfriend had been doing. That's how Michael was making him feel. The two weren't even together but he felt so betrayed when seeing the blue haired boy with someone else.

Luke felt his stomach drop and he felt sick. His head spun and suddenly he felt unloved. He was upset and mad and slightly jealous and he didn't know why. Arms wrapped around his waist and he jumped, turning to meet the eyes of a stranger. 

"I've got a boyfriend." He rushed out before leaving in a hurry. He could still feel the strangers arms on his waist and his eyes stung. Luke didn't check where he was going and bumped into someone. The blond was gonna burst into tears until he heard a familiar voice.

"Hey Lukey." 

Warm, brown eyes looked at Luke and he felt safe. 

"Hi Calum." 

The half drunk boy smiled and wrapped an arm around Luke catching him off guard, "You smell nice. Where's Ashton?"

Luke didn't understand how he changed the topic so fast but decided not to question it since he was half gone to the alcohol. "He's dancing."

Calum let go from the embrace and smiled widely, "Where's Michael? You shouldn't be by yourself."

"Michael's with someone else." Luke said and Calum frowned, his lips in a pout. "But he said-" The Maori took a long sigh and shook his head. "Urgh, he's confusing." Calum rubbed his eyes and turned around to leave.

"Wait!" Luke called out catching his attention again. "Where's Alex?"

But Calum was already gone.

Luke feared he would never find Alex again and that he would be left all alone again but suddenly he spotted him at the bar. Luke walked up to the man not having a clue what he would say but clearly he had nothing to say because as soon as he reached the man, he kissed him hard.

Alex was caught off guard but recovered quickly as he wrapped his arms tightly around the blue eyed boy. Luke would never have the bravery to do this in public but he felt like a train wreck after seeing Michael and now he didn't know what to do.

"Calm down baby boy." Alex smirked and Luke couldn't stop himself. He just wanted to forget Michael and everything that came with him because it was too much for him to handle. He just wanted to go back to before, when he didn't doubt his love for Alex.

Luke pulled Alex off the chair and soon they were in a darker part of the club. Luke didn't even want this but he needed it to help him forget. 

Alex had Luke pushed up against a wall, tongues tangled together. Luke gasped when Alex pushed himself onto Luke's crotch. Alex wanted Luke badly. 

The man trailed down Luke's neck leaving behind marks and a breathless Luke. "Like that baby boy?" The man questioned and Luke could only breathlessly nod.

Luke had no idea that a pair of broken, green eyes were trained on him from the corner of the club.

Alex grinded against Luke and Luke moaned feeling love and desire stirring in his chest. 

"I love you." He gasped and Alex grunted.

Luke pulled the man closer and rolled his head back but then Alex's hand travelled down south tugging at Luke's button. They were in public and this was too far for Luke; Alex should have stopped.

"We can't do this here." He breathed pushing Alex gently away. 

Alex groaned and let his hand travel down. 

"Alex stop." Luke whined and Alex carried on, hushing the boy.

"Please Alex, people are here." Luke pleaded but Alex only held a finger to his lips as his other hands carried on what they were doing. 

Luke carried on pretending that he enjoyed Alex's hand down his trousers when in reality it left him emotionless. He hadn't realised that tears had dropped until Alex kissed his wet cheeks removing his hand. 

"You're so fucking hot Luke." He groaned and Luke could only nod in the darkness of the room.

***

The green eyes had since moved on and now they were focused on a crushed can of soda lying on the edge of the sidewalk. Michael's eyes were blurred from the tears and he just wanted to go home.

This was exactly why he became numb to emotion, it could leave you breathless at one time and with a broken heart the next. Michael hated how easily Luke could affect him but he hated more how he set himself up for it right from the beginning. Falling for someone like Luke was one thing but falling for a taken heart was just another mistake and Michael let the tears flow as he staggered around praying that he'd find his way home soon.


	17. Betrayal and Blood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's some violence, not too extreme. Should I provide a warning every time there is? Would you want that?

Michael had been awake for a few hours now and his head was still an aching mess. He groaned at his reflection and decided to take a warm shower to forget the night before. Stepping into the warm water was soothing and Michael sighed in comfort.

He couldn't erase last night's events from his mind. Alex didn't deserve Luke. Luke deserved better. Fuck, Michael wasn't any better but he was an upgrade from Alex.

Luke looked so fucking hot yesterday and Michael couldn't take his eyes off him. He thought back to their dance and how Luke's lips were tugged behind his teeth; blue eyes filled with curiosity and innocence.

Michael was jealous of Alex. Alex lived with the boy and slept beside him. Alex could kiss the boy whenever and was the main person in Luke's life. Fuck, yesterday Michael had seen the way Luke's face twisted in pleasure and Michael could feel himself get turned on.

Michael thought of all the things he could do to the innocent boy and groaned in the shower. Luke was fucking with his brain but Michael was getting pleasured by it, he couldn't seem to stop.

"Fuck Luke." He moaned, back pressed against the cold shower wall. Luke invaded every inch of his mind, he was the cause of his pleasure and Michael had never felt so much desire for someone in his life.

Turning the shower off, he stepped out into the cool air and realised how fucked he was for falling for the bruised angel.

***

Luke shouted at Alex in anger when he saw him pack bags. The boy knew his lover was going to spend some time with someone else.

Wasn't Luke ever enough? Luke never did anything to anger him on purpose. He was always trapped and forced to stay at home when he shouldn't have been. Luke couldn't hold onto his sanity anymore. Not only was his body newly bruised but the old bruises on his heart never seemed to recover.

Alex had had sex with Luke again and the blond was tired of feeling like a toy. He was just taken advantage of he never had a say in anything. He was so tired.

"Don't go. I didn't do anything wrong." Luke whimpered and Alex sighed in irritation.

"I didn't say you fucking did, I just need to go on a work trip."

"Stop lying." Luke cried, "I know where you're going Alex."

The man growled and pushed Luke up against the wall, a tight hold on his bony wrists.

"Fucking stop Luke. You're not a baby, I'm going for work- so shut that pretty mouth of yours before I really lose it."

Luke cried and cried.

"Stop lying Alex. You're a liar! You don't love me, otherwise you wouldn't leave to spend nights with him! What is it that I don't do? I do everything thing for you!" He yelled, releasing some of his anger, "Every little thing I do to keep you happy. You never care for me, you don't even check to see if I've eaten or where I am! You're an ungrateful boyfriend, I hate you!"

The force of Alex's hand was strong enough to throw Luke onto the cold floor. Rough kicks were given to his stomach and face: Luke's nose started to bleed heavily. His clumped hair- messily thrown over his eyes and he sat up, closing in on himself.

"I hate you, you fucking ungrateful whore! You're secretly meeting with that blue haired freak and fucking him! Don't think I haven't seen his eyes on you. You've probably taken that friend of yours to bed too!" He seethed spitting on Luke, "I look after your fucking ass and gave you this home and my love! I don't need you!"

Luke burst into more tears, his chest in pain from crying so much. No matter what, Luke loved Alex; Luke needed Alex and Alex hated him now.

Alex was right, he is ungrateful if he didn't have the man then Luke wouldn't be here. The blond picked himself up from the ground groaning in immense pain. The blood from his nose was dropping everywhere, making the kitchen look like a horrible crime scene and Luke couldn't see from his tears.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I d-don't hate you, I love you A-Alex. I didn't mean it, I promise!" Luke hiccuped.

Luke knew what was gonna come but still didn't expect it as he fell back onto the ground, head banging onto the tiles of the kitchen floor. Luke's head ringed and the metallic smell of the blood invaded his senses.

"Stay on the fucking ground, bitch." Alex seethed causing the sobs to rattle through Luke's weak body.

"Don't go! Don't leave me!" He cried, fear seizing his delicate heart but Alex didn't give him a second thought.

Luke was a helpless case. He was extremely weak and fatigued and passed out soon enough. 

***

Hours had gone by and Luke was still a shivering mess on the floor. The blood had stopped running and had eventually dried out but Luke was too tired to do anything. He couldn't even cry.

He just wanted Alex back, how could he say he hated him? He could never stop loving the man. Luke felt sick and knew that his only cure had left.

From his spot on the ground, he stared at their empty house. It could never be seen as home in Luke's eyes. There was no personal touches. No photos, certificates or frames hung up.

Luke realised how empty and lifeless this relationship really was but there was no stopping him from craving it because he had nothing else for him. Even Michael had been ripped out of his life.

The phone rang and Luke left it ringing. His stomach growled but Luke shrugged it off. His body was stiff from lying on the floor but he was dirty and didn't want to move, so he kept his space on the ground and hoped that he could just die.

He felt a bit lightheaded and put his head down hoping the feeling would wear off soon.


	18. Amnesia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave comments, I love reading them!

Luke had finally managed to stand up but he still had his bloody clothes on; the crimson stains had dried on the floor. Luke stumbled upstairs and tugged off his ruined clothes, leaving him in only boxers as he slipped under the duvets.

He had been in bed all day, the phone had rang many times but Luke didn't move a muscle. He didn't know who it was and didn't have enough will in him too care.

When was Alex gonna be back? He thought.

Luke hugged himself and cried at the faint smell of Alex in their bed. His cologne still lingered in the sheets and it overwhelmed Luke's senses. He just wanted to start it all over again.

Luke was sure his heart had gone through too much, it must have broken now. He rushed out the room, arriving just in time to the sink. He emptied his stomach. Luke hadn't eaten anything since last night so the burning from the bile was discomforting and instead of wishing for help, Michael popped into his mind. Michael had helped him before and never judged. Alex never helped Luke when he was in states like these and the guilt inside him was so immense he felt his chest contract tightly as he held back the tears.

The sad boy cleaned his face, brushed his teeth and pulled on Alex's shirt. It was huge on his small frame and he got into some old, grey sweats. He just wanted to get some water. Luke hesitated as he walked by the phone and couldn't stop himself as he dialled the only number he knew.

"Alex?" He whimpered and he fell against the wall at the sound of the man.

"What do you want Luke?" He asked harshly and Luke wished he had put his heart in a box to protect it.

"I-I, Alex-" Luke stopped and forced himself to take a breath. "Please come back. Miss you."

Alex's irritation wasn't hard to miss and Luke felt even worse. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't h-have called." He hiccuped and put the phone down. But the phone rang again, straight away, startling Luke.

"Luke stop crying." The man spat roughly through the line, before cutting the call.

The small boy walked down the corridor into the dark room. The only light that leaked in was through the curtains and Luke curled up on the arm chair, a clear view of the outside world. The light patters of the rain could be heard and Luke's mind went for a walk.

His heart craved to see Michael again. And get help. Luke's body was still aching and the blood on his hands and lips wasn't hard to ignore. He knew he looked like a mess but he didn't have the strength to physically care anymore. Alex had also taken Luke's sanity when he left.

***

Michael watched as a panicked Ashton knocked on Luke's door. His hair and clothes were soaking wet in the rain but he still knocked relentlessly as he tried to peer in through the windows. Ashton rummaged through his pockets and then the plants outside. He was on the wet soil, ruining his jeans but Michael could see that Ash didn't really care about the welfare of his trousers.

Suddenly, he stopped moving and stared at something. Michael obviously couldn't see what was in his hands but Ashton stood up in a rush and soon enough unlocked the door and slipped into the warm house.

The pale boy looked away sadly and with a lot of thought he decided that any chance of being with the blue eyed beauty was tarnished. He couldn't harm him more.

Michael's green eyes were fixed on the flowers that Luke had dug in the other day. They were beautiful. Like the boy himself and suddenly a flood of emotions broke the dam he had built. Michael was crazy about Luke. He had to be.

Michael hadn't been in a relationship since he was 15 and that was just a blur to him. He didn't get to know people. He used people to help forget things. Michael just had sex and left. He destroyed so many people. He'd been a complete bitch to Calum for a year until he decided to give up. Calum had told him that he wasn't going to leave and he stuck to his words. Michael was too weak- but this time he had to be strong. For Luke. Michael needed to bring himself to approach the vulnerable boy but someone else had already taken the position he wanted and Michael was scared.

He harshly shut the curtains and felt congested in his own home so he did what he was used to do. Michael went to the bar.

***

He didn't know how many drinks he had drunk, it was enough to make him forget his name. He sat on the bar and reached out for another when his hands bumped into someone. He glared at the person and was met with a sad boy. It was clear he was drunk too. His hair a mess and his eyes bloodshot, Michael knew he himself looked similar and winced.

"What's up with you?" The boy asked and Michael shrugged. "We're all here for the same reasons."

The boy slumped at that and grabbed a bottle, "To forget someone. A girlfriend? Boyfriend?"

Michael shook his head laughing insanely, "He's got a boyfriend."

"Well shit." The stranger groaned before taking a swig from his bottle, he passed it to Michael.

"He thinks they're in love when they're fucking not." Michael growled drunk and the stranger hummed.

"I'm in love. But he's a cheater." He said simply and Michael nodded.

"Luke's hurt." Michael mumbled and the boy frowned.

"I saw him with bruises and blood. He hates me now." Michael said simply. But inside he was a whirlwind of emotions, alcohol and tears.

The stranger moved closer to Michael and soon was on his lap. Michael didn't move him because he knew what he was gonna do. Michael did it all the time.

"Help me forget." The stranger breathed and Michael didn't waste a second pressing their lips together.


	19. Panic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's not the best. Sorry.

Calum's voice was loud and angry but mostly sounded sad. Michael hadn't showered and he had been drinking all week. The scene was too familiar to Calum and he didn't want his best friend to slip away.

"Why don't you just talk to me Michael? I love you, you idiot." Calum asked and Michael suddenly burst into tears shocking the Maori boy.

"Oh Michael." Calum sighed, wrapping himself around the boy and Michael did so too. His grip tight as he cried into his best friends neck.

"There's something wrong with Luke."

"He had bruises that day and then he's always scared of something, I'm not stupid. His boyfriend's a controlling prick and now he's gone somewhere and Ashton appears like a mad man."

Calum rubbed his friends back reassuringly, "What about you Michael? I want to know about my crazy best friend. Why are you so sad all the time?"

Michael cried more. "I love you Cal."

Calum smiled widely despite feeling upset for his friend. "I love you too bro."

The dark haired boy pulled away and looked at Michael, "You need to go shower. I'll leave your clothes out and then we'll talk, yeah?"

Michael nodded and got off the couch for something else other than alcohol for the first time in days.

***

Luke had become a ghost. He had stopped doing nearly everything. Alex had been gone for longer than a week and Luke feared he wouldn't come back. But he also feared for the boy across the road. He hardly saw Michael, just once: when he came back with beer. Michael was struggling too. They could've helped each other, Luke thought. But he couldn't go back to Michael. Otherwise he'd end up yearning for more and he couldn't have that.

The sudden knock at the door frightened him. It wasn't Alex, Luke knew that. It was probably Ashton.

Luke cared the slightest for his appearance and opened the door, heart stopping at the sight of Michael. He went to slam the door but Michael was fast and strong and held the door open.

"Stop it Luke."

Luke stepped back in fright and Michael noticed immediately. He also noticed the dark bags on his pale skin and the red, tear stained cheeks. Luke's T-shirt hung off his skinny body and his sweatpants were huge. He had been neglecting himself.

"What happened?" He asked carefully and Luke shook his head refusing to tell.

"You can't trap yourself away, where's Alex?"

Luke's response was frightening and Michael didn't know what to do when the boy fell to the ground in a fit.

"Luke? Luke, breathe!" He panicked and bent down to pick the boy from the ground. Michael wanted to cry at the sight of the boy but also his weight. He was so skinny and light- it was like holding a feather.

The blue haired boy kicked the door shut and peered into the living room frowning at the half empty glass of water on the table and the blanket on the couch. The curtains were closed, Luke had been staying there.

Michael decided to go upstairs and found his way to the main room where he assumed Luke slept. His eyes widened at the old clothes on the floor and his heart stopped when he saw the dark, dried blood.

How long had that been there?

Michael placed the boy on the bed and felt his temperature. He was alarmed at the high fever the boy held. Michael looked around in a panic and decided to take his trousers off because it'd be easier than his top. But the sight of his legs pained Michael. They were insanely skinny and instead of skin, dark bruises were everywhere.

Michael's eyes watered and he tried hard to ignore the tears as he bent down to pick up the dirty clothes. His mind a mess as he thought of possibilities to explain the blood.

"Mikey?" A small voice asked and the blue haired boy turned around in an instant dropping the clothes.

Luke's eyes were trained on Michael and the older boy mustered a smile. "How do you feel?"

The blond thought for a bit and shrugged before he sat up making Michael rush to his side.

"Let's get some food in you." He said and Luke shook his head no, "Not hungry." He looked down and flushed covering his legs up.

"Who did that?" Michael asked and Luke shrugged.

"Does Alex know? He'd be angry." Michael said and Luke looked away. The penny dropped and it all fell into pieces in Michael's mind.

The scared looks; controlling boyfriend; bruised body; sad eyes. It was Alex.

Luke saw the realisation dawn in Michael's green eyes and he shook his head, tears falling everywhere as Michael's jaws clenched. His knuckles white, face red and Luke was scared.

There was a newfound fire growing in Michael's cold eyes. Luke moved away from the enraged boy and that's when the older snapped out of it, looking down at the frightened angel.

They held eyes and an exchange of emotions occurred between the two. "You know I'd never hurt you, ever."

Luke stayed silent and Michael understood that he would need more than a few words to believe him. Michael's fingers hesitantly rose to touch the bruises on top of Luke's eyebrows; the sudden action made the younger flinch. "Can I see it?" Michael asked softly and Luke nodded slowly.

Michael's touch was soft as he brushed back Luke's tangled hair to inspect the damage. Michael was fuming, he wanted to break something, hurt someone, hurt him. But he knew he had to stay in control in front of Luke. He was too fragile and vulnerable to the abuse and Michael would kill himself if he scared the pretty boy further away.

***

"You have to eat something." Michael pleaded but Luke shook his head, tired and sad. Michael had carried him downstairs into the main room and opened the curtains and Luke had been looking out of the window since. Michael knew who he was looking for and it hurt that the damned man was still Luke's centre of attention. It should've been Michael.

The green eyed boy looked through the cupboards and decided to make Luke some soup because he didn't know what else to do and because it was easy. It always helped Calum when he was sick.

The warm soup had long gone cold on the table in front of Luke and Michael sighed sadly.

"Luke where is he?" He asked quietly and Luke had a distant look in his eyes as he spoke. "I don't know. He left me and I don't know how long."

Suddenly he looked at Michael, eyes wide in terror. "What if he never comes back?" Luke whispered, the words that had been haunting him for days were finally spoken out loud and Michael didn't know what to say to comfort the boy.


	20. Late Nights and Questions

Michael walked up the familiar pathway to Luke's house and knocked once, knowing that there was a chance that he wouldn't open it. Michael had knocked yesterday and Luke didn't appear so he had left knowing that the boy was watching him through the window on the same couch he had left him on. Michael didn't know what to do.

"Luke please." Michael begged. He couldn't just leave again. His mind was going crazy, he needed to know Luke was alright but there was still no answer. With his head down, Michael forced the tears to stay back and then he walked away. As soon as he stepped into his home, he erupted and punched the wall: leaving a slight dent and a lot of blood on his knuckles. The pain was raw and the blood was bright and he punched again and again, imagining it was the man who had ruined Luke's life.

Soon, there was a lot of blood on the floor and instead of feeling satisfied, Michael just felt empty.

The day had been wasted and Michael went out again into the cold night for Luke. His phone rang in his pocket and he read the caller ID only to put it away when seeing Calum's name.

"Luke!" He called, "Open the door!"

***

The two boys were sat cross legged on the grass in Luke's garden. Luke wearing Michael's sweater because Michael feared he'd catch a cold.

Luke was staring at the stars silently and Michael stared at the beautiful boy beside him. Luke was so insanely beautiful and not just as a person. Michael was sure Luke was an actual angel. He just looked so perfect under the moonlight, Michael had goosebumps. The wind ruffled Luke's blond hair and Michael smiled to himself.

"Why do you love him?" He asked suddenly and Luke turned to face him.

"Alex?" He asked and Michael nodded making Luke sigh.

"He loves me." Luke said simply. Michael wanted more.

"But he hurts you. That's not love."

Luke looked away, "Our relationship was always a bit weird but I think we've both forgotten how to love."

Michael nodded sadly, "Why don't you leave Luke?"

The boy uncrossed his legs and held them to his chest. "He promised he'd change and I believed him because I love him. He did for a bit but he got drunk and forgot his promises. It was too late to leave, I've got no one else."

"That isn't love Luke."

Luke looked at Michael, the moonlight making his crazed eyes look bright like crystals, "What is love, Mikey?! I haven't felt it in years."

He fell against the older boy in tears and Michael rocked him comfortingly.

"Don't cry Luke."

The bruised boy wiped his tears, remaining in Michael's embrace. "Who do you love Mikey?" He sniffed and Michael slightly froze at the question.

"I-It doesn't matter." Michael decided, "He's got someone else."

"Oh." Luke said sadly. "If you love him you should fight for him."

Michael nodded wishing that he could tell Luke that it was him. No one had ever affected Michael like Luke had.

"I don't know what love is either." Michael confessed, "I haven't loved someone in years except for Cal."

"You should find someone Mikey. You deserve to be loved." Luke said quietly, despite knowing he'd envy Michael's lover.

"So do you. You see so much beauty in this small place- with this shit life Luke. You deserve more."

Luke nodded listening to Michael's words. There was silence between the two boys and Michael could feel tension, he wondered if Luke could feel it too.

Luke brushed his fingers over Michael's knuckles softly frowning at the bruises. "Stop hurting yourself."

Michael just nodded.

***

Luke felt a bit lighter as he woke up but the nagging pain in his heart still overruled. He forced himself out of bed and got dressed in a T-shirt and some sweats before going down. There was nothing to do, so Luke dwelled on Alex's absence waiting for the blue haired boy to knock on the door and invite himself into Luke's life. Brightening it a little and blurring the edges so Luke could breathe again.

"Why don't we go out today?" Michael asked, "It'd be good to take your mind off things."

Luke simply said no like Michael expected. What if he calls today? Luke thought.

Michael frowned and looked around the dull room, something catching his eye. He stood up and walked over to it whilst Luke remained unaware.

"Who's is this?" Michael asked and Luke blushed when he saw his guitar.

"It's mine." Luke said quietly and Michael's eyes brightened.

"You play?! Wow Luke, that's cool!" Michael said excitedly, it brought a small smile on Luke's lips.

"Ash plays drums." Luke said intriguing the older boy. "I used to always watch him play and then one day he brought a guitar. I thought it was for him but he said he got it for me."

Michael nodded at Luke's words and strummed the strings. The sound vibrated through the room and both boys winced. "I'm not very good."

"It's not you. It's out of tune." Luke said and Michael smiled at Luke's interaction.

"Will you play for me?" He asked and Luke blushed. "Used to play for Alex." He said sadly, "He likes my singing."

Michael's eyes dimmed at the mention of the man but he knew that Alex was still an important part of Luke's life. He couldn't do anything about it.

"Can you teach me?" Michael asked seeing Luke's hesitation, "If you teach me something, I can teach you something." He offered and Luke looked up curiously.

"What will you teach me?" He asked and Michael thought. There wasn't anything remotely interesting he could do and one idea popped into his mind but he didn't know if he should. Michael wasn't entirely proud or open about his artwork but Luke was stepping out of his comfort zone so it was only fair Michael did too. And he was so desperate to spend as much time as he could with Luke.

"Umm...wanna learn some drawing?"


	21. Wrong Feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sweet and emotional chapter. Thank you for reading <3

Michael rubbed his sweaty palms on his jeans as he waited for Luke. Soon, the blonde was standing awkwardly at the door. He had made an effort today: wearing black jeans and a dark blue T-shirt. His skin had a glow to it and his lip ring was on. Michael was captured and couldn't help but feel the urge to press their lips together; wanting to feel the cold metal against his lips.

"Hi." Luke squeaked and Michael grinned. "Excited for today?" He asked and Luke shook his head, "I'm not great at drawing."

The older laughed and stepped back allowing Luke to enter his home and close the door. "Drawing is art Luke. There's no right or wrong you just let yourself go."

Luke nodded and timidly followed the boy in front of him. Michael knew that Luke was hesitant to leave his house but didn't know that it was because Luke eagerly spent his days waiting for a call.

Michael lead the way upstairs and opened his room door. It wasn't anything special but Luke was in awe. He took small steps towards the best part of Michael's room- well that's what Michael thought.

The wall was covered in posters and posters of bands and album covers that Michael and Calum adored and Luke got emotional as he thought back to the days Ashton and him would spend nights listening to their favourite albums and just talk.

"What do you think?" Michael asked awkwardly and Luke turned around to face the boy. "I love it."

Michael grinned so wide Luke couldn't help but smile too which made the green eyed boy fall further into his feelings for Luke.

The older boy walked around his room whilst Luke took it in. The dark blue nearly black walls were somewhat comforting and the stacks of CD's in the corner intrigued Luke. There were so many different pencils, paints and brushed sprawled on Michael's table and Luke looked at the busy boy. Who was he really?

Michael looked up to see the boy and blushed fiercely when he noticed Luke was already looking.

***

Michael's drawing were amazing; Luke was star struck. Instead of drawing, the two boys were sat on the ground, all the drawings and paintings Michael had done were sprawled out around the pair and Luke spent his time admiring each one. This wasn't what Michael had in mind for the afternoon but he wasn't complaining. Seeing the little sparks in Luke's eyes was way more fascinating and beautiful than any piece of art Michael could ever do.

Luke had noticed that Michael had a few papers hidden away and he tapped Michael's knee.

"Can I see those?" He asked pointing to the folder and Michael looked away embarrassed.

"They're not good." Michael mumbled and Luke refused that for an answer.

"There's no right or wrong." Luke said simply and a small smile found it's way on Michael's lips. Luke remembered what Michael had said earlier.

Michael looked at the folder hesitantly, what would Luke say? Taking a breath he passed the blue folder, what did he have to lose?

Luke's fingers delicately held the papers. His eyes widening, at the images. Michael watched Luke intensely to see if he could read his thoughts but the boy remained blank. He looked at all the drawings, and suddenly his eyes watered and Michael's chest tightened.

He took the papers off Luke and pushed them under his bed.

"I'm sorry I didn't want you to know." He said quietly.

Luke's lack of response worried Michael and then he felt sick. A thousand thoughts invaded his mind and there was one big question he couldn't seem to ignore.

Would Luke hate him?

Michael looked down at his knees bitterly, fingers fumbling together. He always made fucking mistakes and he hated it. Fuck him and his drawings.

Luke's eyes scanned the sheets before looking at the boy, "It's.."

Michael panicked and stood up, "It's wrong I know I'm sorry."

"No, it's-" Luke paused and Michael looked at him desperately.

"I'm sorry." Michael rushed out, "If you don't like it I'll get rid of it right now."

He bent down and rummaged under his bed frantically wanting to rip the papers to shreds and burn them. The tender boy noticed his frustration and reached out, holding him softly by the elbows. Michael's heart nearly leaped out of his chest.

"Stop. It's beautiful." Luke said quietly, "No one's ever done anything like that for me ever. I love it so much Michael."

The green eyed boy looked down at the boy stunned and felt relief run through him. He gingerly sat down and Luke looked at the boy curiously.

"But why? What's so special about me? Why draw me?" He asked tears running down his pink cheeks.

"Everything Luke." Michael whispered and Luke looked at the boy through his tears.

Michael shamefully looked down and Luke gasped. Michael heard the soft sound and clenched his eyes shut.

"You d-don't-" Luke stopped for a breath but Michael already knew what he was asking and he nodded weakly.

"You can't!" He said in a panic, "Alex- he'll hate you! He'll hate me!" He exclaimed in fright and all Michael could do was watch the boy sadly.

It wasn't Michael's fault he fell for the beautiful boy. Luke was what Michael had been craving to fix his stained soul.

The younger boy scrambled away and Michael's heart cracked. "Don't go." Michael said pathetically and Luke looked at the sad boy.

Michael held onto Luke's hands but Luke tugged them away, he didn't want to hurt the boy but he had to go. Luke wouldn't be able to forget the sadness growing in Michael's eyes so he ran downstairs and out of the house. Sobs clogging his sore throat.

He heard Michael cry out his name and for a split second he wanted to run back and hold the boy dearly, comforting him and healing his pain. Luke wanted to fix the pieces one by one until Michael's heart was beating again but he couldn't because he already had a broken heart that needed to be tended to.

Guess Michael really did have a lot to lose.


	22. Bad Man

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment more :)

Luke groaned and tried to stretch but froze. He sensed the presence of someone and felt an arm around his waist. 

He turned around and was shocked to see Alex in bed beside him. Luke stared at the man he had fallen in love with years ago. He looked so different while he slept. God, Luke was so happy that Alex was back, he felt like crying. Closing his eyes, the blond moved closer to the man.

"Luke?" A rough voice spoke making him look up shyly. Suddenly, the tears erupted and he clinged onto Alex.

"I'm so sorry." Luke cried and Alex held him tightly. "Stop crying Luke, I'm back now."

Luke nodded and tried to stop. Out of nowhere, Alex kissed Luke and it stunned him, but he kissed back. Luke was still tired and he just wanted to cuddle and talk but Alex wanted this.

Soon, Luke was trapped under Alex as he roamed Luke's body with his cold hands. The younger whimpered at the cold and pushed his boyfriend back. "Not right now." He said quietly, scared of Alex's response but the man pecked his nose and got off.

"Later then, I missed my boy."

Luke nodded and sat up to stretch. It was time to make breakfast, a task that seemed foreign now since he hadn't made breakfast in days.

***

When Michael saw the blue car, his blood instantly began to boil. He was beyond mad and ready to storm over but then remembered yesterday's events. Michael knew he had no place in Luke's life now.

He stumbled back to bed; hiding away, he was so tired of this. The bed was cold, like Michael's heart and he decided he needed to smoke.

The feeling of the stick between his lips was familiar and eased Michael's mind a little. He hadn't spoken to Calum in a while but then stopped himself from picking up the phone. Calum didn't deserve to be burdened with Michael's problems.

Familiar pattering was heard and Michael grimaced at how the weather matched his mood. He thought about all those days he spent with Luke. Black bruises, pained eyes and a shattered heart. Yet, Luke was so strong. Michael hated himself for being weak and not fighting for Luke but he hated himself even more for not being enough for the broken boy.

Michael was never enough for anyone. He was a mistake, a fuck up. Michael realised how much he needed Luke. They both had lost themselves maybe they could help each other find themselves?

The thoughts were getting too much for Michael so he put a CD on, blasting the volume loud enough to block out his feelings. He closed his eyes and thought of better times, a pretty boy and colours.

***

The blue eyed boy lay in bed weak. Alex and Luke were near enough to another argument and Luke knew he wouldn't be able to handle that so he gave in. Now, he was sore and there was slight blood on the bed sheets. Luke wanted love but he didn't want it to be forced.

He wasn't able to cry anymore, he was so sure he was out of tears so he lay there quietly waiting for Alex to come back and hurt him again.

Luke blocked out all sounds as he pretended to enjoy himself. Alex was harsh and rough and Luke hated every second it. He gripped onto the sheets tightly, his breathing intense so he wouldn't cry in pain.

Luke needed a distraction; something to remind him of all the good in the world and the first thing that came to mind was the bright green eyes of Michael.

The sad boy really hated himself for running away from Michael. It seemed that only Michael could cure Luke's sickness because when Luke was with him, nothing else mattered.

***

Ashton watched his best friend stumble down the stairs sadly. Alex had gone out to drink leaving Luke all by himself.

Ashton put two and two together. Luke was finding it slightly difficult to walk; each step making his face contort in pain. The older boy held his hands out for Luke to walk into.

They curled up on the sofa, Luke on Ashton's lap. Luke's eyes were closed as Ashton hummed softly.

"Ash? Do you love Calum?" 

Ashton thought about the brown eyed boy, smiling to himself, "I think I do."

Luke sighed, "I-I'm scared that there's someone else."

Ashton's eyebrows furrowed in confusion, "What do you mean?"

Luke hid his face in his best friends neck, "Michael likes me and I ran away from him." He confessed.

The hazel eyed boy nodded as he listened to his best friend, "How do you feel about that?" He asked.

Luke frowned sadly, "I thought I loved Alex but Michael said that what we have isn't love. Ashton I'm scared, I can't stop thinking about Michael." He whispered and Ashton smiled knowingly.

"Maybe talk to him." The older boy suggested but Luke refused. 

"Luke you can't hide away forever." He said simply; Luke shrugged.

"I've done it for ages.”

***

Michael watched as the car parked itself on the road and he couldn’t stop himself from storming out of his house. He bounded towards the vehicle and Alex noticed him, glaring harshly.

"What the fuck do you want?" He snapped and Michael growled. All the anger inside of him had taken over and Michael couldn’t focus on anything other than the image of bright red blood soiling the man’s skin. Without wasting any time, he threw a punch to Luke’s cruel boyfriend.

The man staggered back and Michael attacked again letting out only a bit of his fury. The bastard deserved to get hurt; even for a second, Michael wanted to hold him accountable for the the suffering in Luke's life. He deserved it. He deserved so much more.

"You're a monster." He roared and Alex gave Michael a menacing look as he wiped the blood spilling out of his mouth. 

"Who told you that, huh!?" Alex spat, aiming for Michael and he didn't miss. Michael's nose flared in anger and he pounced onto Alex both tumbling to the ground. Michael pushed him under and threw punches everywhere receiving a fair amount too.

"Where the fuck were you? He was hurt and you did that! Why the fuck did you come back!?" 

"That bitch! What did he say?!" Alex snarled and Michael saw red. Who was he to call Luke a bitch? Who the fuck did this bastard think he was?

Suddenly, hands grabbed Michael pulling him away and Michael saw Ashton run towards Alex throwing him onto the ground to keep him back.

Michael wiped the blood off of himself, spitting on the ground. He felt Calum's hold on him release before he was harshly spun around. Calum hugged Michael tightly to him, sobbing, and it felt surreal for a second. Everything was on the edge and was fuzzy, like looking at your reflection through a steamed up mirror. 

Michael ran a hand down his face still in a daze and Calum shook him furiously, "What's your problem? We haven't spoken in days and the first time I finally see you, you're in a fight? With him!"

Michael turned around suddenly looking for Luke. His emotions had caught up; Michael was worried sick about the bruised boy but his eyes landed on two people behind him. Luke wasn’t here.

"Where’s Luke?” Michael yelled and Alex glared furiously, "Stay the fuck away from us!"

Michael was ready to pounce on the evil man again but Calum pushed forward, grabbing Alex by the collar of his shirt. Michael looked at Calum thankfully whereas Ashton gawped in surprise and pure shock.

"We'll gladly stay the fuck away from you, but you can't stop him from seeing Luke. Luke doesn't deserve any of this shit." He said through gritted teeth before shoving Alex roughly away. Calum stormed back to Michael's house, the blue haired boy following shortly behind.


	23. A Visitor

Michael sat quietly on the couch as Calum tended to his bruises. The tension in the air was thick. His bruises stung and he hissed making Calum roll his eyes. "That's what you get for involving yourself in shit like that and ignoring me!"

Michael sat in shame as Calum carried on healing him.

"I couldn't help it." Michael admitted, "I saw him and just couldn't control myself. The fucking bastard deserved more."

Calum nodded along, "I know but at least wait for me to have your ass or something. You were ignoring me and then, I see that and just- Michael, don't forget you've got people that care for you. Like me and Luke."

The last two words made Michael blush and Calum poked his best friends cheek grinning.

"Not anymore." Michael said sadly and Calum shook his head. "That's not what Ash says."

Michael's head lifted up eagerly and Calum smirked. "If you wanna know, you gotta ask Luke yourself."

Michael groaned and pushed Calum off trudging up the stairs whilst Calum laughed behind him.

"I'm staying over! Love you!" He said and Michael rolled his eyes, "Fuck you Cal."

Michael heard Calum's exaggerated sigh and the boy yelled, "I'm waiting you ass."

Michael huffed and turned around, grumbling an ‘I love you’ which made Calum smile. Michael smiled secretly too.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang making both boys look curiously at each other. "Who's that?" Calum asked and Michael shrugged walking back down the stairs.

He opened the door surprised to see Ashton standing there awkwardly. He shot Michael a small smile, and the green eyed boy looked at him in confusion.

"This is a lot to ask but do you mind if I stay over tonight?" He asked.

The sound of Ashton's voice must of attracted Calum as he ran towards the curly haired boy. Michael noticed the way Ashton's eyes lit up as Calum ran into his arms.

Michael knew they had a thing but this was more than what he thought but he was beyond happy for Calum. He deserved someone as good as Ashton.

"Uhh, sure." Michael said distracted, his sight was focused on the house across the road. Ashton and Calum noticed and looked sadly at Michael.

"Luke's not doing good right now." Ashton said, "Maybe I can arrange a meet up for the two of you tomorrow?"

Michael looked at Ashton with pleading eyes, he wanted that more than anything. Ashton saw the desperation in his green eyes and nodded simply hoping that tomorrow would be a better day for all.

***

Alex had been cold to Luke all night. Luke knew it was only a matter of time before the storm began; Luke would get the worst of it, like always.

Th man had stormed to their room and slammed the door, clearly telling Luke to fuck off so Luke did just that. Staying inside was too suffocating so he sat outside all alone. He revealed himself to the moon, knowing that it was the one thing that would never leave.

Luke liked that idea.

He had spent so much time all by himself trapped in the big house a few metres behind. Having some time to tell his stories was like finally breathing again. Even though he knew his words flew in the air, forever forgotten. Each scar on Luke's heart had it's own story and Luke hoped he had time to tell each and every one. He had survived each battle and fought so hard he couldn't, no- wouldn't hide his scars anymore.

Luke lost track of time, or maybe he lied to himself so he could forget about the problems inside. Whichever it was, he had fallen asleep outside in the cold. The tips of his ears and nose were as cold as ice and all the colour had drained from his cheeks. His veins stood out, a prominent blue on his paper white skin. It fascinated Luke knowing that he if he teared his skin open, warm, crimson blood would escape. It was like life was meant to be full of warm, happy times. Life was meant to be lived; time was precious. But Luke had been neglecting both.

He stood up slowly, his body frozen due to the cold and position he slept in, he groaned in relief as he stepped into the house. The warm air engulfed his slender body but that wasn't enough. Luke pulled off his top and stood near the heater savouring the blast of heat which tickled his skin. 

Peering at the clock he saw that it was only five in the morning, Alex would wake up in a few hours. Luke knew Ashton stayed the night across the road and he felt a sudden buzz to go over and see his best friend but he fought against his urge as he spotted an ugly bruise on his hips which still hadn't healed. Luke also knew that in a few hours he would most likely have received more of the marks so what did he have to lose? A few more hours of torture? Luke had already experienced hell.

He tugged his shirt back on and rinsed his mouth out with water, too scared to go upstairs to brush his teeth. Luke didn't have bad morning breath anyway. He pulled Alex's coat on and stepped outside, gasping at the thick fog of blanket. He hadn't noticed it earlier. Luke opened his mouth, feeling the dense fog envelope his tongue. He blew out gently and watched how his breaths evaporated into sky and he liked the cold feeling in his mouth. Luke smiled slightly to himself and pulled the coat tighter around him to stop shivering. 

The blond cursed himself for forgetting to check his hair but he shrugged it off hoping that no one would care. Luke knew it was insanely early but he wouldn't have this chance again. He knew this was crazy but everyone was a little crazy.

He brought himself together and hesitantly pressed the bell, hearing it’s ring from outside. The skinny boy waited patiently and hoped that someone had heard because he didn't think he could stay out in the cold any longer.


	24. Happiness

Michael groaned at the ringing. "Calum who's here?" He yawned, nudging the space beside him. Michael frowned when he noticed Calum wasn't in bed. Reluctantly, he stuck his head out the covers and he was right. Calum was gone. It took a moment but then Michael remembered that Calum and Ashton were sleeping together in the guest room. 

Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, the blue haired boy got out of bed and mumbled to himself angrily.

Calum in a way was like Michael, he didn't like being alone. When ever the boy came over (which was most of the time), they both shared Michael's bed. He never liked sleeping by himself but now that Ashton was here, Calum was obviously going to sleep beside him. Michael was happy for the two.

Running a hand through the knotted blue sea on his head, Michael opened the door. The cold air making goosebumps rise on his skin. The person turned around and Michael was surprised to meet the icy, blue eyes of Luke.

It then occurred to him that Michael always hated the colour blue. It was too bright and there was so much of it in the sky. Michael just couldn't stand the colour but ever since he met Luke- he had grown a fond liking towards it. Luke made so many things seem beautiful and Michael knew that if Luke was his then Michael's black heart would lighten and he would learn to love again. 

The boy at his doorstep awkwardly played with his fingers, "Hi Mikey." He breathed and Michael knew that he wanted Luke to be the only person-in his life that he felt breathless around. Michael was addicted to the intoxicating feelings he felt around Luke and couldn't begin to imagine how he'd feel if Luke was his and he was Luke's. 

Michael wanted that so bad. But Luke didn't.

The boy rubbed his hands together, blowing air onto them and Michael snapped out of his trance allowing him to come in.

He lead Luke to the kitchen and Luke sat himself in the same stool he had chosen last time. Michael checked that the heater was on before starting the kettle. "How do you feel about hot chocolate?" He asked and Luke smiled shyly, "That's fine, thank you."

Michael smiled at the boy and sat opposite him, "What brings you here?" He asked and Luke half shrugged. 

"Wanted to see Ash." He said quietly and Michael nodded. 

"I miss you Luke." He said whilst both boys held eye contact. Michael placed his hands on the counter, dangerously close to Luke's making the younger frown.

"What happened?" He asked holding Michael's hands and Michael's held Luke's tightly too, a smile on his lips. Luke noticed and blushed, he hesitated but decided not to move his hands and Michael felt like he would faint.

"Nothing serious." He said trying to act cool. Luke's eyebrows knitted together, his nose slightly scrunched up and Michael couldn't take his eyes off the boy.

"Alex." Michael confessed and Luke's head jerked up. "What?" He stuttered and Michael sighed pulling Luke's hands closer. Luke didn't object and Michael grinned like a fool. 

"We got into a fight last night." Michael said and Luke looked down at their connected hands, worry etched onto his delicate features. Michael rubbed Luke's knuckles softly, unknowingly soothing the younger boy.

The kettle hissed and Luke looked up in fright making Michael chuckle, "I'll be back."

He got off his stool and made the warm drink for the pair. He wanted to make it special so he used whipped cream and luckily he had marshmallows, thank you Calum.

Turning around, he handed the mug to Luke. The boy smiled like a child at the treat. Michael's heart was officially captured by him.

Luke drank his with both hands holding onto the mug, when he put the mug back down there was whipped cream on his nose and Michael found it adorable. Luke smiled slightly at Michael unaware of the cream and Michael wanted to take a picture. 

"Michael, why are the lights on?" Calum groaned walking inside the kitchen. 

"Fuck, why's Luke here?" He asked rubbing his eyes, "Michael there's something wrong with me." 

Calum moaned and walked up to Michael wrapping himself around him like a koala, he hid his head in Michael's neck all whilst keeping his eyes closed. "Why can I see Luke? He's not here. I think I ate something off."

Luke giggled and Michael beamed at the boy but soon he grimaced as Calum's grip tightened.

"Michael! I can hear him." 

"Mate he's right here." Michael said pulling the boy off of him but Calum wasn't having that. His eyes snapped open to look Michael in the eye and the blue haired boy shook his head in amusement before turning his body around so his best friend could see the blond sitting opposite them.

A deep red coated Calum's face and he hid his face in Michael's neck again. "I'm stupid." He mumbled making both boys laugh.

Another sleepy voice could be heard. “Calum, where are you?”

Luke and Michael looked over to see Ashton standing there. Calum had fallen asleep on Michael and Ashton looked jealous but his eyes lit up when spotting Luke.

"Luke!" He walked up to the boy and hugged him tightly, Michael too, was jealous of Ashton.

"Hi Ash." Luke said smiling, "Want some? Mikey made it, it's really good."

Michael flushed at the praise and noticed the look of anger on Ashton's face. "No thank you Luke." He said sweetly before turning to Michael, "Give him to me."

Michael rolled his eyes deciding to mess with the hazel eyed boy, "No. He's quite comfortable where he is. Aren't you Calum?" 

Calum was unaware of the conversation between both boys as he hummed contently. 

Ashton clenched his jaws but his eyes softened as he reached out to stroke Calum's cheek, "Baby it's me, let's go back to bed."

Michael walked away from Ashton and Luke giggled fuelling Michael’s need to mess with Ashton more.

"No I'm taking him back to my room. You've had enough time with my best friend." He said kissing Calum's head and Ashton looked ready to smack him.

Luke's quiet giggles caught both boys attention and Ashton frowned, "Tell him to come back and give me Calum. He'll listen to you." 

Luke giggled and turned to Michael and Michael knew he would give in so he walked back to Ashton sighing in defeat and passed over the sleeping boy. Michael wasn't surprised that he was still asleep, Calum was always a heavy sleeper.

Luke grinned at his best friend and Michael took the time to appreciate Luke's happiness because he had learnt that happiness wasn't always guaranteed in either of their lives. 

It was then, Michael promised himself to always keep Luke happy. Luke's happiness was Michael's happiness.


	25. Beautifully Broken

Alex and Luke had had a great week. It felt too good to be true. They had mornings on the lawn talking and kissing and nights spent making love. The kind Luke always wanted. But amidst everything, Michael was stuck in Luke's head and Luke was so frustrated.

Luke didn't know that behind the curtains, Michael's green eyes bore unshed tears as he saw the couple. Alex was bad for Luke, so why did he love him?

The couple had come back from the park and Luke was still on a high. Suddenly, he was pushed up against the door of the car. Alex looked down at his boyfriend with a smile and the younger smiled back. His arms wrapped around the older mans neck and Alex moved closer.

Michael could see everything.

"Thank you for today.” Luke felt uneasy and wanted to go inside but he didn't want to risk ruining Alex's mood. He stood on his toes pecking the man’s lips but Alex held onto Luke's waist firmly, kissing him passionately. 

Luke didn't feel the butterflies at the bottom of his tummy. But he kissed back, tangling his fingers through Alex's rough hair and connecting their bodies together, the way Alex liked it.

Luke's eyes teared as he realised what was wrong. He wanted to be kissing Michael.

A sudden bang caused Luke to jump away in shock. Alex's arms were still around his waist and Luke blushed a bright crimson when he saw who it was. Michael looked at the two, shooting Luke a forced smile before getting into his car and driving away.

Alex scoffed and Luke looked down at the ground. He knew Michael had seen everything.

***

The blue haired boy rolled down the window of his car, inhaling the cold night air deeply. The car smelt like smoke because of his cigarettes and now the smell was getting too much. Michael's head felt heavy.

He closed his green eyes, leaning back against the seat and thinking about a familiar blue eyed boy. Michael could make Luke feel so much better. 

Luke's pale skin would be soft under Michael's touch and he wanted to see the boy lose control as Michael pleasured him. Michael wanted to kiss him hard and leave them both with swollen lips and wild eyes. Messy hair and marked skin. Michael wanted Luke so bad.

He groaned in his car, his jeans becoming stiff and Michael started his car wanting to go home and have a shower.

He didn’t spend too long cleaning himself, deciding in the shower that he would work on some drawings. It was past eleven at night but he couldn't sleep. He was restless. He had no inspiration; his fingers didn't feel the usual buzz they did before he started a drawing. Michael knew it was hopeless.

He threw his pencil on the ground and let out a frustrated growl. He stared at his dark walls angrily until he was disrupted. Who was here now? There was a little pull of excitement in Michael's body at he thought of the possibility of it being Luke.

But he was so not prepared to see a crying boy at the door. The small blond latched onto Michael, crying loudly. Michael instantly reacted and wrapped his arms securely around Luke. His sobs shook his entire body and the older quickly sat down on the couch with Luke places on his lap.

"Luke what's wrong?!" Michael asked worried but Luke kept on crying.

He pulled away inspecting Luke. There was no visible bruises except dark purple finger marks on both wrists. His trousers were ripped and his cheeks stained. Michael knew that bruises also hid under his clothes.

"I'm sorry." Luke sobbed and Michael was so confused.

Luke got off Michael's lap and sat in the corner of the room, hiding his face in his arms. Michael carefully walked over and sat beside the boy leaving some space between the two.

"Talk to me Luke." Michael said softly and Luke sniffed.

"He said he'd stop." Luke whispered, "Hurts."

Fear gripped Michael's heart as he looked at the boy, forcing himself to not cry.

"What hurts?" He questioned and Luke choked on his tears. Michael rushed to get the boy some water but Luke didn't touch the glass.

"Drink some." Michael urged but Luke refused to listen.

Luke looked up and both boys held eye contact. The tension between the two was thick. No matter what, Michael wouldn't let anyone come in between the two. Luke had unknowingly lit the match that melted the coldness in Michael's heart. 

"Come here." Michael said quietly and Luke wasted no time throwing himself onto the boy. He wrapped himself tightly, not wanting to ever leave because just like before, Michael made Luke feel safer than ever.

***

Luke couldn't close his eyes without the daunting images racing by. It only made him tremble and wrap himself around Michael, tight like a vice. It didn't seem to bother the older boy, he stroked Luke's hair whispering kind words and a thought struck him. 

Could Michael see everything inside? Now that Luke was a broken mess in his arms, he was worried that he would back away from Michael. Both boys were aware of the magnetic pull between them, it only brought them closer and even though their bodies were touching Luke still felt a thousand miles away. His mind, a hurricane trying to tear them apart.

Maybe Michael was Luke's medicine. To help heal him and bring him back to life.

But Luke couldn't ignore the voice in his head telling him that, he loved Alex. He was too weak to leave his past behind. It was hammered in his mind and deep in his heart, Luke wouldn't be able to forget, he'd just have to move on. But Luke was scared that Michael would get tired of waiting for him to move on. What if he could never move on and when he looked for Michael to help, he had already gone?

"Don't leave me." Luke cried, his small body shook because he was crying so hard and Michael had no idea how to calm him down.

"I won't Luke, I won't leave you. I can't leave you Luke. I need you as much as you need me." Michael admitted and it felt so great to say it out loud for both the boys.

"Thought he loved me." Luke began. "He was so nice to me and he told me so many times he loved me. I believed him Mikey, I always believe him and I hate myself for it." Luke pulled away from Michael suddenly feeling deprived. It felt like his skin was crawling and it drove him wild. 

"What's wrong?" Michael asked worried and Luke shook his head in despair. 

"I'm dirty." Luke breathed out, "You can't see me like this."

Luke stumbled as he tried to stand up and Michael rushed to stop him.

"Stop Luke you're beautiful." Michael said softly whilst looking at the mess of tears and blond hair. Luke shook his head, his mind rejecting the words and Michael held Luke's hands with so much love. His other hand raised Luke's chin making him look up and the red in Luke's cheeks matched his sore eyes but all Michael could think was how fucking perfect the boy in front of him was.


	26. Why Won’t You Love Me?

Michael rubbed his hand up and down Luke's small back. The blond was adamant that they both lay in bed together because he was too scared to be by himself. The lights were off but the windows were wide open letting the cool night breeze in. 

Michael never slept with the window open and he never lay over the covers but he found himself easily changing things for the boy beside him.

Michael didn't know that Luke was awake. So when he spoke, it startled him. 

"I saw you with Calum." He said quietly, "On my first night here. You were drunk, you both were. It seemed like you had fun."

Michael tried to think back but all his drunk nights were a blur because they all ended similarly.

"Where were you?" Michael asked curiously, "I would've remembered seeing someone like you."

Luke shook his head, "I was in bed but needed to get some water." He lied, "I heard yelling and looked out."

Michael nodded not knowing that Luke had started to cry again. The thoughts of how Alex made him have sex really seemed to hit Luke hard. It was so wrong.

"Michael I never wanted it." Luke sobbed and Michael looked at the boy with a pained expression. It was dark so he couldn't see much, just the faint outline of his light hair on the pillow because of the moonlight. 

"What did you not want?" Michael asked and Luke sighed.

"His way of love. I wanted someone to love me Mikey, I wanted it so bad." Michael nodded, running a hand through Luke's hair and Luke closed his eyes. 

"It's so hard to be lonely Mikey, how do you do it? How do we do it?" He asked quietly and Michael didn't know the answer to that.

"Why won't he love me?" Luke sniffed asking himself but Michael heard and he wanted to show Luke that he could love him. But Michael was too scared to tell, so all his words were left hanging on his lips.

***

Luke felt someone wrap their arms around his waist. His mind was still half asleep and he felt so fatigued so he moved closer towards the warm body beside him and hid his face from the world. Just a bit of peace was all wanted.

The person smelt like strong cologne, soap and slight smoke. It was so different but intoxicating and Luke loved it. But this wasn't how Alex smelt. This wasn't his cologne and he didn't smoke.

Luke's eyes snapped open and he jumped up groaning at the bright light in his eyes. He sleepily rubbed his eyes and turned over his shoulder to see a familiar blue head of hair sprawled on the white pillows.

He flushed a deep red and his heart dropped when he saw the time. Scrambling out of the warm covers, he ran down the stairs and slipped his shoes on. The laces of his converses were untied but he didn't have time to do them as he ran down the road and back into his own hell.

His breath was heavy and he leaned against the door waiting for his breaths to calm down. His heart still raced and Luke prayed that Alex was asleep but of course luck wouldn't favour him. 

He tiptoed down the corridor knowing he was right. Alex was sat on the kitchen table, the beer can fell and rolled on the ground stopping at his black converses. He looked up gulping and Alex's eyes were dark.

He got up and walked slowly toward Luke and Luke looked down clenching his eyes shut but then Alex had a rough grip of his chin. Luke's blue eyes were forced to look into the angry ones of Alex. 

"You left me Luke." 

Luke didn't know what to say, Alex's calm demeanour was frightening. 

Suddenly, Luke was pushed up against the wall. His head throbbing from the strong force and he willed himself to not cry.

"I'm sorry. I fell asleep and f-forgot to come back." He stuttered and Alex growled.

"You're supposed to stay here you bitch. In here with me!" Luke nodded along desperately and Alex smirked. 

"You're mine Luke. No one else's. Don't fucking forget that." The play boy coughed and Alex moved his hand from his chin to his neck, making it harder for Luke to breathe.

"Who do you belong to?" Alex snarled and Luke looked back up into his cold eyes.

"Y-you. I'm yours Alex." He breathed and Alex let go.

"Who did you go meet?" He demanded and Luke lied to save himself. 

Alex was too drunk to know or even remember but Luke wouldn't forget. The older man gripped Luke's waist angrily. Luke knew what was going to occur so before anything could happen, Luke smashed their lips together. 

Acting like he wanted it made it less painful.

The older man kissed along drunk. Luke didn't like the taste of beer but he was used to it. Luke didn't like anything right now. He just wanted to go back to bed- even though the sun was out.

The sun for some reason stopped brightening Luke's life, it only seemed to make him realise how dark it really was.

Alex's hands gripped Luke's hips tightly taking him upstairs and Luke could feel his hard on against his thigh. He felt sick. He hated the feeling of their skin touching each other and he hated the marks left on his neck. They weren't put there to show love, they were their as a claim. Luke wasn't Alex's lover, he was his possession. 

No amount of showering and harsh scrubbing on his skin would make him feel right again and as he leaned against the cold shower wall he wasn't sure if he was coated in the warm shower water or his tears.


	27. First Time

Luke and Alex had gone out because Alex wanted to show Luke that he was faithful. Luke had been made to drink by Alex so he could let loose but Luke felt more aware than ever. He looked around at all the drunk people watching how they spent their evening. Some danced together, others sat in a booth with friends and others were lonely. Just like Luke.

Alex had said he was going to the bathroom but it had been ages now. Luke smiled kindly at the bartender before hopping off the stool looking for his boyfriend. It took him a while to find the bathrooms, since it was dark and people had no manners. Despite his height, Luke was still scrawny and weak. But finally he made it and walked inside- surprised at the harsh, white lights. It was mostly empty, only two of the stalls occupied but then he heard it. 

Luke gulped and took smaller steps closer to the cubicle at the end. He closed his eyes, feeling a warm tear slide down his cheek and he quickly wiped it away. Alex's rough grunts could be heard and the high pitched voice of a female accompanied him. 

Luke didn't want to be here anymore. But Alex was his ride home.

With a heavy heart, he walked out the bathroom not wanting to let the two know he was there and he took his seat at the counter. The bartender had his eyes on Luke as he played with the glass. It wasn't hard to ignore his sadness but the man behind the counter decided to leave him be. He dealt with sad people every night and it was always best to let them grieve in peace.

All of a sudden, Luke's name was called and the blond turned around to see his best friend with the Maori boy he was slowly falling in love with.

Luke couldn't stop the small smile on his lips as happiness leaked into his heart. He hugged Ashton tightly and before he knew it, he was a sobbing mess. The older boy held his best friend tightly, kissing his forehead and looking at Calum sadly. 

"Can I have a drink?" Luke asked quietly, "I want to forget."

Ashton looked at his best friend hesitantly, he knew Luke hated being under the influence of alcohol but he had been holding on for so long. He was bound to let go.

"Are you sure Luke?" He asked quietly and the smaller boy nodded. Sighing, they both turned to the bartender to see him standing there was a glass already. He smiled sympathetically at Luke, "It's on the house."

***

Michael walked through the doors, the atmosphere was natural to him. He peered around looking for his brown eyed friend and soon spotted him with Ashton.

"Why'd you call me?" He huffed. "I was busy."

He then noticed the sad looks on the two and his brows raised in curiosity, "What's wrong?"

Ashton pulled Calum closer and Calum pecked his cheek before nodding to the right.

Michael looked over his shoulder and his eyes slightly widened. "Is that Luke?" He asked looking back and they both nodded.

His jaw hung slightly, "What's he doing here?"

"We don't know." Ashton said quietly, "We saw him and then he started crying."

"Talk to him Michael." Calum urged, "He talks to you."

Ashton looked at the ground sadly, he felt so far away from his best friend and Calum noticed this.

"Okay." Michael said, "Don't worry I'll take care of him." Ashton smiled gratefully at Michael and nodded reluctantly.

The blue haired boy took a breath as he walked towards Luke. He was slumped on his chair as he drank. Eyes bloodshot and hair a mess, but he still looked insanely hot. 

Michael slid onto the seat beside Luke and sighed, "Hi."

The blonde turned to the side in surprise and hiccuped, "What are you doing here Mikey?"

Michael traced patterns on the counter, "What are you doing here Luke? You shouldn't be here like this."

Luke shrugged looking down at the glass in his hand, "It doesn't matter. He doesn't care."

Michael simply nodded and ordered a glass to drink and Luke did too. They accompanied one another in the silence until Luke stood up stumbling.

"Come dance with me Michael." 

Michael wasn't a dancer. He couldn't move a muscle in his body and wouldn't. He was just so bad at dancing and Michael had seen Luke dance before, like it was so easy and Michael envied the boy but in a good way. Luke was just so fucking perfect.

Sighing, he stood up and Luke dragged him to the floor with a small grin. He began dancing, eyes bright in the dark club and Michael was entranced. Taking a chance, he moved closer to the younger boy placing his hands on Luke's hip. Michael wouldn't take advantage of him he would never do that to anyone. He just wanted to hold Luke like this and forget that he had a boyfriend. Just for a bit. Just until he ran away from Michael again like he did this morning. Michael just wanted a bit of time with the angel.

He couldn't believe it when Luke smiled at him and stood closer as he looked in his eyes. 

"You have green eyes." He said simply and Michael nodded, too breathless to speak.

Luke's hands moved to Michael's neck, playing with the hair and Michael was over the fucking moon.

"You have beautiful eyes Luke." He said and Luke smiled widely. But Michael could see past all that and spotted all the pain he hid inside of him.

"Why are you so sad?" He asked and Luke shook his head.

"I'm not sad."

Michael frowned at the boy but then he spoke up, "I'm forgetting. I don't want to remember today."

***

Luke and Michael found themselves in a darker part of the club, in a booth. Luke admired everything he could about Michael. He was Luke's saviour and had taken over his mind. It was true he wanted to forget and as Michael spoke to him he couldn't resist pressing their lips together.

It was more than what Luke imagined it to be and as he leaned forward Michael pulled away. Green eyes wild as he spoke, "Luke you can't do this, you have a boyfriend."

But Luke was drunk and he didn't care about the monster of a man anymore, "He does it to me."

Luke saw the realisation dawn in Michael's pretty eyes but before he could speak he leaned over again and sighed deeply when Michael kissed him back. The kiss was soft like Michael was scared but Luke wanted passion. He wanted to feel something, so he moved himself onto Michael's lap and kissed hard wrapping his fingers in Michael's blue sea and moved his body closer until their chests touched. 

Michael's heart was racing and he knew that tomorrow Luke would forget. Luke would hate himself if he knew but right now Luke wanted this and so did Michael. Michael had been fantasising this moment since for ever and he never imagined it to be like this.

Michael knew Alex was bad for Luke. Michael thought about it a lot, but Michael wasn't any better. So whilst he could, Michael took a fix of Luke, tending to his cravings because he knew that after tonight he would try hard to forget the blonde boy to make both of their lives easier.


	28. Alone

Michael was up thinking about his kiss with Luke. He had wanted it so bad but he wanted it to be real and he knew deep down that it was the alcohol in Luke's bloodstream. But the feeling of their lips together, their bodies pressed against each other drove Michael mad and he knew that he was addicted to Luke and everything he had to offer. He had had his taste but he was left wanting more.

Michael ran a hand through his messy blue hair and heard a loud bang outside. He got out of bed and looked out to see Alex stagger out of his car and towards the house. Michael's blood instantly ran cold and he wanted to storm up to him and hurt him for hurting Luke. But he promised himself he'd stay away.

***

Luke heard the bang of the door and soon their bedroom door was open. Alex saw the tears Luke had shed and started crying too, surprising the boy. 

"I always fuck up baby. I'm sorry." He cried and Luke cried too, surprised at the apology, "I always end up hurting you Luke."

Luke stayed silent because it was true. Luke was drunk, his mind a huge knot of wires and he held his arms out embracing the man. 

Luke held a bit of hatred in his tender heart towards the man but he couldn't stop himself from lying and telling Alex that it was okay even though he knew it wasn't. Luke still had Michael's kiss replaying in his mind and it was wrong but it felt so realer than what he felt with Alex.

He didn't want to be a cheater so he wiped Alex tears off and pressed their lips together. Hoping to erase the memories.

***

The couple woke up at the same time with severe headaches and Luke knew straight away he had been drinking yesterday. He frowned to himself knowing that it was unusual for him. Everything that happened yesterday was just a fog in his mind and he groaned. He hated drinking.

He walked down the stairs holding onto the rails and drank some water with an aspirin before going back up to give it to Alex. Alex was already out of bed getting dressed. Luke watched him pull on his clothes and comb his hair- thinking back to the day they met. Luke was a mess in the hospital and Alex was there to comfort him. Luke had never felt so special, he couldn't stop himself from loving the man. No one ever had loved Luke before.

It was that simple and Alex promised that no one would ever hurt Luke; Luke believed him like a fool. Alex took the pill with the water, avoiding Luke's gaze and he knew that Alex wouldn't be coming home tonight.

Luke picked up the phone and rang Ashton. Luke couldn't stay at home right now, it was too hard, so when Ashton picked up saying that he was coming in five minutes, Luke couldn't be more relieved.

***

The blond had asked if they could lie together on the ground whilst blasting an album on the player and Ashton obviously said yes to his best friend. Ashton missed the good old days with Luke. He missed his smile and laughter and how used to love life so much. The two boys had spent years together and knew everything about each other. Ashton just wanted the old Luke back.

They had been surrounded by silence for ages until Luke spoke up.

"He's gone to meet him again." 

Luke didn't have to look to know Ashton was clenching his jaw. 

"I can't love him anymore Ash. It's getting harder and harder." 

The hazel eyed boy rolled over to the side and faced his friend, "Then leave before it gets too much. Leave before it's too late Luke." 

Luke turned to look into the hazel eyes of the golden haired boy and he knew that Ashton would always care for him. He nodded and felt for Ashton's hands, intertwining theirs together and studying the differences. 

The older pecked Luke's temple sighing as he wrapped an arm around him and Luke closed his eyes savouring the moment.

It was a flash of light that woke them up and Luke looked to see Calum towering over the two. Ashton groaned beside him and Luke rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"Stop stealing my boyfriend." Calum grumbled, "I ship you guys more than I ship myself with him."

Luke giggled and blushed and Ashton pulled him closer, hiding his face in Luke's stomach still wanting to sleep. Calum frowned and kicked his bum making him groan.

"Stop babe 'm tired." Ash mumbled and Calum rolled his eyes but threw a pillow to the ground so Ashton could rest his head on it. He smiled sleepily and muttered a 'thanks babe' before falling back to sleep. Luke was wide awake now and Calum helped pull him up.

"So how have you been?" Calum asked and Luke shrugged, "I should get home."

Calum knew better than to ask the boy to stay longer so he smiled kindly offering him a ride and Luke politely accepted.

Both boys talked- well Calum did most of the talking whilst Luke listened but it worked for the pair and Luke had ended the ride with a stronger friendship.

***

He walked into the house expecting to be met with the silence but instead he heard the rough voice of Alex and a new one. Luke's heart dropped and he walked into the house, head down in shame. Alex was on the couch, a dark skinned boy straddling him as they kissed. The man pulled away and noticed Luke standing at the door. Guilt flooded his face but Luke looked away stopping the tears, "I'll go make some lunch."

The blond stepped into the kitchen, on the brink of crying but he pulled himself together. He felt the sudden need to punch the stranger but he knew that wouldn't do anyone a favour. Luke had never wanted to hurt anyone before but knowing that the intruder knew Luke was here crying in the kitchen watching his boyfriend with someone else made Luke mad. What kind of person was he?

He spent no time on preparing the lunch and didn't make any for himself because he couldn't bare to eat. 

Alex and his boy toy came in laughing and Luke looked away. 

"None for you?" Alex asked not bothered and he carried on talking to the boy ignoring Luke's quiet 'I'm not hungry.'

He walked out of the kitchen heading for the stairs so he could crawl in bed and cry but Alex's voice echoed in the hallway and the words hurt Luke because he knew what would happen whilst he was forced to spend the night outside.

He didn't take a coat as he left the house. The boy had sweater paws and sad eyes and the cold wind nipped at his cheeks- red rising to the surface of his skin. He shivered and wrapped his arms around himself.

Luke had nowhere to go.


	29. Thunder Storms and Strangers

Luke didn't know the area. He was scared of walking too far and getting lost but he was sure he knew the way to Ashton's. He could vaguely remember the bends and curbs but he didn't want to trouble the lad. He had just come back from there.

The cold wind was cruel and Luke wished that he wasn't alive. He couldn't stop himself from thinking about all the years he spent with Alex. Luke had once loved him and he was sure he still did- but it was just so hard believing something that was a lie. As he thought about all the moments he spent with the man, Luke realised that all the happier times were at the start of their relationship and there wasn't much. Thinking of Alex tormented him but he couldn't seem to stop.

He looked around the bleak neighbourhood, what really was left for him? There was nothing about his new start that felt different, nothing had changed from before. There was only one thing that Luke was beginning to love but he was to scared to admit his feelings towards the green eyed boy.

It started to rain.

Luke shivered uncontrollably in the thin material of his sweater. His discoloured black jeans were darkening from the rain and his converses were muddy and damp. He sat on the ground, near a tree and huddled into a ball. He could feel the cold pellets run down his neck to his back and he hated the tingle that run down his spine. 

His fingers were stark white contrasting to the darkness around him and his lips were dry no matter how much he licked them. Maybe if this was the end Luke wouldn't mind. But Luke knew that he wasn't so lucky, he'd still be filling up his part of the world and people wouldn't think otherwise. They didn't know how hollow he felt inside and the pain which he carried around with him; which he had been carrying for the past few years.

Luke wasn't anything special.

Bright lights blinded his eyes and he bent down looking into his lap as the car drove past, splattering the muddy water onto him. He was soaked to the bone and his hair lay flat on his head and suddenly Luke started to cry.

Crying in the rain was good, no one could see. Only Luke could differentiate from the two as he felt the hot tears on his cheeks before they were overpowered with the cold. He made no effort to wipe them away because they kept on falling; Luke just let them. 

Thunder cracked through the sky and Luke's eyes widened in fear. Judging by the rain, he knew the storm was going to be brutal and he was terrified. 

Forcing himself up, Luke’s skinny legs dragged him around trying to stay out of the thunder but when he saw the lighting he felt his chest tighten. Suddenly, it felt hard to breath and Luke felt so sick. He wasn't watching where he walked and soon bumped into a little girl. She had a bright pink rain coat and yellow boots and she smiled up at him, showing her little teeth. Luke smiled at her and she frowned. 

"Where's your coat?" She asked curiously and Luke lied to the girl. "I forgot it at home."

She giggled, "You're silly. I always forget my coat but mummy reminds me."

Luke smiled kindly at the cute girl, "Where is your Mummy?" Her brown eyes widened in fear and she looked around before sighing. "She's over there."

Luke looked over to see a woman with a baby at her hips. She was trying to open her car and she looked like she needed help.

The blond felt a tug on his hand and he looked down through his soaked lashes, "Aren't you cold?"

Luke shook his head but the girl pulled off her scarf, "Here you go." She giggled and Luke felt his heart start to warm. He loved children so much and the simplistic way they viewed the world. They knew wrong from right and always tried to do the right thing. People shouldn't underestimate children.

He refused kindly but the girl insisted and Luke felt his eyes water. When Luke was older and ready, he was going to have so many kids. He’d look after them and never make them sad. Luke would love his kids so much and they would love him back and Luke would never feel lonely.

The skinny blond bent down towards the girl and she giggled, "You have pretty eyes. Wait, what's your name?"

"I'm Luke." He said simply, "Whats yours?"

She pointed to herself with a smile, "I'm May." 

Luke didn't know how May was so happy and cheerful in this weather but he loved her for it. Slipping his cold fingers into her gloved hand, he stood up.

"Shall we go back to your Mummy?" He asked and she nodded eagerly.

***

Luke knew it was really late. The moon was hidden tonight and Luke sat on the damp bench hugging himself. He still had May's scarf wrapped around him and he smiled softly at the thought of the girl. 

Leaning back, Luke looked at the grey clouds littering the sky which reflected his mood. He so desperately wanted it to be sunny. The sun was safe. 

Luke couldn't sleep and he didn't like the look he got from strangers. He decided to head home and sleep outside in the porch or slip inside secretly. Luke couldn't do this anymore and he didn't notice the drunk man until he was standing right in front of him.

The man eyed the blond boy and gripped him tight making him freeze. Luke didn't have the strength to fight him off but he screamed nonetheless, fresh tears coating his red cheeks as the man slipped his hand under his sweatshirt.

"Please d-don't! I didn't do anything! Let me go." He cried and the man took no notice as he pushed him roughly against the tree. The bark was rough against Luke's back but that was the least of his concerns.

The mans hands travelled down to his crotch and Luke cried remembering all the times Alex had done this too. The foreign hand down his trousers was heartbreaking and finally Luke pushed him away running hard. His breathing was heavy and his heart beat was wild. The wind making the inside of his mouth dry but he didn't stop until he saw the familiar street. He felt onto the lawn and scrambled to hide behind the bins, crying bitterly to himself. 

Luke hated this so much.

The boy wanted to shower and rid himself of the earlier events but he was so tired and scared so he stayed where he was; letting the rain wash away everything as his mind shut down leaving him in the dark.


	30. Help

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re about halfway through the book!

Luke had spent the past four days crawling inside at dawn, making breakfast and silently cleaning the house making sure to leave in the night to return back to the cold world outside. He spent three nights sleeping outside, not daring to leave his lawn because of the drunk man. Two people came to check on him but Luke hid himself away until they forced to leave. Luke wanted only one boy to come but he never did.

He was still in the same sweater and jeans and they were ripped and dirty. Luke couldn't sleep at night, images of the man kept haunting him and he knew he looked a mess. 

He kept his eyes on the house in front, wondering why Michael never came out in the day. The blue haired boy only ventured out in the dark and came back with big black bags. Luke didn't know what was inside.

He hadn't eaten and drank properly in days and he could take it anymore. It was raining again and Luke's head was pounding, he stood up but his head started to spin and he vomited into the bin. Only bile forcing it's way out of his body. 

He stumbled towards the door and knocked once hoping that the person would open the door and when Luke felt the warmness tickle his skin he fell into the boys arms. Black spots invading his vision.

***

Michael looked down at Luke's malnourished body in shock. He was lifeless against him and Michael bent down to carry him in his arms. He held the boy close, shivering because his skin was like ice.

Michael brushed the muddy hair out of his sleeping eyes and placed him down on his bed, wrapping the boy with the dark covers. He went back to get some more blankets and still felt like it wasn't enough. Michael went back down for a glass of water and a mug of tea just in case he wanted that instead.

He walked back into his room and saw dull, blue eyes looking back at him. It was relief to know Luke was awake and Michael went to his side.

Luke sniffed and Michael knew he had been crying. 

"Here drink some water." He said and for once Luke didn't decline and he took the glass and drank it all down. Michael cursed himself for not getting more.

"Thank you." Luke coughed out making the older frown. 

He walked to his wardrobe and pulled out the biggest sweater and sweatpants he owned before pulling out an old pair of fluffy socks Calum had bought him for Christmas. Calum wanted to see Michael wearing them but of course he never had worn them. That was one of Calum's useless gifts but Michael was thankful he held onto them.

Michael tried to get Luke into the shower but the blond trembled at the thought of it. He didn't want to be alone with his abused body, so Michael didn't push him.

He sat Luke up which was easy enough and pulled off his tattered sweater. Luke's torso was cold, despite being hidden away and Michael feared that Luke would need to go hospital. He dressed Luke in the jumper and sweatpants and put his feet into the socks but Luke still shivered uncontrollably.

Michael had the heaters on and all the windows closed. There was even a hot cup of tea beside the boy but he was still cold and Michael was so scared.

"Calum, how do you warm someone up?" He asked desperately over the phone.

Luke's eyes were closed as he lay in the bed scrunched up into a ball under all the layers and Michael kept his eyes on him.

"What do you mean? What happened?" Calum asked and Michael tapped his feet on the ground anxious, "I've tried heaters, clothes, warm drinks but nothing's working!"

Calum worried over his best friends anxiety, "What's wrong Michael?" 

Michael paced the room, "I'm scared Cal. He's not doing good. I don't wanna take him to hospital, I don't think he'd like that."

"Who isn't doing good?" Calum asked and sighed when he heard Luke's name.

"Have you tried skin to skin contact? That's the most effective they say."

Michael's brows furrowed in confusion, "What's that?"

Calum explained everything and Michael knew he had heard of it before. He was worried about Luke's reaction but fuck it, Luke's health was more important.

Michael got rid of his clothes leaving himself in his boxers and went inside his bed, sighing at the warmness. Luke's eyes were still closed and Michael tapped his shoulders causing his eyes to snap open. His blue eyes studied Michael and he noticed that he was nearly nude.

"It's the only way to keep you warm." Michael said and Luke got confused. 

"I am warm." He said through chattering teeth and sighed when he knew that there was no point convincing the boy beside him.

"Please Luke. I promise it's not for anything else." 

Luke would never have said yes so easily but Michael had never hurt him before and Luke had a hopeless crush on him.

Michael eased him up and soon both boys were in their underwear. Luke's eyes held slight fear but Michael promised him that it would make him feel better.

Luke was shy but Michael was eager and soon both boy were wrapped around each other. Luke's head resting on Michael's chest: skin to skin contact. Michael rested his chin on Luke's hair and wrapped arms around his back pulling the smaller boy closer and he relished the warmth and heat knowing that Luke could feel it too. 

"Feel better?" He asked and Luke hummed too tired to speak. 

Even with the dirt in his hair and on his skin, Luke smelt sweet like cinnamon but with a hint of apple and Michael was obsessed. He rested his head down on Luke's shoulders and closed his eyes peacefully. Luke had fallen asleep and Michael felt sparks everywhere in his body. He admired everything about the pretty boy and now that Luke's lips were pressed against Michael's collarbones Michael had to stop his mind from going to the gutter. 

The lights were off and both boys were surrounded with heat it was so easy to drift off and Michael did so. Knowing that Luke was safe and sound in his arms, away from all the dangers in the world.


	31. Nightmares

Michael groaned and looked up- seeing a crying Luke on the bed. The blue eyed boy had slipped into Michael's jumper but was barelegged with only socks covering his feet. Michael rubbed his sleepy eyes and sat up, looking worriedly at the boy, "What happened Luke?" He asked softly and Luke looked back with red eyes.

"Had a bad dream." He mumbled, "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

Michael shook his head sleepily, "That's alright I'd rather you don't face it alone."

He ran a hand through his messy hair and moved towards Luke. The older didn't miss the way Luke flinched and shuffled away, even if it was meant to be discreet. Michael respected that and didn't bring it up thinking it had to something to do with Luke's dream, or should he say nightmare?

They sat in silence, Michael knowing that Luke would speak in his own time. 

The younger was having an internal battle with himself, he didn't know what to do or how to fix any of this and as he looked at Michael and saw the way his eyes lit up and how he smiled softly at Luke, Luke felt calm.

"I-I.." Luke wrapped his arms around his knees and looked down at the duvet taking a breath. 

Michael's hand raised up and Luke looked up curiously. "You can hold my hand." Michael said sheepishly, "It's what Calum's makes me do when he has nightmares, it calms him down."

Luke looked at Michael's invitation and inside Michael hoped that Luke would accept it. Michael was yelling to himself when Luke slipped his small hands into Michael's bigger ones and smiled to himself slightly.

Michael realised how innocent Luke really was and he hated that he had lived such a harsh life. A person like Michael would have been able to deal with it but Luke was handed the shit life and Michael would've done anything to swap places with the boy. He was so smitten by Luke. It was sad really.

"I was in the park." He said quietly, "All by myself. It was dark, I didn't know the time but I wanted to go back home.”

Michael listened intently and showed no emotions to unsettle Luke and the younger boy appreciated that a lot.

"The man, h-he came out of nowhere." Tears streamed down Luke's cheeks as he clenched his eyes shut tightly and Michael fought the urge to pull the smaller boy onto his lap.

"I'm dirty." Luke said quietly, "So dirty."

Michael squeezed Luke's fingers making him open his eyes. "Don't say that Luke. You're not."

But Luke shook his head, tears spilling everywhere. "He had his hands on me Mikey. I didn't like it, it made me think of-"

Luke stopped speaking and Michael's heart kept pounding. 

"What did he do Luke?" He asked quietly and Luke shook his head. Michael let out a frustrated breath but kept himself together for Luke. 

"Can I hold you?" He asked quietly and Luke looked like a deer in headlights. The blond fumbled with his fingers and Michael felt stupid for asking but then Luke climbed onto Michael's lap and wrapped his thin body around Michael's own.

"He touched me in bad places Mikey." Luke whispered, breaking Michael's heart. "I couldn't stop him, I tried- I didn't want it. I swear I didn't!"

"Don't cry Luke, it's okay. I know you're telling the truth." Michael said softly to the sad boy. 

The two stayed glued together until Luke's heavy breathing let Michael know that he was asleep. Michael knew he wouldn't be able to sleep after that. He still couldn't process everything Luke had said, it was all a jumble of sad words and then Michael hid his face in his hands as he cried silently. He didn't want Luke to know.

***

Bright blue eyes opened sleepily; Luke took in the band posters on the wall. The bed was empty and he sat up stretching. He still had on Michael's huge black sweater which kept him toasty warm and he got out of the bed scratching his head.

Luke was in fluffy, white socks and no pants but he was comfortable and he silently left the room trekking down the stairs. Hushed voices could be heard and Luke stood awkwardly staring at the three boys in the room. Ashton was the first to spot him and he gave Luke a smile but the boy knew Ashton was hurt inside. He waved at Ashton and the hazel eyed boy gestured for Luke to come sit.

Luke looked around hesitantly and Calum gave Luke his usual big grin that always made Luke happy. Michael had bags under his eyes but he mustered up a small smile for the younger boy making Luke smile bashfully at the floor. He walked towards his best friend and soon Ashton had pulled him onto his lap; Luke let out a small sigh, holding onto him tightly. He rested his head in the crook of Ashton's neck and turned to look at the other two boys. Calum looked adoringly at his boyfriend and Luke was happy Ashton had found someone good for him. But Michael's eyes held an unreadable emotion and the younger wanted to know what was going on in his mind.

"Hey Lukey." Ashton whispered. "How do you feel?"

"Better, thanks to Michael." He said quietly and Ashton hummed. Luke could feel the vibrations of his humming.

"What happened Lu? Why were you outside for so long?" Ashton asked and Luke felt uncomfortable with the other two boys watching him. He turned and hid his face in Ashton's neck, Ashton secured his hold.

The hazel eyed boy already knew because Michael had told him but he wanted to hear it from Luke. He wanted to report the man from last night and hurt him for doing that to Luke.

"You okay L?" He asked and Luke nodded. "He's with someone else Ash." The younger boy whispered, "I was lonely for four days in the cold and he doesn't care. No one cares for me." 

Ashton shook his head and kissed Luke's temple, "That's a lie Luke. I care, you know I do. Calum cares about you a lot too." Ashton said truthfully and then he looked at the Michael. Calum was rubbing his back reassuringly, face hidden in his hands so only blue hair could be seen. This was the hardest for Michael. Ashton wished that life was easier for both Luke as well as Michael.

"Michael cares a lot for you Luke. And I know you know that."


	32. In Too Deep

All four boys decided to spend the evening watching a movie to forget about the problems for a bit. They had discussed it earlier and Michael approached Luke. The older boy wanted to go to the police but Luke didn't want to. He was crying, his little body shaking furiously and the other boys knew it wouldn't do any good. But Michael wasn't going to let it go, in the future some time when Luke was more stable, they would fight for him.

Calum and Ashton shared the loveseat and Michael was on the couch with Luke. There was a decent amount of space between the two but Michael wanted to be pressed against the boy like Cal and Ash were with each other. Like how they were last night in bed.

He paid no attention to the movie on the screen, instead focusing on the boy on the other side of the couch. Calum was placed on Ashton's lap, both kissing each other passionately making Michael grimace but he knew they were taking care of each other. Ashton was broken over Luke, he felt like such a useless friend for never being there for Luke despite Calum and Michael reassuring him that he wasn't a bad guy.

Luke hadn't spotted the scene in the corner of the room and Michael hoped he wouldn't. The light from the TV shone on the boy making his skin look translucent and his eyes were animated as he watched the scene unfold before him on the screen. Michael nudged Luke's thigh with the popcorn bowl, encouraging him to eat. Luke hardly ate, he had little portions of everything and Michael knew that it wasn't healthy. 

Luke politely declined, fiddling absentmindedly with the worn out blanket around him and Michael found it strangely adorable. 

After some time, the younger boy yawned but refused to admit that he was tired.

"Should we stop the film for a bit?" Michael asked, "We can continue it tomorrow." But Luke shook his head.

"Lie down then Luke. You'll be more comfortable." 

Luke looked at Michael and Michael smiled reassuring him. "Nothing will happen. If you fall asleep, I promise I'll pause the film."

Luke bit his lip slightly and Michael couldn't help but stare. His mind wandered back to the night in the bar and Michael so desperately wanted to kiss the angel again. The blue light from the TV looked beautiful on the messy-haired boy and Michael felt the familiar longing in his heart as Luke crawled towards him and lay down, placing his head delicately on the pillow on Michael's lap.

He made himself comfortable and went back to watching the film.

"Thank you Mikey." He said quietly making the lad smile to himself. "That's alright Luke. You never have to be scared of me."

The two continued watching the film, but Michael like before didn't pay attention. He hadn't realised his fingers had tangled in Luke's hair. The boy had taken a shower earlier and now his hair was soft. His body was hidden away in Michael's big clothes and he looked so adorable, Michael could kiss him forever.

Michael's fingers played with Luke's blonde locks and the sleepy boy sighed happily. He felt so happy and peaceful and his body was filled with so much warmth and love towards all three boys especially Michael. 

How could Luke not feel anything towards the boy that made him the happiest he had felt in years.

***

"Break it up." Michael said throwing a pillow at the two lovebirds on his couch. "Luke's sleeping."

Both boys had swollen lips and messy hair and the same look of love and passion in their eyes and Michael was slightly jealous of them. 

"Sod off." Calum groaned, "Just because you haven't put your dick in ass doesn't mean we can't."

Ashton blushed at Calum's words and Michael threw his supposedly best friend a dirt and another pillow.

Calum caught it and threw it on the ground standing up and taking Ashton's hands in his. Michael rolled his eyes; picking the pillow from the ground and threw it back in the couch.

"Don't have sex." He yelled and Calum laughed loudly, "Come stop us!"

Michael glared at the pair as they walked upstairs, "Fuck you Calum!"

"Fuck Luke, Michael." Calum said and then yelped as Ashton threw him over his shoulder. 

"That's my best friend you're talking about babe." Ashton said slapping his bum and Calum giggled making Michael huff.

He tidied up the main room and then turned to the blond boy on the couch. He bent down and lifted his weightless body up. Luke instinctively moved away, from Michael's hold and Michael tried to ignore the sadness in his heart.

"Luke, it's me. It's Mikey." He whispered and Luke's eyes opened slowly. His blue eyes studied Michael and Michael pressed a delicate kiss to his head, relieved that Luke was okay. Luke felt little bolts of electricity form from where Michael's lips touched his skin and he smiled sleepily making Michael's heart shake. 

Luke's hands rose and he held Michael's cheeks softly and Michael couldn't help but lean into his touch. For some reason Michael's eyes started to water and Luke laughed quietly, "Don't cry Mikey."

Michael nodded and laughed too, blinking the tears away. "Thank you Luke."

Luke's brows furrowed together and looked at Michael in confusion, moving his hand back down. Michael missed Luke's touch already but he had reached the bed now so he placed Luke's body down on the bed and he sat beside him.

"Why are you thanking me?" Luke asked and Michael shrugged. 

Luke and Michael were already in comfortable clothes so Michael switched off the lights leaving the two in the dark.

"Mikey?" Luke's soft voice asked and Michael sighed. 

"Thank you for being you Luke. You wouldn't understand now." He said truthfully and Luke nodded not wanting to push the boy.

Michael got in bed beside and covered the two with the duvet. Making sure Luke wouldn't get cold throughout the night.

"Goodnight Mikey." Luke said quietly and Michael closed his eyes. "Night Luke."

***

Michael couldn't sleep tonight either. He was restless and his brain wasn't shutting down. His body felt stressed and his mind overworked and he needed a release.

So he found himself in the shower at two in the morning. Hot water streaming down making the shower walls foggy as he grunted. The water eased the muscles in his body but they were also tense as he carried on pleasuring himself. He leaned against the walls, eyes closed tightly as the boy who lay innocently on his bed invaded his thoughts.

Michael didn't want to stop, it felt wrong to be thinking about Luke like this but he couldn't force this bliss to an end. Luke's name slipped through his lips as he increased his pace. His breath became heavy as dirty images filled his mind.

He wanted Luke writhing under him as he showed himself and the boy that love could be and feel this good. He wanted to play with Luke's hair like he did earlier and he wanted to see his pretty, pink lips moan his name. His blue eye dark and wild.

Fuck, Michael wanted it all with Luke.


	33. A Work of Art

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some cute muke <3

Michael felt a tap on his shoulder and he groaned.

"Mikey, get up." A soft voice called making him roll over. He heard a squeak and forced his eyes open and was met with blue ones. They were insanely close to him and Michael's hands moved to hold Luke in place in fear that he'd topple over.

The blush coating Luke's cheeks was cute and Michael studied his features, knowing he’d never get bored of admiring him.

"Morning." Luke piped up and Michael broke out into a smile.

Luke squirmed on top of Michael and the blue haired lad sat up, Luke on his lap. Michael tried hard to ignore the fact that Luke was sitting so close to him as he listened to him speak.

"Ash made me come wake you." Luke said, "He's making breakfast."

Michael nodded and held Luke's thin hips lightly, moving him to the side. Luke stood up and Michael could see that he was in the same clothes from yesterday.

"Want some new clothes?" He asked and Luke nodded shyly. "Yes please."

Michael smiled at his manners, "You don't have to ask me Luke. Take what you want." 

Luke looked into his wardrobe and picked out a simple T-shirt and some sweatpants. His fragile body was still prone to the temperature changes and Michael reached in, pulling out a jumper too. "Here, so you don't get cold."

"Thank you Mikey." He said softly and Michael shrugged, "I don't mind. I like helping you Luke."

Once both boys were dressed, they went down joining the pair downstairs. Breakfast was good and Michael made sure that Luke ate a sufficient amount of food. All three boys were concerned for his health but they knew that Luke really did try to eat. He wasn't putting off the food, he just wasn't hungry. 

Calum and Ashton lazed around downstairs but Michael had taken Luke upstairs with him. 

"So, we never really got round to drawing that day." Michael began. Luke remembered that day, Michael had confessed his feelings.

The tension between them was thick and they both tried hard to ignore it. 

Michael had laid out paper and all sorts of equipment and Luke suddenly felt excited. Michael could see the boy studying all the pencils and paints and he tried to hide his smile. 

"Go crazy." Michael said and Luke nodded. 

Michael reached for his usual pencil and started marking out the drawing he had planned but he didn't put in one hundred percent because he was too interested in Luke. The boy was focusing hard, tongue peeking out as his pencil travelled the page. Michael was curious about what Luke would draw, he guessed he'd just have to wait.

A good half an hour or so had gone by and Michael had never been happier. He was spending time with Luke doing normal things instead of tending bruises or pretending he wasn't upset and he felt really good. 

Luke stood away, holding out his sheet of paper and Michael craned his neck to see the finished piece and he looked at it in awe.

"You're an incredibly drawer, Luke. Why'd you ever doubt yourself?" Michael asked causing Luke to blush.

"It's beautiful, what is it? Michael asked and Luke put the paper down first. 

"Every time I look into your eyes, they remind me of the pretty necklace my mum used to wear. The stone was green like your eyes." Luke said shyly and Michael felt giddy with joy.

***

Spending the day at Michael's was more than Luke could ever wish for but he couldn't ignore the responsibilities he had at home. He was worried sick and truthfully, Luke wanted to go home and see how Alex was holding up. 

He tried to forget him and focus on something else but every time he tried he just saw Michael. Michael had suddenly taken control of Luke's life but it was a good thing because Luke had never felt so entitled and free. 

It was raining again and Luke never finished the film so he asked Michael if he could and of course the boy said yes. They were sat in the silence but Luke couldn't concentrate as he thought about the last couple of days. He thought about the man from the park and started trembling. Michael didn't notice which Luke was thankful for so he excused himself to the bathroom.

The tiles were cold but that didn't matter as he weeped bitterly. Luke's life was a mess and he had no idea how to fix it. The only good thing that seemed to brighten up a pathway was Michael but Luke worried that he would only be temporary.

A quiet knock snapped Luke out of his thoughts. Michael's soft voice could be heard from outside but Luke ignored it not wanting to be seen in this state. But Luke had forgotten to lock the door and Michael walked in, taking in the scene.

He walked towards the boy silently and crouched down running a hand through his hair. Luke looked up, tears making his eyes look shiny like crystals. How could someone look so gorgeous when they cried?

"I'm sorry I alway cry." Luke hiccuped and Michael shook his head chuckling sadly. "That's the least of my worries. What's wrong Luke?"

Luke looked down not knowing what to say and Michael placed a hand on his knees making Luke shiver. He still wasn't used to Michael's electrifying touch and he didn't think he ever would get used to it.

"I'm scared about Alex." He admitted and Michael nodded blankly. "What if he knows? He'll hurt me." He whispered and Michael shook his head adamantly, "No he won't. I won't let him near you."

Luke's heart sped up at that and for some reason it made him happy. 

He extended his pinky finger out. "Promise?" He asked and Michael looked down at the broken boy; eyes softening at his innocence. Michael held out his pinky locking the two together and sealing the deal with a kiss to the head. 

"I promise, Luke."


	34. Broken Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really like this chapter and I hope you guys do too. You could call this the beginning of Muke!!

Luke longingly looked out the window, he had planned a time to sneak out. Ashton was busy with Michael in the kitchen and Luke had no idea where Calum was but he didn't try searching as he knew that'd take longer. Quickly and quietly, Luke left the house and walked up the old pathway to his home.

He took a big breath and opened the door straightaway meeting Alex and being met with a smack to the face.

"Why do you always break rules Luke? I love you, so why do you go and make it so hard for me?" He questioned. He held Luke's jaw in his hand and stuck his thumb in his mouth, pushing down onto his tongue.

Luke's body flooded with fright and he looked at Alex praying that he would calm down but when he was flung to the ground, he knew he was imaging the unimaginable. Luke groaned and shielded himself from the brutal punishment, listening to Alex's angry words.

"I saw you leave his house Luke. You're such a whore! You belong to me, how could you forget?! Huh!" He spat each word making the tears fall faster. Luke had been trapped in this endless cycle of abuse for years. No matter how hard he convinced himself that he was okay, he knew he wasn't. And Luke couldn't take anymore, this was his breaking point. 

He cried loudly, infuriating Alex more and bringing more pain upon himself. Alex had already broken him inside and out, taking every little thing away from him. From his own voice to his innocence and Luke knew he had nothing left to give Michael. He hated himself but he hated Alex more, for ruining him and Luke felt the urge to die. Ask Alex to end his life or to do it himself but he knew he would never act according to his thoughts because Luke was too scared. He had always been too scared. Maybe if he was more brave he wouldn't be living like a prisoner. 

Alex dragged him onto the couch ripping off his clothes.

"These aren't your fucking clothes Luke. What do you think? He'll save you? What would he want in you? God, what did I see in you?" Alex spat, each word stabbing Luke's heart.

Luke remembered all the happy times with Alex. How could he be this monster? Pretty flowers filled up his mind and Luke wished he was outside now, free like they were swaying in the wind. He clenched his eyes shut for the millionth time praying that this would be over but he knew that this was just the beginning.

Luke heard the clanging of glass bottles and when Alex returned, Luke froze. Alex didn't seem to notice as he gulped down the liquid, a harsh hand on Luke's bare thigh. Luke whimpered and Alex threw the bottle to the ground. Luke watched it shatter into a million glass fragments. The lights from the ceiling shone down reflecting offering like little crystals.

Alex's grip moved further up Luke's thigh; Luke clenched his eyes shut. The man smirked at the younger boys reaction and he pulled Luke down hovering over him.

"Please don't." Luke pleaded, "Don't hurt me."

Alex hummed and trailed his finger down Luke's face. Tracing his eyes, nose and then hovered around his lips. "What about all those time you hurt me babe? Have you forgotten? Leaving me home by myself and getting me mad even though I tried hard for you."

Luke shivered under his touch, it felt like Alex was etching his skin with dirt and he hated it. 

"You've got to make up for it baby." Alex's voice held lust and Luke hoped that Michael realised he was missing and tried to find him. 

"Please." Luke whispered, "Please, please, please."

Alex chuckled and wiped the tears off of Luke's face delicately. "Don't cry baby. Open your eyes, you'll like it. I won't hurt you."

Luke looked into Alex's dark eyes and prayed that he would find something inside that showed regret or remorse but there was nothing.

His hands travelled down Luke's body, groping and placing kisses and Luke was paralysed in pure fright. Alex marked Luke's skin with his lips instead of his hands and Luke's eyes dimmed. The light fading away until he looked like a vacant doll.

The sudden banging and yelling from outside shocked Alex but Luke was numb. Alex got off Luke, anger burning in his body and Luke sat up grabbing a pillow and huddled into a little ball. 

He whimpered to himself his body vibrating and then he heard harsh words being thrown around and he wished he could block out everything.

***

Michael walked hesitantly into the house. He couldn't look at Alex without wanting to kill the man so he pushed by, letting Ashton deal with him. Calum's presence behind him was slightly calming but he needed to see Luke to be at peace. 

The sight in front of him made him stop and Calum gasped. Michael felt Calum's hand on his shoulder but he shrugged it away, body shaking with tears. 

He dragged his feet towards the boy and crouched down. His fingers shook as he reached out to touch Luke's skin but it alarmed the younger boy and he shuffled away sobbing loudly.

"Go. Please go, leave me alone." 

Luke sounded so broken and it left Michael in pieces as he saw what was left of the boy he was learning to love.

"Luke it's me. It's Michael, you know I'd never hurt you." Michael whispered, desperately trying to take Luke out of the war going on in his mind.

"Michael." Luke said quietly and Michael's heart raced, "Michael, go away."

The green eyed boy felt the tears on his cheeks but he ignored them as he tried to get Luke's attention. He held Luke's cold hands in his own warm ones and looked at Calum desperately. "Get him a blanket."

Calum nodded straight away and ran out of the room, Luke's body was on display, revealing all the bruises and hickeys. He had on boxers and that was it as he cowered away from the eyes that looked at him through tears. Luke didn't need their pain, not when he had his own. 

Harsh footsteps echoed down the hall and Michael's head whipped around ready to fight Alex but then he saw a bloody Ashton stand at the doorway. His hand ran through his tangled curls and his eyes watered at the sight of Luke. 

"Luke?" He asked quietly falling to his knees in front of the boy and Luke looked up staring at the golden boy emotionlessly.

Ashton didn't try to hide his sobs and all three boy looked at each other with watery eyes and broken hearts. Alex was left lying cold at the door, the faint ringing of sirens neared and Luke looked like a deer in headlights.

Calum joined the trio and gave Michael the worn out blanket he had found upstairs. Michael forced his hands to stop shaking as he threw the material around Luke's body holding him close.

The boys small body was in Michael's arms as he cried into his chest. Michael held Luke tightly making sure not to hurt him.

Blue and red lights flashed through the streets. There was shattered glass on the floor, blood staining the walls and on Ashton's hands and there were millions of untold stories between the four walls. The light was intense and lit up the entire street and the front room and Calum turned to see the arrival of the police.

The world was cold but inside the troubled house it was colder and Michael looked down at Luke smiling through his pain. 

"You'll be alright Luke. He's not ever, coming near you again."


	35. In Each Other’s Arms

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My favourite part was when they were in bed, trying to sleep, what’s yours?

Ashton was arrested for the harm he had caused Alex but was soon released. The bruises on Luke's body said it all. Michael hid the younger boy away from the harsh reality and the police officers looked at Luke sympathetically.

Luke had been in hospital for a few days. He was on the track to recovery. The house in front of Michael's was abandoned and lonely as Luke stayed at his. He would return to his house some day, but not right now. The memories were too fresh and he was still recovering.

The younger boy had nightmares all night and cruel thoughts invaded his weak mind all day. Michael just prayed for Luke to be okay.

Luke slept beside Michael at night but there was a huge space in between them and some nights Michael was tempted to break the barrier and hold Luke dearly, telling him how brave he had been but he was too scared.

Michael just couldn't sleep. He couldn't rest his mind, he was too scared. The boy had no idea what was frightening him and he would often force his eyes shut but they would open again, mostly because of Luke. The blue eyed boy woke up every night: a tangle of limbs beside Michael and he would spend his nights reassuring the blond that he would be okay now. Michael spent most of his time on Luke; watching him; caring for him; missing him.

Michael rubbed his face, groaning as he lay down. But then Luke jolted up- frightening Michael. He thought he would have been used to it by now but each day it got worse.

Luke had his hands spread out beside him, desperately searching for someone. Once he realised it was just the two of them, he would climb onto Michael's lap and cry into his chest. Michael held him every night. He wished that some of Luke's pain would transfer to him so Luke wouldn't be going through it all by himself but the world was injust. Michael had learned that a long time ago but as he watched the person he wished would love him back, it hit harder than ever.

Some nights, Michael would cry silently in the shower or in bed beside him- making sure Luke wasn't aware of his breakdowns but this time he allowed himself to expose his weak side.

***

Luke raised his head to see Michael's pink cheeks coated with tears. His green eyes glassy as he sobbed and Luke knew the two mirrored each other in appearance. He raised his hand, wiping the tears away for himself before doing it to Michael and Michael tried to smile for the younger boy. Luke could tell it took him some effort so he gave him a soft smile too.

"Don't cry Luke, you're too pretty to cry."

And Luke wanted to cry again because Michael was so warm-hearted. He was so accepting. Luke thought someone like Michael could never be sad but here he was, on Michael's lap wiping his precious tears away. Luke hiccuped making Michael smile slightly.

"So are you Mikey." Luke responded, watching the spark in Michael's eyes twirl like the smoke he had seen too many times leave his lips.

"You're prettier than me." Michael said simply and Luke looked away embarrassed.

"No I'm not." He said quietly and Michael disagreed, "You're absolutely gorgeous Luke." Michael whispered brushing Luke's hair away, "So fucking gorgeous."

His quiet voice made the moment so intimate. Michael enjoyed the touch of Luke's hair and Luke enjoyed the feeling. The caring gesture was foreign to the blond and he wondered if this was what a normal relationship felt like. Luke shrugged sadly making Michael sigh, "Look at me Luke."

He raised his head, slightly avoiding the emerald eyes and soon Michael placed a finger under Luke's chin forcing their eyes to meet. 

Luke had no idea why he suddenly felt so nervous around Michael. The air around them was thick and Luke felt like he couldn't breathe or think because Michael was so intrusive. Slowly, the older boy rested his head against Luke's and Luke was forced to close his eyes for a second so he could control himself.

Michael's fingers caressed Luke's cheeks making his eyes flutter open and Michael smiled beautifully. Luke studied his eyes, loving the different hues of green mixing to make Michael's green and Luke swore he had never seen anything so beautiful.

"I f-feel better now." Luke stuttered and Michael pulled away smiling at Luke to hide his disappointment. 

"We should get some sleep." Michael mumbled and Luke nodded. Michael carefully lifted Luke off his lap and onto the space beside him and then switched the lamp off. Luke was hidden in the darkness. He felt safe.

Michael held up the covers allowing Luke to slide in. Their bodies were far apart and Luke decided to break the dam containing his emotions and he moved closer wrapping around Michael.

He couldn't see the huge grin on Michael's lips but he hoped there was one. Because he was smiling too.

***

Luke had long gone to bed, Michael knew how knackered he had been the last few weeks and he was happy the boy was resting. But Michael's mind was still buzzing from the moment earlier. He turned to his side, pulling Luke in closer loving the warmth from both their bodies. 

Michael wished the light was on or that the curtains were drawn because he wanted to admire the beauty in his arms. Michael always looked down on relationships thinking that the other person would always tie you down to something. But he felt the toll leave his body and he had seen how free Luke was now. Maybe love wasn't as bad as he thought it to be? How had he lived so negatively before?

He didn't want the sun to return to its position in the sky, because he knew they'd have to get up and out of bed. Michael wanted to stay in bed with Luke in his arms forever.


	36. Breakfast

Michael had slept for a few hours before he woke up. Groaning, he rubbed his eyes and noticed Luke. The boy was cuddled up to his side, head hiding in Michael's neck. Michael smiled to himself sleepily before carefully getting out of bed. He looked at Luke one last time before trudging to the bathroom. He ran a hand through his messy hair and brushed his teeth and washed his face. He got dressed and decided to shower later on.

As he entered the kitchen he frowned. What would he make Luke for breakfast?

Michael was a shit cook. He drank tea or coffee in the morning and sometimes had a bowl of cereal. Other days he'd opt for toast but somehow managed to burn that. 

He leaned against the counter sighing and pulled out his phone. Luke seemed like a sweet person, Michael still remembered the day he made him hot chocolate. Maybe he'd like pancakes?

He searched the recipe up and grinned when he checked for the ingredients and had all of them. He made the batter which was easy enough but he may have added a little bit more sugar. He poured the mixture onto the pan and watched it cook. His phone said too wait a few minutes but how long was that? 

Michael rinsed his finger and poked the pancake watching it bounce back up. He flipped it around and grinned widely seeing that it was a pretty gold colour. Maybe he wasn't as bad he thought he was.

Whilst waiting, he distracted himself on his phone checking his messages and Instagram and his eyes widened as he checked on the pan.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!"

He grabbed the pan and yelled when it burnt him. "Stupid piece of shit." He cursed and grabbed a towel before carrying the pan and throwing the burnt shape into the bin. 

He put his phone away and started another batch, hoping that it'd work out better this time.

***

Michael's tongue poked through his lips as he placed the last pancake on top. He cheered at the result. It was perfect! Well except for the melted cream. He had put some whipped cream on the plate before, in excitement, but it had melted so he kept putting more which also kept melting. Michael decided to put the pancakes on top of the cream to hide the mess.

He threw the spatula in the sink and poured a lot of syrup before putting more cream to make it look pretty. Michael was beyond proud of his creation. As he looked at the messy, golden stack he frowned, something was missing. 

He rummaged through his fridge and pulled out some strawberries. He didn't remember buying them so he ran them under the tap and popped one in his mouth. They were still good- so he adorned the plate for Luke. 

Looking at it, he realised he didn’t want it to be eaten so he took a quick picture. Just as he put his phone away he heard a soft voice.

"Mikey?"

The blue haired boy stood up and saw Luke standing in the doorway. The sweater he had slept in was so big and ended slightly above his knees- his hair was messy from sleeping. He looked adorable to Michael and the boy wished he could take a picture of that too.

"Hi. I made breakfast." He said, suddenly nervous.

Luke's blue eyes flitted to the plate on the counter and his eyes gleamed. 

"Is that for me?" He asked and Michael nodded.

Luke took small steps towards the island in the middle of Michael's kitchen and sat on the stool. He looked at the plate, eyes softening.

"I'm not good at cooking." Michael blurted out and Luke chuckled softly.

"It looks really good."

Michael didn't believe that, "It really doesn't. You've probably cooked better."

Luke shook his head looking up at the boy, "No it does look good. I promise Mikey."

Michael blushed and Luke picked up his cutlery frowning.

"Where's yours?"

Michael went a beetroot red, fuck he didn't make any for himself. 

Luke looked at Michael and shook his head in amusement. He held back a giggle and pushed the plate forward.

"We can share."

Michael stepped back stammering, "N-no I'm good. I ate earlier."

Luke laughed at that and Michael suddenly smiled. Luke was laughing. Michael could be an idiot for Luke everyday if it meant he’d get to see him laugh.

"No you haven't. Please eat some, I don't mind." He said earnestly making Michael nod reluctantly. 

He sat down and started eating with Luke. Luke took the first taste and moaned quietly to himself, "It is good Mikey."

He dug into the food in front of him and held the fork out for Michael. Luke looked at him expectantly and Michael leaned forward taking the food in. Surprisingly, it was delicious and Michael couldn't stop the smile on his lips which only made Luke beam.

The two boys carried on eating and Michael was so happy that Luke was making an effort. He knew Luke would have put the fork away by now because he had a small appetite but he insisted to eat more for the green eyed boy and if that didn't make Michael's day he didn't know what would. 

Michael stood up pouring juice for the two before handing Luke his glass. 

"Thank you for eating it Luke." He said suddenly, catching the boy’s attention.

Luke blushed slightly and nodded. 

He sipped on his juice as Michael finished the rest. The older boy got up, putting the plate away. He ran the water starting to clean the dishes when the doorbell rang. 

Michael turned around to see an alarmed Luke. He was looking back at the door and Michael could see his body tremor.

"Luke." Michael said catching the younger's attention, "You're okay, yeah? I'm here, I won't let you get hurt." 

Luke nodded slowly and Michael smiled back at him reassuringly.

"I-I can go get i-it?" He asked and Michael nodded hesitantly. "Okay Luke. It's probably Calum, don't worry."

Luke turned around and walked out of the room but Michael still feared for him so he rinsed the soapy suds off his hands and dried them quickly, walking out into the hallway. 

It was Ashton.

Ashton was hugging Luke so tightly that his feet were hovering off of the ground and Luke's arms were also wrapped around Ashton. Head hidden in his neck like how it was when he slept beside Michael.

Michael knew that they were just friends and he wasn't jealous of the golden haired boy. He just wished that Luke would be like that around him more often.


	37. Lessons

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave me comments!

All three boys were sat on Michael's couch. Michael on the left and Ashton on the right. Luke was sat in the middle, legs crossed. The trio were watching something aimlessly on the TV until Luke stood up. 

"I'm going to get dressed if you don't mind." He said quietly. Ashton shook his head. 

"I left a toothbrush out for you if you didn't already know. Just wear anything of mine." Michael said kindly, "We'll get you your clothes soon."

Luke nodded and slipped out of the room. Ashton sighed and switched the TV off facing Michael.

"How is he?" He asked.

"He's getting better." Michael said, "Eating well." 

Ashton smiled at that and Michael did too, "Still the same old Luke. He gets scared at loud noises. When you knocked he got scared. I had to reassure him he was okay and then he offered to open the door. God, I hate that bastard." 

Ashton grimaced and then his phone pinged. He read the text and put it away. 

"Calum's coming over, he should be here in two minutes."

Michael nodded and then small steps could be heard on the stairs. Both boys stood up and walked towards the door. Luke was dressed in skinny jeans and a sweater. His black lip ring still in place. Michael was glad he was wearing the warm clothes, he didn't want Luke to get sick. Michael also loved seeing Luke in his clothes. 

The doorbell rang and this time Luke didn't jump but the other two boys sensed his uneasiness. 

"It's Calum. He said he was coming 'round."

Luke nodded and Michael stepped closer to him, it seemed to calm him down and Michael smiled to himself.

Calum stood at the door, grin on his lips as he looked at everyone.

"Oh my god you all were waiting for me! I feel so loved!" He said, making Luke giggle and Michael and Ashton roll their eyes fondly. Ashton kissed his boyfriend quickly, making the dark haired boy blush. Calum turned to Luke with a smile and hugged him tightly.

"Why don't we go out instead of staying in?" Michael suggested.

The two boys agreed but Luke was hesitant. All were aware of it but knew that it would benefit him.

"You'll enjoy yourself Luke." Calum said and Luke bit his lip.

"We don't have to if you don't want to." Michael said but Luke didn't want to disappoint the others so he nodded. Ashton grinned widely. He kissed Luke's cheek making him blush and Michael just sighed. Calum spotted this and nudged his friend, ‘give him time’ he mouthed and Michael nodded.

***

Calum and Ashton were in the back of the car and Luke was outside with Michael, waiting for him to lock the door. 

"You sure you okay?" Michael asked and Luke nodded.

They walked down the pathway and Michael got into his car, hands placing themselves on the wheel and he frowned when he noticed Luke was still outside. The blond was looking at the house across the road. 

"When do you think he'll move on?" Calum asked and Michael heard Ashton sigh. 

"I really don't know babe."

Michael opened the window and called out for Luke. The boy blushed and got into the car quickly.

"I'm sorry I didn't-"

"It's alright Luke, stop apologising."

Michael started the car and tapped Luke's thigh.

"You wanna put the radio on?" He asked and Luke shrugged.

Michael put the volume up and Luke pressed a random radio station not really into it. 

"Hang on wait." Michael leaned over and opened the dashboard to reveal several CD's.

Luke looked at them in wonder and Ashton noticed. He smiled widely, "Go on Luke, pick one of our favourites." 

Michael drove on smiling happily and occasionally watching to see if Luke had decided and he heard Ashton cheer as he finally chose one.

Luke took his time putting the disk in but then Green Day started playing and Michael looked at Luke. Both boys shared a moment smiling at each other and the two in the back didn't miss it.

"This is great!" Calum exclaimed, "We're so cool!"

Michael ignored the boy whilst Ashton groaned. "Babe you can't say you're cool, that's just not cool."

Luke giggled and Ashton eyed him in the mirror happily. Calum pouted at his boyfriend but he could sense the happiness he was feeling. Calum loved how caring Ashton was and how he looked after Luke. So he leaned over and placed a big kiss on his cheek making Ashton blush and turn to hug Calum tightly.

***

"He's cute!" Calum exclaimed pointing to a stranger with brown hair. Ashton had a frown the whole time as Calum pointed out strangers for Luke to look at. Michael was just mad at Calum and Luke felt awkward.

Calum would point at random strangers for Luke to comment on and Luke would only blush knowing that Michael was listening to everything.

"What about him Luke?" Calum said licking his spoon.

The four were in a cute ice cream shop because Ashton had sudden cravings. Luke and Michael sat opposite Calum and Ashton. 

Luke turned his head and nodded half heartedly, "I- I guess."

Michael growled quietly and sat back, knees spread apart and Luke gulped when Michael's knee touched his. He quickly glanced down and then looked back up. 

Luke didn't want an ice cream so Michael insisted Luke have some of his which he had reluctantly agreed to. Michael, Luke and Ashton had since finished theirs but Calum was still licking the sweet treat and Ashton was becoming impatient.

"Come on babe lets go." Ashton complained and Calum pouted. "But I haven't finished."

"You can eat on the way home." Ashton said and Calum still looked sad, "But I'm helping Luke."

Ashton looked at his best friend and then his boyfriend and sighed. Michael knew Calum was purposely making his boyfriend jealous and he rolled his eyes at his best friends antics.

"Well I think we should go." Michael spoke up, "I'm getting tired."

Calum frowned at him, "Just because you're getting jealous."

Michael blushed but stood up nonetheless wanting to leave. The other three boys followed and Michael grinned happily when seeing the scowl on Calum's lips.

Michael stayed close to Luke, not wanting to be away from him but someone came and banged into the younger boy. Luke stumbled and fell back, luckily Michael was there and he held Luke carefully, eyebrows furrowed in worry. 

"You good?" The stranger asked and Luke nodded looking back at the man. 

The guy didn't seem bothered as he looked at Michael but when he noticed Luke, his brows raised and his eyes shined.

"I'm sorry." He said reaching out and placing a hand on Luke's shoulder. Luke stiffened still not use to foreign touch but the stranger didn't notice this.

The blue eyed boy nodded quickly, letting him know it was alright but the boy was too busy chatting him up and it was making Michael angry. 

"-your number?"

Michael huffed and took the hand on Luke's shoulders and threw it away. "He's not interested." He said through gritted teeth but that answer didn't satisfy the stranger.

"He can speak for himself."

"Yeah well, I'm speaking for him because he doesn't want to."

The stranger was starting to get mad and Luke could tell. He stepped back in worry and Michael instantly wrapped an arm around his waist to comfort him.

"Come on Luke, let's go." Michael said keeping calm.

The stranger eyed their contact, "Wait you're together?! You're a fucking ass and you date a hot guy!" Michael glared at him harshly.

"Does that bother you?" Michael snarled and the stranger clenched his jaw. "He could do so much better." 

"What, you? He wouldn’t drop his standards for you.” Michael snarled, voice laced with venom and the boy backed off in slight fear. 

Luke had witnessed the whole thing and instead of backing away from the cruelness in Michael's voice he understood that this was how you protect people in your life. Not by locking them away and pretending to love them. No, you used your voice instead.


	38. Want

Michael drove the car in silence and for some reason he didn't mind driving. Normally, he'd get mad that he had to drive while the others could rest but for once he didn't.

Luke had been watching the world through the window quietly. It was getting late and the windows were slightly fogged. Lights from other cars and street lamps were bright and Luke looked at them yawning.

Michael saw how Luke's eyelids would droop and his thick lashes would kiss his cheeks. Luke forced himself awake but it was hard and Michael could tell. 

"Sleep. I know you're tired."

Luke blushed and fiddled with his fingers mumbling a thank you. He pulled his legs up and put on his hood, a little tuft of blonde hair peeking out. The pretty boy in the seat beside Michael was scrunched up into a ball, most of his body hidden by the sweater. He looked adorable like a kitten and Michael wanted to cuddle him forever and ever.

Calum and Ashton had been sleeping since and Michael turned back upon hearing voices. He saw Calum squished in the corner, head resting against the window. Ashton was everywhere. His body was sprawled all over the backseats, taking up the whole space and also leaning on Calum's body. Michael looked at them through the mirror with raised eyebrows. Ashton had one arm thrown over Calum so Calum wouldn't be able to move, but the Kiwi never did move while he slept. But from what Michael could see, Ashton moved a lot. 

The hazel eyed boy tossed and turned, his hands resting on Calum's lap, then his stomach and then it punched his nose. Calum protested and Michael snorted at how he was still sleeping. He focused his attention back onto the road and Luke.

"If you don't stop moving, I'll cut off your dick and throw it out the fucking window." 

Michael burst out into laughter at what Calum had said and the kiwi groaned. 

"Shut the fuck up Michael, I can't sleep."

Luke started to stir and Michael chuckled to himself quietly not wanting to wake him up.

"Cut off my dick and I won't be your boyfriend." Ashton suddenly spoke up.

"I don't give a shit."

"Stop lying you bastard, I know you'll miss me. You’ll miss the sex too."

"I won’t.”

Ashton snorted making his boyfriend glare at him, "Fine! Michael will have sex with me."

Ashton burst out laughing, "No he won't."

"I won't." The blue haired boy agreed and Calum frowned, crossing his arms.

"There's thousands of people that want me anyway. I'll find a real man." 

"Can you shut up now?" Michael hissed, worrying about Luke waking up.

"I am a man."

This time Calum snorted, "He'll have a bigger dick as well."

Michael was gripping the wheel praying that the two would shut up but Ashton wasn't having it. 

"What the fuck do you mean? My dick is big." 

Michael frowned in disgust and knew that Calum was messing with his boyfriend. 

"It could be bigger." Calum said nonchalantly.

"That's not what you're saying in bed." Ashton spat and Michael had had enough.

"Will you shut the fuck up? Luke's asleep."

"Fuck off Michael, we're discussing my dick." Ashton said irritated.

Luke opened his blue eyes and Michael noticed straight away. He glared at the two boys in the back, "I'll make sure none of you have a fucking dick when we get back."

Luke's cheeks turned a dark, shade of red and Michael found it adorable.

"I'll shut up 'cause Luke's awake." Cal mumbled and Ashton nodded in agreement, "Me too."

***

All four of them found themselves gathered around the TV again but not actually watching anything. Calum and Ashton, like usual shared the loveseat and Michael and Luke took the couch. 

They were just talking about random things that came into their mind and it felt nice to be a part of something normal for once. Luke yawned and lay down. Michael had pulled out blankets for everyone and Luke had a white one. Michael made it so Luke's head was on his lap and Luke secretly enjoyed it when Michael would run his fingers through his hair. 

His eyes were closed but he was listening to everything the boys had to say, humming gently when Michael would tug his hair or giggling at something funny that was said. Luke didn't know that Michael was admiring him the whole time and maybe it was best he didn't know, Michael thought.

Calum and Ashton had spent the time still arguing about Ashton's dick. Suddenly, Cal got up and switched off the light. Michael switched the TV on knowing that he wouldn't watch anything. It was just a distraction from the make out session Ash and Cal were having and he hoped it wasn't anything more.

Instead, Michael looked down at the angel. His skin was clear and soft, lips a beautiful pink and so plump. Michael wanted to feel Luke's lips against his. 

Luke noticed the silence and opened his eyes, blushing when he saw that Michael was watching him.

"Oops?" He said embarrassed, not really knowing why and Michael chuckled softly brushing his hair back. "Hi."

"Where are Cal and Ash?" Luke asked and Michael grimaced looking at them. Luke followed his gaze and heat filled his cheeks. Calum was sat on Ashton's lap, the two kissing like they had never seen air.

"Oh." He said making Michael chuckle to himself. 

"What do you wanna do?" Michael asked and Luke sighed.

Luke had something to say but he was too scared to say it out in the open.

"Nothing really." He lied, biting his lips and Michael found it really hard to stop himself from bending down to kiss the boy.

"Are you sure?" He asked and Luke shrugged.

The blond stood up, followed by the older boy and soon the two were outside in the cold. Michael stayed behind not knowing where Luke was taking them. It was cold outside and Michael shivered, looking at the sky. It looked as crisp as the air felt to his skin and he realised that the sky was so clear. It was easy to see the stars and he breathed out for Luke to stop and see them too.

Luke craned his neck, his eyes twinkling and lips slightly parted in awe but then he remembered why they were here and he looked away.


	39. Better Than Yesterday

Luke walked down the same sad hallways. All his memories with Alex came flooding back and instead of a day, it felt like years had gone since he last saw the man. He was aware of the footsteps behind him and suddenly he wished he came here alone so he could cry it all out.

He had just moved here hoping for a fresh start but this was the biggest change he had ever gone through. He felt so alone. 

Luke walked up the stairs looking at all the rooms quietly, Michael was too. But then he stopped outside their room, tears in his eyes. 

Alex's clothes were still on the left side of the wardrobe and his cologne's still took up all the space on their dresser. A shirt was hanging off the wardrobe door. The room overall was neat and tidy but Luke was a mess emotionally.

Looking at the room, you wouldn't think two people were living in it. There was nothing of Luke's that made it his room, he had no possessions visible. 

The bedsheets were still tangled and Luke walked forward seeing the slight spots of blood. 

He was hurt here. But he was also loved here.

Luke ignored the bad parts and reminisced all the times Alex had loved him here, on this bed. But for some reason it was hard, it all felt fake and Luke found himself questioning Alex's love.

Did he really love Luke or did he use him? Luke had spent all these years living a facade and pretending to people that things were fine and now he couldn't tell the difference between what was real or wasn't.

He clenched his eyes, stopping the tears and wished that he had someone to love again. It was foreign to Luke to have all this freedom and independence but he would never go back to the cage he had been locked in before. 

***

Michael stood outside the room awkwardly. He knew it was Luke's room he shared with Alex but looking around; it looked bare. Nothing in the room screamed out 'Luke' and that left Michael wondering.

Luke was standing over the bed and Michael was curious about Luke's thoughts. He fidgeted awkwardly until he heard small sniffs and he frowned.

"Luke?"

The blue eyed boys eyes were glassy and looked grey making Michael's heart crack. 

"What's wrong?"

Luke fell to the ground, hiding in his knees and Michael rushed over crouching down.

"I shouldn't miss him but I do." Luke cried. "He hurt me so many times but I can't forget him Michael."

Michael stroked Luke's hair not liking the sound of Luke crying. The younger boy had called him by his full name and that made Michael sad but not as sad as the boy in front of him.

"I spent so many years loving him and now he's gone. I want him back here with me but locked away so I can't get hurt again."

Michael pulled Luke onto his lap and held him close. Luke wrapped his thin arms around Michael, his tears wetting Michael's shirt but Michael didn't mind. 

"You'll find someone else to love Luke. He was taken away from you for a reason."

"I don't want anyone else." Luke mumbled and Michael sighed wishing that this was different. He didn't want his heart to be broken because he decided to fall for Luke but Michael couldn't control his feelings. 

"No one else will love me." Luke cried, "Alex didn't love me much either."

Michael pulled away and looked at Luke questioning him but Luke couldn't see the confusion in his green eyes since he was looking down. 

"It was a one sided relationship sometimes. I'd do everything for him and he gave me nothing. All I did was give and all he did was take." Luke admitted, "I still loved him because he would tell me he loved me and show me and sometimes I thought it was real. Why would he be with me otherwise?"

Michael shook his head sadly, wanting to leave the house right now and take Luke away from the negative environment.

***

"How did you meet him?" Michael asked curiously and Luke looked sad again. 

He looked into Michael's eyes and begged for acceptance. 

"Don't go." He said quietly and Michael's brows furrowed. 

"What?"

"Don't go." Luke said simply and Michael's gaze softened. 

"I'll never go Luke." And the blond only nodded in doubt. Michael was gonna show him that he would always be here for him.

"Will you tell me?" Michael asked and Luke nodded even though he didn't want to. He felt like he was obliged to let Michael know because the older boy had done so much for him. Luke felt like Alex, and he hated it.

"I was in hospital. My mum had died." He said quietly and Michael saddened straight away. 

Luke had been through so much with Alex already and alongside his mum had died too? That wasn't fair.

"It was always me and mum. No one else, but then she had just left me." He whispered.

Michael reached out for Luke and Luke flinched at first but then he realised it wasn't a bad thing. Michael wanted to hold Luke's hand but Luke wanted more. He wanted to be comforted because he knew he would break down again so he crawled into Michael's lap. If Luke stayed here then Michael wouldn't be able to leave.

He shyly intertwined their hands and played with Michael's fingers as he spoke. 

"I spent all my time in hospital crying and when the funeral happened I was a mess. I didn't eat or sleep and then I was put in hospital."

Michael pulled Luke closer comfortingly and wiped the wetness on his cheeks. 

"As I got better, they put me somewhere else with other people like me who were sad and I met Alex. He looked after me and came to visit me every day. He liked me." Luke said.

"What about Ashton?" Michael asked.

"We've been friends for ages. When mum died he was there and tried to make me better but it didn't work. He blamed himself while I was in hospital but I told him it wasn't his fault. And when I was sent away he came every week to see me. I love Ashton." Luke said quietly and Michael nodded wanting to thank the boy for being there for Luke. Michael could never be able to repay him. 

Michael slowly leaned in and placed a kiss on Luke's cheek making the boy flush at the sudden action. Michael wanted to pepper more kisses on his skin, all over him, but one was enough. He pulled away and smiled gently at him. 

"I'm so happy you're here Luke. I'm so happy you fought through everything, I hope you know how strong you are." Michael whispered and Luke nodded at him still shocked about the kiss.


	40. The Kiss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You’ll love me now and hate me later :)

Calum and Ashton had gone back home. Leaving Michael and Luke alone together. 

The two had finished breakfast and Michael sensed something different in the atmosphere. He didn't like it and wanted it gone. Luke was quiet all morning and now was sitting quietly on the counter, hands gripping onto a glass of water. His hair was still damp after his shower and appeared darker and Michael liked how it looked. It was a natural curly mess and fell out everywhere but it looked great on him.

Michael studied Luke and knew he was another kind of beautiful. He had the sharp jawline; messy, hot bed hair and plump lips Michael dreamt of kissing. Luke was undeniably hot and when he was nicely dressed with his lip ring Michael just wanted to ruin him. But somehow the younger boy always managed to be as cute as a puppy with everything he did. His smile was golden and his laugh always made Michael's heart race. Luke easily toyed with Michael's emotion without knowing it. He was innocent and in true honesty, Michael loved it.

"Penny for your thoughts?" He asked breaking the silence and Luke sighed, pushing his glass away. "I don't know. My mind's a mess."

Michael understood and then a great idea came into his mind. It led the two boys to be sprawled on the carpet, in the main room. 

Luke sat cross legged with his guitar held tightly and Michael studied him.

"Sing for me." He said and Luke shook his head in embarrassment. 

"Please?" Michael pleaded and Luke was unsure.

"I'm meant to teach you, not play." He said shyly and Michael fought a smile.

"Well you can teach me after. I wanna hear you play, I bet you have a great singing voice." He said making Luke blush.

"I-I don't know what to play." He mumbled and Michael hummed thinking about it.

"Have you wrote anything?" He asked and Luke nodded shyly. 

Luke wrote from his heart. He liked writing his stories and other people's stories and then turning them into something beautiful. He loved all his songs but there was one that was close to his heart. It was the only one Alex had never heard.

Luke wanted it to be like that. It felt like he owned it and he was too scared to share it. It was raw and real, and he didn't want it to be judged.

Michael would never judge him. And that made Luke happy. If he wanted, he could share his favourite piece.

"What's it called?" Michael asked curiously and Luke shrugged. 

"I couldn't think of a name."

He glanced at the tattered sketchbook beside him and then looked at Michael. He gently pushed the book towards him and Michael's eyes widened.

"Page 16." He mumbled and Michael nodded flipping through the book.

***

Pages and pages were filled with scruffy writing and lots of cross outs and it intrigued Michael. He wanted to take his time reading each word, studying each page and understanding Luke and everything about him. These pages didn't just hold songs, they held everything that Luke thought was important and Michael wanted to savour it. 

He finally found the page and read the lyrics.

"Can you sing it?" Michael asked and Luke took a moment before nodding.

He looked back down at the paper, his emotions overwhelming at the beauty of it. A little bit of Luke's heart was here. 

Luke's soft voice filled the room. His voice was heard over the tune of the guitar and Michael looked up. 

Luke's eyes were looking into his as he sang and Michael gulped. He was beautiful, he was so talented and Michael felt like crying. Because it was just too much. 

Luke's eyes were glassy as he sang. 

"But now that I'm broken.  
Now that you know it.  
Caught up in a moment, can you see inside?"

Michael looked down at the words, mumbling them to himself quietly.

"Cause I've got a jet black heart, and there's a hurricane underneath it, trying to keep us apart."

Luke put down the guitar suddenly making Michael look up at him in confusion.

"What's wrong?" He asked quietly and Luke shuffled away, pulling his knees up.

"I don't know." 

The air between the two was heavy and there was a deadly silence.

"What did you think?" He asked timidly and Michael looked down at the book collecting his words.

"I can't describe it." He admitted, "There's no words to describe it Luke. It was more than beautiful." 

Luke nodded and Michael frowned. He moved closer to Luke and tapped his knee.

"What's wrong Luke?" 

Luke didn't look up but he spoke, "It's my favourite."

"It's mine too." Michael said and Luke looked up, disbelief in his eyes but as soon as he saw Michael's expression, it vanished. 

"You haven't heard the others." He said. Michael shrugged, “I don't need to."

Luke had a small smile on his lips and Michael's heart started beating rapidly. All the organs in his body buzzed from the happiness Luke gave him and Michael felt faint.

"What should I call it?" He asked and Michael knew straight away. 

"Jet Black Heart."

Luke nodded and Michael let out a sigh, "Reminds me of myself."

Luke looked at him, a frown etched on his face. 

"What do you mean?"

"I'm not exactly a nice guy." Michael said and Luke disagreed. 

"You are to me." He said quietly and Michael sighed. 

"I'm a horrible person Luke. You don't know everything, and I wish I could change it but I can't." Michael confessed. "Your song, it means a lot to me."

Luke flushed at his words. 

"You're not a horrible person Mikey. You might have done bad stuff in the past but what matters now is that you're changing ."

Michael looked at him, hanging onto his words. "I'm not a good person."

Luke refused to believe that, Michael had done so much for him.

"You are. Without you, I wouldn't be here." He said quietly, "You saved me Michael."

Michael and Luke looked up at each other at the same time and Michael felt the same thing he felt last time.

He moved closer not wanting to scare Luke but Luke was distracted. He had a million thoughts in his mind and he didn't know what to do.

"Luke." Michael whispered and Luke's clouded eyes cleared for a second.

Luke didn't know if this was right or wrong. He didn't know if he wanted to or not but then looking into Michael's gorgeous eyes and seeing how close they were, he didn't want to ruin it.

Michael was hesitant as he leaned closer but Luke didn't move away and just as their lips touched Luke was glad he didn't back away.


	41. Full Of Regrets

Luke was trusting Michael with his heart and Michael held all responsibility. He would never hurt Luke, he would always protect him and expose himself to any kind of pain before Luke. 

This was moving too fast for Luke, he wanted to stop it but at the same time let it carry on because Michael made him feel so much in such a short time. 

Michael had pulled Luke closer, their lips still connected in a loving kiss and Luke shyly lifted his hands and wrapped them around Michael's neck.

Michael smiled into the kiss. This was all he had wanted, he couldn't believe he had it. He wanted to scream to the world that he was capable of love and that he had the most beautiful boy in his arms. 

He pulled back leaning his head onto Luke's. The younger boys eyes fluttered opened and Michael smiled at him.

"You okay?" He asked and Luke nodded.

***

Michael decided that he was shit at playing the guitar. They had spent a few hours working on strumming patterns, chords and easy tunes but Michael couldn't even hold the guitar right no matter how much Luke helped him. But to be fair, Michael was distracted by Luke and every time the blonde caught him staring he would blush brightly making Michael chuckle.

Luke packed his guitar and put his notebook into the zip of his guitar case and Michael let out a huge sigh. 

Luke looked around before going upstairs and Michael didn't know what to do. He walked around tidying up random mess than he plonked himself on the couch and switched on the TV.

One of his favourite shows was playing but he couldn't concentrate. He wondered what Luke was doing and he suddenly got nervous. He switched it off and decided to go upstairs to find him.

He wasn't prepared to see Luke on the bed crying and instantly his heart sank. Was it because of earlier?

Michael rushed beside him and reached out to touch him but stopped himself. 

"Luke?"

The boy kept crying.

"Luke, what's wrong?" Michael feared his response but nonetheless sat down on the bed beside him.

"I shouldn't have kissed you." He sobbed and Michael froze for a second. It took a while for him to process Luke's words but then it hit hard like a brick wall and Michael wanted to go in the bathroom and cry as well.

"I'm gonna ruin you're life like I ruined his. I'm dirty and not good, you can't like me Mikey." Michael's heart dropped at Luke's words.

"He just left and I kissed someone else. He's right I am a whore."

Dark shadows formed in Michael's eyes at the word and he let out a breath. "You're not a whore, Luke."

Michael reached out to touch the boy. Hold him and comfort him and make him feel safe. Michael just wanted to absorb all his pain; he was so fucking mad that Alex said that and made Luke feel this way. He was mad that Alex's words still controlled Luke.

Luke cowered away from Michael and his sobs were louder and it was getting harder to breathe.

"Please go." Luke sobbed, "Please Mikey. I can't do this."

Michael's eyes widened in shock and he shook his head desperately, "Luke please-"

Luke shook his head, harsh sobs racking his thin body and Michael nodded, telling himself that it wasn't his fault. Luke just needed some time. Michael could give him as much time as he needed, right?

***

Michael could give Luke time but he was getting impatient. Each passing second made him anxious and he didn't know what to do. His palms were sweaty and head hot and his hair was a mess. Michael had a pounding headache and he groaned to himself, switching the lights off. That was slightly better.

He stumbled down the stairs deciding to make some tea but the sharp hissing of the kettle was starting to annoy him. He was confused and lost in his own thoughts but the noises from the kettle were really frustrating him. Michael hadn't realised he had been gripping the mug tightly in his hand until he looked down. His knuckles were paper white and he growled before throwing it at the wall. 

The sound echoed through the ghostly hallways and he growled louder, kicking the shards. The sharp remnants tore his skin open and he watched quietly as the crimson blood leaked onto the pristine floor.

The kettle was still running and Michael hated it. He walked up to it, ignoring the soaring pain in his feet. He could feel the hot blood; a puddle at his feet but he was too focused on the kettle to deal with his injuries.

He grabbed the hot kettle cursing at the heat. He was sure he had burnt his hand but he still gripped it and threw it into the sink hearing it slowly sizzle and then it was quiet. He let out a sigh and examined his hand frowning at it. It was bright red and felt numb but Michael knew the pain would come back again and make him feel something.

He thought about his situation and how fucked up he was. He was leaning against the kitchen counter with a bloody foot, burnt hand and a deep longing in his chest.

Luke was poison.

But Michael was already tainted.

No, Luke had to be something else. He didn't take the life out of his body, Michael had already done that to himself. Luke was injecting him with something that made him human again. It left him more alive than ever. Michael's heart always pounded harder around Luke but the blond also left Michael feeling as if he been left, trapped on a rollercoaster. Tumbling all the way down but never reaching an end. Michael felt giddy and sick and didn't know if he was strong enough to deal with it.

Luke was too strong and unknowingly held all power over Michael. But Luke didn't care for that, he only had one man on his mind and Michael wanted to give up. 

He couldn't save the boy upstairs when all his life he was used to ruining people. Michael couldn't have Luke. It would never work. 

But when they kissed, it felt so fucking right. Luke's lips were made for Michael and Michael's love was just for Luke.

The slightest mention of the blue eyed beauty would calm Michael's demons. He wouldn't mind having his demons taunt him for the rest of his life if only Luke was the one who could make them go away.


	42. Full Of Regrets (Pt.2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a COPY of the PREVIOUS chapter. It won’t let me delete this chapter now so please just skip it :)

Luke was trusting Michael with his heart and Michael held all responsibility. He would never hurt Luke, he would always protect him and expose himself to any kind of pain before Luke. 

This was moving too fast for Luke, he wanted to stop it but at the same time let it carry on because Michael made him feel so much in such a short time. 

Michael had pulled Luke closer, their lips still connected in a loving kiss and Luke shyly lifted his hands and wrapped them around Michael's neck.

Michael smiled into the kiss. This was all he had wanted, he couldn't believe he had it. He wanted to scream to the world that he was capable of love and that he had the most beautiful boy in his arms. 

He pulled back leaning his head onto Luke's. The younger boys eyes fluttered opened and Michael smiled at him.

"You okay?" He asked and Luke nodded.

***

Michael decided that he was shit at playing the guitar. They had spent a few hours working on strumming patterns, chords and easy tunes but Michael couldn't even hold the guitar right no matter how much Luke helped him. But to be fair, Michael was distracted by Luke and every time the blonde caught him staring he would blush brightly making Michael chuckle.

Luke packed his guitar and put his notebook into the zip of his guitar case and Michael let out a huge sigh. 

Luke looked around before going upstairs and Michael didn't know what to do. He walked around tidying up random mess than he plonked himself on the couch and switched on the TV.

One of his favourite shows was playing but he couldn't concentrate. He wondered what Luke was doing and he suddenly got nervous. He switched it off and decided to go upstairs to find him.

He wasn't prepared to see Luke on the bed crying and instantly his heart sank. Was it because of earlier?

Michael rushed beside him and reached out to touch him but stopped himself. 

"Luke?"

The boy kept crying.

"Luke, what's wrong?" Michael feared his response but nonetheless sat down on the bed beside him.

"I shouldn't have kissed you." He sobbed and Michael froze for a second. It took a while for him to process Luke's words but then it hit hard like a brick wall and Michael wanted to go in the bathroom and cry as well.

"I'm gonna ruin you're life like I ruined his. I'm dirty and not good, you can't like me Mikey." Michael's heart dropped at Luke's words.

"He just left and I kissed someone else. He's right I am a whore."

Dark shadows formed in Michael's eyes at the word and he let out a breath. "You're not a whore, Luke."

Michael reached out to touch the boy. Hold him and comfort him and make him feel safe. Michael just wanted to absorb all his pain; he was so fucking mad that Alex said that and made Luke feel this way. He was mad that Alex's words still controlled Luke.

Luke cowered away from Michael and his sobs were louder and it was getting harder to breathe.

"Please go." Luke sobbed, "Please Mikey. I can't do this."

Michael's eyes widened in shock and he shook his head desperately, "Luke please-"

Luke shook his head, harsh sobs racking his thin body and Michael nodded, telling himself that it wasn't his fault. Luke just needed some time. Michael could give him as much time as he needed, right?

***

Michael could give Luke time but he was getting impatient. Each passing second made him anxious and he didn't know what to do. His palms were sweaty and head hot and his hair was a mess. Michael had a pounding headache and he groaned to himself, switching the lights off. That was slightly better.

He stumbled down the stairs deciding to make some tea but the sharp hissing of the kettle was starting to annoy him. He was confused and lost in his own thoughts but the noises from the kettle were really frustrating him. Michael hadn't realised he had been gripping the mug tightly in his hand until he looked down. His knuckles were paper white and he growled before throwing it at the wall. 

The sound echoed through the ghostly hallways and he growled louder, kicking the shards. The sharp remnants tore his skin open and he watched quietly as the crimson blood leaked onto the pristine floor.

The kettle was still running and Michael hated it. He walked up to it, ignoring the soaring pain in his feet. He could feel the hot blood; a puddle at his feet but he was too focused on the kettle to deal with his injuries.

He grabbed the hot kettle cursing at the heat. He was sure he had burnt his hand but he still gripped it and threw it into the sink hearing it slowly sizzle and then it was quiet. He let out a sigh and examined his hand frowning at it. It was bright red and felt numb but Michael knew the pain would come back again and make him feel something.

He thought about his situation and how fucked up he was. He was leaning against the kitchen counter with a bloody foot, burnt hand and a deep longing in his chest.

Luke was poison.

But Michael was already tainted.

No, Luke had to be something else. He didn't take the life out of his body, Michael had already done that to himself. Luke was injecting him with something that made him human again. It left him more alive than ever. Michael's heart always pounded harder around Luke but the blond also left Michael feeling as if he been left, trapped on a rollercoaster. Tumbling all the way down but never reaching an end. Michael felt giddy and sick and didn't know if he was strong enough to deal with it.

Luke was too strong and unknowingly held all power over Michael. But Luke didn't care for that, he only had one man on his mind and Michael wanted to give up. 

He couldn't save the boy upstairs when all his life he was used to ruining people. Michael couldn't have Luke. It would never work. 

But when they kissed, it felt so fucking right. Luke's lips were made for Michael and Michael's love was just for Luke.

The slightest mention of the blue eyed beauty would calm Michael's demons. He wouldn't mind having his demons taunt him for the rest of his life if only Luke was the one who could make them go away.


	43. Struggles

It had started raining at three and now it was five, in the morning.

Michael hadn't moved from his seat on the couch for the last few hours. His mind had been pacing as he was glued to his seat. His feet had cramps and his eyes stinged every time he blinked. 

Luke's cries and screams weren’t loud but Michael paid close attention. He could hear his agony from downstairs but he remained where he was. 

It was clear the younger boy was having nightmares, Michael could make out a few words like ‘stop’, ‘hurts’ or ‘please don't’ and it was heart wrenching to hear. His sobs lasted for a few minutes, then it'd be quiet, then after a while it'd start again. It was a repetitive chain and each time Luke seemed more in pain and Michael so badly wanted to end it.

There was a lot of objects sprawled on the floor; pillows messily thrown onto the couches; paper everywhere. It was a state. 

If Luke saw, he would be upset, maybe even scared but Michael didn't have the will to clean up the aftermath of his rage.

He slumped onto the couch closing his eyes. He just wanted some peace. Normally, he would have gone out but he couldn't now. Luke was upstairs.

A familiar tune started playing in Michael's head and he recognised it to be Luke's song. Michael didn't like singing, he hated it but he loved music. And he loved Luke's music.

Did Michael love Luke?

He let out an angry yell and got up switching on all the lights. The intensity of the lights caused him to wince but soon he had adjusted and looked around aimlessly before going upstairs. 

Walking into his room, he saw Luke's body scrunched up into a ball- tear stained cheeks. Michael looked away from the sleeping boy. 

He rummaged through his cupboards but he couldn't find what he needed. The blue haired boy slammed the cupboard door shut and leaned against the wall, breathing heavily.

Keep calm Michael. Get a fucking grip, you're better. You can't go crazy again, you've changed. 

Michael was scared, he didn't want to go back to his old ways. And seeing Luke's small body only made him worse and soon he was trembling against the wall. Fingers pulling at his hair.

Michael had lost control once before and he was so scared. Scared of himself, his mind and the power it had over him. 

"Can't can't can't cant." He whispered to himself, over and over again. 

Michael slid down the wall and then spotted a square paper on the floor. He reached over and picked it up letting out a huge breath of relief when he found it. It had fallen but that was okay because he found it now.

The green eyed boy looked sadly at the woman in the picture. Michael missed his mum, even if she wasn't the best mum there was. She tried to make him happy, she tried a lot. And that's all Michael could have asked for. 

His pale fingers softly traced the woman in the photo and he felt the familiar stone in his chest making it unable to breathe. He tugged his lip behind his teeth; urging himself not to cry. He was sad. He hated being sad. 

Michael had hid his past in the back of his mind, locked away tightly so no memories could resurface. He had been managing fine for years but now he had broken. Since Luke tripped into his arms that night, with big eyes and a bruised body, Michael's life had gone spiralling. 

He wished he had better control over himself or that Calum was here. Calum knew what to do, Calum was there when Michael needed someone. Michael looked at his hands in fear, he had done so much damage with them and he feared for the boy sleeping on his bed. He needed Calum to take him away and calm him down.

***

When Luke woke up, he spent a few minutes on the bed staring at the ceiling. His mind wasn't occupied, he just wanted to stay here for a bit. Relishing the peace and quiet. He sat up, feet dangling off the side and that's when he noticed Michael. The boy was on the floor, knees up and he was staring intently at him. Luke gulped and Michael gave him a small smile before looking back down at the picture in his hands. Luke couldn't see who was in the picture.

He looked at Michael's small body and noticed the messy hair and red eyes. It wasn't hard to tell that Michael hadn't slept at all and now he looked like a sad schoolboy. He looked so broken and weak and that made Luke sad. Luke could see himself in this new version of Michael and he didn't like it at all.

The tension between them was thick and Luke thought back to last night. He had barely slept due to the terrible nightmares. The rain was falling hard and it reminded him of the night in the park, with the scary man that abused his body.

Tears sprang in his eyes and he began scratching at his skin. Luke had been abused mentally and emotionally because of Alex and his body had been abused for the pleasure of others. Luke really was a doll; a glass one.

He felt dirty all over and no matter how many tears ran down his body, he never felt clean enough. Never enough for anyone and he wished he had a better life. A better version of himself.

He clawed at his arms, angry red marks on his pale skin but it looked better that way. Hot tears splashed onto his red arms, and he watched them, fascinated. He could feel the tears slide down his cheeks, tickling him slightly and curving around his nose.

He sniffed and heard some movement in the back but didn't look up. His hair had been growing back slightly, a mess of curls and waves and it hang down like a curtain.

Luke heard his name being called softly and he clenched his eyes shut.


	44. Progress

Luke had showered but still felt impure and he hated it. He was huddled on the floor, staring blankly at the screen. Michael had been quiet all day, he was watching the film too, unlike Luke, but the blond knew his mind was somewhere else too.

There was no communication between the two except for eye contact and Michael urging Luke to eat more at lunch. Luke had been wondering who was in the photo Michael was looking at earlier but he never asked. He just sat quietly, nibbling on his lips. The curtains were closed but only because Michael knew Luke would spend his time watching the lifeless house across the street. 

Luke felt selfish, he was an intruder in Michael's home. He had been to self absorbed worrying about himself that he never asked Michael. He confused himself and Michael when they kissed and he wished he could do it all over again, but this time make things right. He wanted to kiss the boy again but he also wanted to run away. He hurt Michael and as much as he liked the blue haired boy he knew that he couldn't be with him. Michael would scorn him after finding out that he had given his body away to someone else numerous times. Luke would rather save himself the pain.

Anxiously, he stood up knowing he had caught Michael's attention. 

Luke looked over at Michael and was shocked to see an overboard of emotions hidden behind the surface of his emerald eyes. They were so dull and lifeless and Luke hated that he was the cause of it. Michael's eyes should be pretty and shiny all the time, he thought.

The two held eye contact, Luke wanting to turn his head away because Michael's gaze was too intense but he couldn't bring himself too. He looked at Michael and how sad he was. But he still looked breathtaking to Luke and he wanted to make things better again. 

***

Michael had been ignoring the buzzes from his phone. They had stopped after so long and he knew Calum had given up for now. He'd be back soon and Michael was dreading it. He had wanted Calum before but now he knew that Calum wouldn't be able to get rid of all the pain.

Michael had been staring at Luke and despite the sadness in his body, his heart still fluttered and he felt lovesick. He really was so pathetic. 

Luke looked hesitant as he walked over and sat on the couch. Michael was glad he was off of the ground, it couldn't have been comfortable.

The younger opened his mouth to speak but then closed it shut, tugging his lips behind his teeth. Michael could see the conflicting emotions in Luke's sky blue eyes and he turned his body slightly to face him.

The blond averted his gaze to the sleeves of his sweater and sighed, running a hand through his messy curls. 

Michael loved Luke's hair. It was so shiny and soft and was a soft blonde that seemed to darken when wet. It was very curly and crazy and adorned his face perfectly. Michael loved seeing it out of place when he came out of the shower he looked adorable and innocent but also hot. Michael couldn't figure out how Luke managed to do that but he had no complaints.

Suddenly Luke spoke, "I'm sorry." 

Michael watched the boy quietly, letting him speak.

"I-I'm sorry for s-staying here instead of at h-home." He breathed. Michael frowned at Luke's words but didn't speak knowing the the younger had more to say. 

"I didn't mean to make you sad. Don't be sad, please Michael. I don't like seeing you sad." Luke was sitting on his knees on the couch and was nervously playing with a loose string from his sweater. His fingers picked at a hole making it stretch out. Luke was waiting for a response and looked up when Michael still hadn't spoken.

Looking into Michael's eyes he let out a shaky breath. "Michael?"

"No." Michael said quietly, his slightly faded blue hair moving as he shook his head. Luke smiled hesitantly at the action. 

"It's Mikey. You never call me Michael, Luke, it's Mikey. I like it when you call me that."

Luke looked at him in slight shock and saw the faint blush coated on his cheeks. "I'm sorry." He said and Michael groaned. 

"Stop being sorry Luke." He said and Luke only nodded wanting to say sorry but he stopped himself.

"I didn't mean to push you away." He mumbled quietly, "Y-you know when."

Michael nodded straight away understanding that he was bringing up the kiss. He internally awed at Luke's innocence. "That's okay Luke, don't be scared. It's okay if you didn't want me to kiss you." 

Luke shook his head no, "It's not that."

Michael perked up at his words, "So you did want to kiss me?" He asked eagerly and Luke's cheeks were on fire.

"Sorry." He said awkwardly, scratching his neck. "I didn’t mean to throw that on you."

Luke only nodded but Michael could see the difference in his body posture and attitude. 

"I should go." Luke said confusing Michael. "Huh? What do you mean go? Where?"

Luke sighed and looked away, "Back home."

"What?!" Michael exclaimed and Luke flinched at the sudden raise in his voice. "You mean across the road? Why do you wanna go back?!"

"D-don't be m-mad." Luke whispered and Michael's eyes widened. 

He got up and slowly walked towards Luke. The blond looked down at his fingers again, too scared to look at Michael and Michael knew he should have handled himself better. 

He crouched down and placed his hands on the couch beside Luke's.

“Luke, I didn't mean to scare you." Michael said quietly and Luke nodded but his body stayed closed in, guarding himself and Michael bit his lips. 

"Can you look at me?" He asked hesitantly. Luke slowly looked up, avoiding Michael's eyes. 

Michael gave him a reassuring smile and hesitantly moved his hands closer to caress Luke's smaller ones. 

"I'm not mad. I was just-" He let out a breath thinking for a word, "Surprised." 

Luke gained the confidence to look into the green fields of Michael’s eyes and spoke up, "So you're not mad at me anymore?"

The older boy chucked, "I was never mad at you Luke. I was-"

Michael didn't know what to say.

"Sad?" Luke asked and Michael shook his head, lying.

"Scared?" Michael didn't deny it and Luke soon realised that the boy in front of him was in fact, hiding a lot of his emotions.

"Confused?" Luke whispered and hesitantly, Michael nodded. 

The two boys sat in silence as Luke said words that both had felt.

"Sad?" Luke asked again peering up at Michael and this time, Michael slowly nodded. 

"I was scared that I upset you Luke. I didn't want you to go." Michael admitted and Luke asked why.

"You're so different Luke. I've never met someone like you. You're so pretty and innocent and somewhat content with whatever shit life you were given." Michael frowned, "You didn't deserve it and you know that. You just took it as it came and you still worry about others and you're just such a beautiful person, inside and out. You're fucking gorgeous Luke, do you know that? Being with you is so all I want, it makes me so happy. You make me happy. And now I want to make you happy."

Luke cheeks were ablaze and Michael noticed, chuckling to himself. 

"I didn't want to hurt you. I always end up hurting the people around me." He said quietly, eyes clouding with emotions. Michael seemed like he was a thousand miles away and Luke wanted him back.


	45. The Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fave 5sos song?? I also wanted to remind you that I do not own any of the characters, I only own the storyline.

"You won't hurt me." Luke breathed out confidently.

"You don't know that." Michael insisted and Luke felt him stiffen. Michael doubted himself so much, he was so afraid of himself and Luke wanted to know why.

"I do." He said simply and Michael moved away gripping his hair. Luke watched him worriedly and wanted to reach out to touch him. 

"Micha- Mikey?" He called and the boys head snapped up. 

"What if I hurt you Luke?" He whispered and Luke frowned. 

"It's okay Mikey." He said and sat up so he could reach out to the frightened boy.

Michael watched Luke's hand reach out to touch him and he shook his head. Luke didn't listen and hesitantly placed his hand on Michael's cheek, stroking it. Michael couldn't stop himself from leaning into the touch but then he backed away. 

Luke pulled Michael closer and placed him on the couch, sitting beside him. Michael looked at Luke, the dear so evident in his gorgeous green eyes. 

"What's wrong?" Luke asked softly, wanting to make Michael feel as comfortable. Michael had done the same for him and Luke was so thankful for it 

"Everything." Michael stated, "Everything but you Luke. I don't want you to know." He confessed and Luke frowned. 

"You don't have to tell me." He said and was interrupted by Michael, "But I want too."

"Why don't you?" Luke asked, "What's stopping you?"

Michael ran a hand down his face and breathed out, "It's me Luke." He let out a growl, "That sounds so fucking cliché and overused. But it's true. Fuck! I don't know anymore."

Luke looked at the mess of a boy and hesitantly moved closer. Luke was hesitant with a lot of things. Alex's abrupt mood swings made him this way, Luke always had to be on the watch and always do the right thing. Alex's rage was better avoided.

Luke gulped before wrapping an arm around Michael. He was scared of Michael's reaction. Would he hug him back or throw him to the ground?

Michael froze for a second before he held Luke tightly to himself. Luke smiled happily, heart going crazy inside his chest and then Michael pulled back to look at him.

Michael had a lot to tell. He had been holding on for a long time, would he let go of himself for Luke? Would Luke leave? What if he was scared? There was so much for him to think about, what if he never saw the blue eyed angel again? 

"Stop thinking." Luke muttered pulling Michael out of his trance. "You've done so much for me Mikey, nothing you say will make my view on you change. Don't be scared."

Michael let out a sigh of relief and leaned his head against Luke's chest, breathing heavily. Luke's fingers slowly ran up his back and neck before stroking his hair. Michael sighed contently and looked up.

"You'll listen?" He asked and Luke nodded. "Of course."

***

"I don't have a family." Michael spoke. "Not anymore, anyway." He mumbled. "I had parents but they weren't parents."

Luke frowned in confusion and Michael chuckled to himself, "Sounds stupid, doesn't it?" Luke didn't answer.

"My mum and dad were fucked up from the start. My mum tried to be a good person, she really did, even though it was hard for her. She loved me." Michael said, his voice void of emotion. Luke listened on curiously.

"My dad wasn't a good man. He was addicted to drugs, alcohol and money." Luke winced at the list. Those three things did a lot of things to people. Money was blinding and the other two weren't great. Alex didn't take drugs but he did drink. Drunk Alex meant crying and apologies that Luke always fell for or rough, angry sex that ended up with bruises, broken bottles and tears. 

Luke shuddered at the thoughts, not wanting to cry. He was listening to Mikey now, he can't be selfish.

"He had a temper. A bad one, that's where I get it from. The drugs and drinking only made it worse. They were both addicts. Didn't give a shit about anything or anyone else, being high was their main priority. I don't know how I survived as a baby. They forgot about me most of the time, I stayed in the same crib for days on end I think."

Luke saddened at that, how could an innocent, fragile, little baby be treated so ruthlessly? 

"I'm sorry." He muttered and Michael shook his head, "Don't be Luke. It wasn't your fault, I'm okay now. It's just life."

"I grew up and saw the way things were. He never treated mum right, she'd have bruises. He was the one that made her like this. She had a good life, I heard the stories. She was studying for a degree, but she fell in love with a monster.

As I grew up, she learned more about me. We became closer. After the first time he raised his hand on me, she started crying and looked after my bruises. She cared for me a lot. I remember my first day of ‘big’ school, she was so excited. I came back home wanting to tell her everything but she was high and there was blood everywhere."

Michael's voice was lifeless; cold and empty but Luke saw the tears brimming in his eyes. The emotions hidden away made Luke want to cry. He wanted to tell Michael to let it all out because that was okay, it was okay to not be okay.

"One day she had an attack. She couldn't breathe and her body was trembling. I yelled for an ambulance but he didn't call one. Said that there was no saving her, she was gone. He was too scared of getting caught and he was out of it anyway, high on the drugs. He left and she died. I watched her die. I don't remember what happened after but the next time I saw him- I hurt him."

Michael looked away and Luke knew he was ashamed and scared but Luke wanted him to know that he would never judge him. 

"Mikey?" He said quietly, "I'll never judge you. I don't think I'm in the position too." Luke said trying to lighten the mood but it was a failed attempt. 

Michael's arms wrapped around Luke's waist suddenly and Luke blue eyes widened as he was placed on the boys lap. His thighs on either side of Michael's body and Michael's hands still holding his hips. 

Michael looked at Luke quietly and Luke found it hard to breathe. Michael's fingers were tracing patterns on Luke's hips and despite the thick material of the sweater, Luke's skin was on fire.

"He was taken into hospital because of me. The truth came out. Broken nose and bruises. I was taken away. I saw him one last time with blood all over him but the police saw it as self defence. I was young, scared. He died that night, the drugs made him weak. I didn't care."

Michael had been looking Luke in the eye the whole time, watching the way his pupils dilated in fear and how his lips parted and Michael wanted to kiss him so bad. Not only because he was Luke the cute boy with pretty lips but also because he wanted to forget for a bit. Luke always helped Michael be a little happier.

"H-how are you n-now?" Luke stuttered out and Michael shrugged. 

"Was that photo your mum?" He asked quietly. Michael nodded, her death anniversary hadn't been too long ago. He moved his hands from Luke's waist and reached into his pockets, pulling out the crumpled photo.

He looked at it before passing it onto Luke.

The blond studied the picture, Michael couldn't have been older than four. He was still pale but was small here. He had a toothy grin and his emerald eyes shone brightly. Michael's mum had him in her hands. She was smiling but you could see she was sick. Thin hair, skinny frame, hollow eyes. But she was happy too. It was evident in her eyes, the way she smiled revealed all the love she had for her son.

Luke looked up to see tears had escaped from Michael's eyes. 

"She's beautiful." He said quietly and the blue haired boy nodded, sniffing quietly.

Luke bit his lip thinking to himself and then he reached up wiping his tears. "You shouldn't cry. She's in a better place now."

"She should be here with me. I could have helped her get better!" Michael said bitterly. His cheeks were red and his eyes were glassy, he was trying so hard to keep himself together.

Luke shook his head sadly, "Some things happen for a reason."

Michael just stared at Luke. "I'm sorry about your mum." He said.

"Doesn't matter. She's much better now but I do miss her. I haven't gone to see her in years." He sighed and Michael nodded. 

"I could take you one day, if you want." He said quietly and Luke looked up in disbelief. 

"You would?" He asked excitedly and Michael nodded. "Of course."

Luke smiled widely and leaned forward wrapping his arms around Michael. He let out a breath as he tightened his grip. He could feel Michael's arms encircle his waist, pulling him closer until their chests were touching and Luke felt so happy and warm. He nuzzled his head in Michael's neck feeling so satisfied with how things were and he heard Michael sigh. 

"Thank you so much Mikey." He whispered not wanting to pull back but Michael did. The older boy placed his hands on Luke's thigh, looking at Luke so intently. Luke's lips were moving but Michael couldn't hear the words. 

"Mikey?" 

Michael looked down, blinking hard and then looked back at Luke. He had a little grin on his lips, the light in his eyes had returned. 

"You should smile more Luke, you look so pretty when you do." He sighed, "I missed you so much."


	46. Bad Things

Michael and Luke had gone back to sleeping in the same bed but like before, there was some space between their bodies. Michael didn't mind though, he was just happy that things had been sorted out between them. But Michael wished that they could kiss again. He really liked Luke. It was more than like, he knew that, but he didn't want to scare the boy. Besides, Michael was still coming to terms with his feelings. 

The two were sleeping soundly until Michael woke up. He groaned and stretched his body, sighing in relief. Michael turned to check on Luke and frowned when he saw him moving around. His hands were all over his body, like he was protecting himself. His facial expressions revealed his worry and discomfort. It was like he was being touched by something and he didn't like it. Michael's brows were knitted together in concern and he leaned over to switch on the lamp. 

Carefully, he woke the boy up. Luke's body jumped in fright and he huddled under the duvet, staring at Michael with wide eyes.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Michael asked quietly but Luke didn't speak. He was still stuck in his thoughts and Michael moved closer.

"Luke, what were you dreaming about?" He asked and the blond looked at Michael shaking his head. "It's not a dream." He said coldly and Michael nodded his head letting the boy know he was heard.

"So what happened?" He asked and Luke burst out crying. His tears were fast and unrelenting and Michael had Luke sat on his lap in a second.

The boy was a shaky mess and he clinged onto Michael's t-shirt. Michael never wore t-shirts whilst he slept but ever since Luke slept with him, he wore them to make sure the boy didn’t feel uncomfortable. 

The older boy tried to rub Luke's back but Luke recoiled from his touch so Michael stopped. "What's wrong Lu? It'll be better if you talk." He whispered. Luke looked up with glassy eyes.

"Mikey." He cried, sitting up. Luke’s knees were on either side of Michael's thighs like earlier. 

Michael held Luke's waist securely whilst the younger moved and hid his face in Michael's neck. He took big breaths, letting himself calm down and this time Michael could rub his back. 

"I feel hands everywhere. I hate it, they shouldn't be doing that." Luke whimpered and Michael's heart cracked. The man from the park came in Michael's head and he clenched his teeth. 

"Luke did he do anything else?" He asked making the blond pull back in fright. 

"Who?" He asked, fear paralysing his entire body making Michael look at him in confusion. "The man from the park that night."

Luke's eyes widened in realisation but Michael's body froze as he realised it wasn't just that once.

"Luke?" He began gently, "Was there anyone else?"

Luke looked at him in alarm, "N-no! No one Mikey. There was no one." He lied but Michael could see through it all. The blond jumped off Michael, scampering to the edge of the bed and hid his face in his hands.

"Who else?" He repeated quietly- whilst Luke kept shaking his head. His sobs were loud and his throat was sore.

Michael was quiet as he processed the thought of another persons hands on Luke. Another person violating Luke’s body, using him for their own purposes and hurting him beyond repair. He didn't know what to do, what to say.

"Luke, I'm sorry." He said quietly but Luke was persistent. He kept shaking his head, tears falling everywhere.

"Luke?" He tried again and Luke looked up at him.

"They won't go." He whimpered. 

"What? Who won't go?" Michael asked frowning.

"The hands. Every time I sleep, they're there. He's there. Make him go Mikey. Make it go."

Michael's eyes teared up. Luke’s words were so simple and so childlike. He was tarnished but still remained intact. So innocent and scared and Michael knew he would never want to stop protecting him.

The blue haired boy stood up and got off the bed, walking around to Luke's side and sitting down. Luke was still huddled against the headboard. 

Slowly, Michael reached out and placed his hand on Luke's knee making the crying boy jump. He lifted his hand up and Luke eyed it, Michael watched Luke as he watched him and then he placed his hand back down slowly. Luke didn't object, he had given his consent.

"Who's hand is it Luke?" He asked quietly and Luke remained silent.

"Doesn't matter." He mumbled.

"Okay." Michael said simply.

Luke stayed where he was but Michael was itching to pull the younger onto his lap. He contemplated it a lot and then finally he did. Luke gasped and looked around like an animal trapped in a cage. But Michael's hold was soothing and soon he fell against his chest.

"Why won't they go?" Luke mumbled making Michael sigh sadly. "I don't know Luke."

The older stood up, Luke's leg instinctively wrapping around Muchael’s body. The boy was blushing and Michael found it adorable, "Do you mind if we go down? It'd be better than being in this stuffy room." 

Luke shook his head, too tired to care and then closed his eyes relishing the warmth from Michael. His body trembled and he hiccuped quietly and Michael kept rubbing his back and stroking his curls trying to do anything he possibly could to make things better. 

The two were in the main room, the curtains drawn and a small lamp switched on in the corner. It was still mostly dark but comforting. Michael sat back on the couch with Luke still on his lap. Head resting against Michael’s chest and Michael's arms wrapped around him. Luke counted Michael's heartbeat, making his own match and he sighed contently. He was tired and the soft rhythm was easily distracting him. Michael's fingers drew circles on Luke back and he hummed quietly to himself. Luke could hear it and he liked it, he would make Michael sing for him. 

Their bodies were intertwined on the couch as they fell asleep.


	47. Questions

"What's going on in there?" Calum tapped Ashton's temple, breaking him out of the trance he was in. 

The golden haired boy shook his head with a sigh making his boyfriend pout. "Worried about Luke, that's all."

Calum placed a hand on Ashton's knee as he started the car. Ashton's fingers were tightly gripping the wheel and Calum lovingly stroked his knuckles, instantly making him loosen his hold.

"He'll be alright, Michael wouldn't hurt him." 

"I know that, but Luke hasn't been without Alex for years. As much as I hate to say it, without Alex, Luke will be scared. The bastard ruined him." Ashton snarled angrily. 

Ashton's anger made Calum wince. He didn't want Ashton to be mad. "I hate him too." Calum said quietly. "Maybe this will be good for Luke?"

Ashton shrugged, "I hope so."

***

The hushed words weren't in anyway quiet and it was beginning to annoy Michael. His hold on his pillow tightened and he soon realised that it was too hard to be a pillow. Michael didn't care though, it was warm and comfortable and he was tired.

"Michael!" The voice hissed making him groan. He tried to move his body but the weight on him restricted that. "Get up you ass."

Michael opened his eyes angrily and saw his best friend standing in front of him with a smug smile. He glared angrily and looked around noticing that he wasn't in bed. Michael looked down and saw a sleeping Luke in his arms. Last night came flooding back and he smiled to himself. The blond boy was still wrapped around him, head hidden in the crook of Michael's neck and Michael instinctively held him close.

"Finally, you're awake!" Calum explained.

Michael noticed Ashton standing at the back, lost in his thoughts. "What are you guys doing here?" Michael asked and Calum rolled his eyes, letting out an exaggerated sigh. "Came to check up on the two of you."

"Great, now go, we're sleeping." Michael mumbled before closing his eyes again.

"You're so fucking annoying."

With his eyes closed he spoke, "Shh, Luke's still asleep."

He could hear Calum swearing under his breath and Michael smirked slightly. Suddenly, there was a kick to his ankle causing him to yell.

"What the fuck was that for?" He exclaimed and Calum smiled at him smugly. "Shhh, Luke's asleep."

Michael was ready to pounce on the smug boy but then he heard a small sound and looked down.

Luke was awake. His blue eyes had fluttered open and were fixated on Michael. The sleepy boy gave him a small smile before mumbling a goodmorning. Michael smiled down at him, forgetting about the assault to his leg previously. His heart suddenly started to race and he felt like a teenager for a minute. 

The blond frowned and pressed his ear against Michael’s chest. He frowned softly, his bottom lip jutted out slightly, enough to form an adorable pout. “Your heart's beating a lot." Luke said simply, "Why?"

Michael felt the blush on his cheeks but he wasn't embarrassed. He wanted to tell Luke that it was because of him. Michael's heart always increased it's pace when he was around Luke. Colours intensified when he was with Luke, the world looked better and Michael suddenly knew the reason why he was brought into the world. Time spent with Luke seemed too short and everything became a blur. But not Luke, Luke was too beautiful to be a blur. He was the moon, beautiful and bright. He outshone all the stars in the sky, and there was a lot of them.

"I- I don't know." Michael lied and Luke nodded. 

The younger boy allowed his eyes to softly close as he placed his head back into the crook of Michael’s neck, sighing contently. His breaths tickled Michael’s pale skin and the older boy tightened his grip on the blond, biting down on his lips to contain his smile.

It was quiet for a few seconds, Calum’s eyes huge as he watched the interaction between the delicate boy and his not so delicate best friend. “Luke?” He called, “Hi!"

The blond peered up slowly and blinked before smiling widely at Calum. Michael watched the way his lips spread and eyes creased. He was so beautiful.

Slowly, the blue haired boy sat up and then placed Luke down carefully on the couch beside him. The blond slowly got up, hands stretched out to hug Calum and the kiwi grinned widely, rushing to hug him. The blue eyed boy didn’t seem to mind the fact that big Calum and Ashton had seen him sleep so comfortably on Michael’s lap or the fact that his blond curls were messy and tangled, falling out over his sapphire eyes. Instead, he gasped once noticing Ashton.

Ashton waited for Luke with a smile before hugging him tightly and kissing his temple like always. 

"Why are you guys here so early?" He asked quietly.

"Came to check on you Lu, how have you been?" Ashton asked, rubbing his best friend’s back.

"Better." He replied and all three boys smiled.

***

Calum and Luke were in the main room. The kiwi wanted to teach Luke how to play video games so Michael and Ashton were stuck washing up. The green eyed boy leaned back against the counter, waiting for Ashton to finish eating.

"Hey Ashton?"

The older of the two turned around with curious eyes. He had syrup laced around his lips and Michael could see why Calum was obsessed with the sight of him that day. His lips were plump and sugar coated with syrup, his hazel eyes shone in curiosity. They never seemed to stop changing colour. His wild, messy, golden curls were pushed behind a bandana. He was good looking and Michael worried if maybe Luke had feelings for him before.

"What's up?" Ashton said casually and Michael's body slumped. He wanted to tell Ashton about what happened last night but now it didn't seem like a good idea. It wasn't his story to tell. But Ashton was Luke's best friend. 

"Umm.." Michael fumbled over his words, "I was thinking of going back there. Get him some of his clothes and personal belongings."

Ashton's body visibly tensed at his idea. "What if he breaks down again?"

Michael sighed heavily worrying about that too, "We should break it to him. If he doesn't come we won't make him, I could go get it. I don't mind."

Ashton nodded along to his words. "Thank you Michael. You don't know how much it means to me, you know, looking after him. He's like my younger brother."

Michael nodded, he would never stop caring about Luke.

"So how has he been? I know he said he was doing fine but what do you think?" Ashton asked putting his plate in the sink. The two started to clear up the kitchen and start on the dishes. The loud sounds of the video games the two boy were playing could be heard and Michael was happy that their conversation would be drowned out.

"He's thoughtful. Sometimes he sits in the silence and looks out the window. At night he has nightmares, they keep us awake half the night but he's handling it better." Michael admitted. "Last night urgh.."

Ashton frowned at his hesitation. "What happened?"

"Well... he had a nightmare. We didn't speak for a few days. He just wanted to be lonely and cry. We sorted it out but he had a nightmare about hands all over him Ash, what happened to him?"

Ashton's skin was pale at the news, "The guy at the park maybe? We should tell the cops."

"No." Michael said firmly, "He doesn't want that now." Michael wouldn't disrespect Luke's decision, if he wanted to wait then that's exactly what they'd do.

"He thinks he's a burden. He wanted to go back."

"He did?" Ashton asked in surprise and Michael nodded glumly.


	48. Sad Memories

It was getting dark out. Luke had spent all day practicing the game Calum had played with him. He seemed to enjoy it and Michael didn't mind.

"Luke, how do you feel about going back? To get some clothes and other stuff?" Michael asked quietly and Luke's hands let go of the controller. Michael could only see his back so he had no idea what emotions Luke was feeling. 

"We don't have to, I just think we could get your clothes. They're a better fit and maybe some other stuff."

Luke's head lowered making the blue haired boy watching him, frown.

"O-okay." He stuttered.

"Luke look at me." Michael said getting off the couch and crouching down beside him. "I'm not gonna leave you there. No one will hurt you anymore."

Luke nodded and Michael could only hope he believed him.

Standing up, he dropped a hand for Luke to take. Their hand were connected; fingers intertwined and Michael had a small grin as he led Luke outside.

"I want to take you somewhere." Michael said quietly in the dark of the night.

Luke didn't respond but Michael knew he was listening.

"Wanna show you something."

Luke remained silent and Michael let it go, but then Luke spoke up. His small voice surprising Michael, "What is it?" He asked.

"You'll see, it's a surprise."

The pair walked up the path way, Michael couldnsense Luke’s uneasiness as he bet down to retrieve the house key from underneath the plant pot. Michael didn’t ask why Luke left it there, instead he just sent the boy an encouraging smile before he unlocked the door.

He couldn’t see much, but Luke took small steps inside, hands still gripping into Michael’s. The blue haired boy walked alongside Luke quietly, it was cold and dark. You could tell the house had been isolated for a while.

Michael kept a close eye on Luke as they went in further. He looked around for a light switch and soon the lights were on. Everything was in its place but the house seemed so different. It was just an empty building now.

Luke glanced around, his face blank like it always was when they came here or talked about Alex. Michael scratched his head standing there awkwardly until the guitar caught his eye. He walked over and held it in its case, "Should we take this back instead of leaving it here again?" He asked, "Maybe you can play gain for me." He said softly and Luke nodded. Michael gave him a comforting smile and walked up to the stairs. "Come on."

Michael allowed Luke to lead the way up. They both stood in Luke's old room, Michael staring bitterly at the bed. The house was cold and empty, nothing screamed out life or the warm presence of the blond boy. Michael hated it, it wasn't a home. It certainly wasn't Luke's home. It was a prison.

Michael had imagined Luke's house to be bright and tidy with picture frames on the walls and pretty flowers in vases on the table. A nice stand for his guitar and the curtains to always be widely drawn to let the sun in. More flowers in the front and the back and his room to hold all his possessions. Perfume, books, maybe some pencils if he liked drawing with Michael.

He decided to pull out Luke's clothes. He had a few black jeans, all ripped at the knee and Michael knew they would look great on his legs. He had a few simple shirts and t-shirts and some sweaters but that was it. No nice jackets or accessories like hats or nicer shirts. He frowned at that, he knew Luke liked to dress up. He saw it in the way he'd stare longingly at the outfits strangers wore when they walked by. Luke had a lip ring, which gave Michael an idea that he liked to dress nicely, not saying Luke didn't look great in what he did already wear. 

He turned around to ask Luke for help but stopped upon seeing him stand at the dresser. His fingers tracing the lid of a perfume bottle. He was staring at it so fascinated.

"Do you wanna take that too?" He asked softly and Luke looked up. He dropped his hand, taking a step back, like he was scared of being caught. He shook his head quickly and Michael frowned again. "You sure? You can take whatever you want Luke."

"It's Alex's." Luke whispered so quietly that Michael didn't hear. 

"What?" He asked making the blond sigh. 

“Not mine. It's Alex's."

Michael felt sad when hearing that but he didn't let it distract him. "If you like it you can have it, I'm sure he won't mind."

"Don't want it." Luke muttered sadly and Michael nodded. "Okay Luke."

The younger boy looked at the pile of clothes in Michael's hands.

"Is there anything else you wanna bring?" He asked.

Luke took small steps and bent down pulling out a box. He opened it slowly and inside were a new pair of black boots, silver stars decorated onto them. Much different to his tattered converse.

"They're really cool." Michael said and Luke smiled. "Thank you. Alex got them for me."

"How come they've not been worn?"

"I wore them. Only once though, I wanted to save it for a special day."

***

Luke thought back to that day. Alex took Luke somewhere far away to apologise. It was a great day for the two. They spent all morning running around the city looking for a place to eat breakfast then they went to a park. Alex wanted to take Luke shopping and that's when he bought it. Luke didn't know they were for him so he was really excited, he wore them right there. Alex used to like making Luke happy.

They got ice cream instead of lunch because they weren't as hungry and Luke felt like he was falling in love all over again.

When they arrived back to the hotel they made love. Luke loved Alex so it was okay. Alex wanted to have sex in every room even though Luke was hesitant. He was a bit tired and didn't want to cause trouble because he knew Alex liked him to be loud but Alex wanted it. So he did it.

He was worn out by the end of it and cuddled into Alex as he slept. But the next day he woke up to an empty bed and a puzzled heart. He stayed in bed waiting for Alex to come back but he never came. Luke stayed up all night waiting and waiting and then finally at five in the morning, the next day, the older man walked in drunk and buttons undone.

He glanced at Luke before using the bathroom and when he came out things were back to how they had been. Luke didn't question him, why break my heart again? he thought.


	49. City Lights and Confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A really sweet chapter about Michael’s feelings :)

Luke's clothes and guitar were left in the backseat as the two boys occupied the front ones. Michael had his favourite jacket on, with a beanie on his blue hair letting the longer strands at the front escape. Luke sat beside him in a pair of skinnies with one of Michael’s black shirt’s on. His new shoes on his feet.

Michael insisted they changed out of their old clothes, so here they were. The moon was at the peak of the sky. The blue haired boy left the windows down, allowing the cool night breeze to fill the car. It ruffled Luke's hair making it fall in waves looking like he just woke up. Luke lips were pink and plump from biting them and his skin looked pale. Michael wanted to hold his cheeks and kiss him softly, cherishing the feeling of their lips against one another again. 

There was a comfortable silence between the two, only the soft humming of the radio playing an overrated love song filled the empty spaces between them. Luke's fingers were absentmindedly running over the CD's Michael kept in his car and that made the older smile. 

He waited for a red light before he turned to the blond. "Do you want to put one on?"

Luke shrugged and moved his hand away, "I was just thinking." He admitted.

"About?" 

"I had some vinyls." Luke said quietly, "But Alex broke them."

Michael clenched his jaws but didn't say anything, he had a feeling that Luke would rather not talk about it. He leaned over and picked the cd Luke had in his hands and put it on.

The streetlights shone down onto the car, the creases of the wind could be heard as the speed of the car picked up. It was like they were on a stage; endless lights shining over them as the pair whizzed by. The song was quiet so Michael turned the volume up. It was thrilling just to be sat there, feeling the wind on your skin and in your hair. Opening your mouth and then regretting it because the wind dried it up, both Michael and Luke loved it.

The ride wasn't too long now and Michael couldn't wait. 

"Where are we going?" Luke's quiet voice asked and Michael smiled. "Somewhere that means a lot to me."

***

Finally they arrived.

Michael got out of the car, leaving the headlights on. He jogged to the other side and opened the door allowing Luke to step out, the latter blushing.

Michael watched Luke as he stepped forwards and took it all in. 

They were overlooking the city by a far distance. 

The city lights were on, making it look like a picture you see from a travel brochure. Luke held his breath in awe.

This is what made Michael feel alive:

standing at the edge, hearing his heart thump as the blood flow increased in his body. His fingers were numbed by the cold and his hair a mess caused by the wind. Chapped lips that needed to be licked and rosy cheeks. 

Knowing that if he took one more step forward he would plummet to the ground and that feeling of living would be ruined in a second. Michael was standing on the line between sanity and insanity and he fed off the buzz it gave him. 

He only came here a few times, each time he came, the feeling decreased. It gave him the rush but it wasn't enough. 

Luke was enough.

Being with Luke made Michael's body do more. His eyes wanted to feed off of Luke's body, never wanting to avert his gaze. Excitement bursting like fireworks making the tips of his fingers feel tingly as if they were sparklers and could leave a glow in the dark night. His heart was going crazy, like it was deprived of oxygen. Luke was Michael's oxygen, he settled the lines and made things clear again. He allowed Michael to breathe in the black mess of his life. He was willing to change for Luke because Luke was his sense of home. He was the compass that led Michael to safety. Luke somehow captured all of his heart, even the deep dark chambers that Michael had forgotten about and now they all lay out naked ready to be claimed. Michael had never felt so vulnerable, he just wanted Luke to love him and fill the emptiness in his body. 

And Michael wanted more than anything to do the same for Luke. He wanted to give Luke that same sense of love. Wanted Luke to feel alive like he did. He just wanted Luke's heart to keep beating but this time for a purpose.

"Luke." He breathed and the blond boy turned around. 

Michael was entranced with his eyes. The usual intense sky blue seemed to have melted into a bed of ice. Light blue but still striking, they looked so clear like glass and so deep like the ocean. Michael wanted to dive in and surround himself in the blue.

How had he ever thought that there was too much blue? How did he dislike the colour so? Now, all he wanted to do was stare into Luke's eyes and memorise each shade. He wanted to be trapped in his gaze because now he feared that there wasn't enough colour. He was scared that he'd never get enough time to admire his eyes before he was snatched away.

Fuck, Michael was so gone.

"What's wrong Mikey?" Luke spoke, his voice soft and sweet as always and Michael didn't know what to say. 

He took a step back, collecting himself and his thoughts for a moment. He didn't want to waste anymore time living in the dark. Not when he loved someone who was the definition of summer and waves and wind chimes. 

Luke was a work of art; better than any Van Gogh painting.

"I've got to tell you something Luke." Michael said rubbing his hands on his jeans. Michael was facing Luke, watching him closely. The headlights from the car were still shining brightly and the purring of the engine could be heard. The golden reflection from his cigarette box from where the light hit it caught Michael's eye and he suddenly felt very anxious. Usually, he'd reach for a stick and have a puff but now he's got something better to calm him down and Michael really hoped Luke wouldn't want to leave him alone, broken and scared.


	50. Fallin’ All In You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you know where the title is from, ily <3 There’s only 11 chapters left!!

Luke's heart was skipping beats. 

He had no idea what Michael was going to tell him but he hoped it was something good. He wasn't looking at the blue haired punk beside him but instead; admiring the view he had wanted to show him. It was so pretty and magical and Luke wondered how it'd look at dawn. Would there be beautiful shades of salmon pink; milky blues and softened yellows? Luke was positive it'd look like the kind of pictures Michael paints.

The older boy gestured for Luke to sit down in the passenger seat of the car and Michael stood beside him, the door opened so he could feel the air inside the car. The green eyed boy was bent down slightly so he could see Luke.

Luke watched him quietly, he could see that Michael was nervous. "Mikey?" He called quietly catching his attention. The older boy was hesitant as he placed his hand on Luke's knee. 

Blue eyes watched pale fingers fidget on his lap and finally Luke couldn't take it anymore and shyly intertwined their fingers. He had a small smile on his face as he touched Michael's hands and studied them and Michael was grinning so wide, his cheeks were sore but he wouldn't stop smiling.

Luke's hair fell forward and Michael brushed it back for him fondly causing Luke to look up allowing their eyes to meet. The light was making Luke's skin glow and his eyes a vibrant blue and Michael was so gone. 

"You look beautiful." Michael whispered loving the soft blush on Luke's cheek as he smiled. His dimples popped out and Michael wanted to feel the curve in his skin. 

"You really do Luke. I have a lot to tell you, please don't leave. I really want to tell you."

Luke's lips pursued in confusion, "I won't leave Michael."

Michael cracked a small smile, "I really hope so."

"What did you want to tell me?" He asked and Michael took a breath. 

He looked down clenching his eyes tight as he gathered his courage and then Michael felt Luke squeeze his hand ever so softly and he just wanted to hug Luke tightly and kiss him everywhere. Michael never wanted to let Luke go. 

"I like you Luke, a lot. An insane amount that I've never felt for anyone before." Michael admitted. "I've never felt this way ever and it's all because of you. And I don't know what to do. You make me so happy and I feel like I'm complete with you."

Luke sat there stunned as he took in Michael's words, his grip on Michael loosened but it was still there and Michael held on to Luke tightly not wanting him to let go. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Michael let out, "I've really got to say this and I'm not finished and I don't want you to cry. Don't cry Luke, I don't want you to cry."

Luke sat quietly not knowing what to say or do, he was so confused. 

"Luke you've shown me so many things and taught me to see the good in a situation. You've walked in and flipped my whole life around. I see colour now, I like it better. I don't want you to go. I think I.."

Michael shook his head not wanting to stop now.

"I think I might love you, or am getting there. Luke you've made me such a different person already. I do love you Luke. You're so perfect. When you smile I smile and when you laugh, I never want you to stop. I don't know everything about you but I've fallen in love with what I do know and I don't think I can ever fall out of love with you."

Michael's eyes were trained on their disconnected hands. Luke had pulled away, breaking the connection and Michael's heart. The green eyed boy didn't want to look up, he didn't want to see the damage he had caused.

But then he heard small sniffs and was forced to look up out of curiosity, "Luke?"

The blond had tears sliding down his pink cheeks- that worried Michael.

"Angel? What's wrong?" He asked and held Luke's face in his hands. His fingers wiped the tears off his cheeks and Luke's lashes fluttered down, only releasing more. He weakly shook his head but Michael didn't want him to stay quiet.

"Please talk to me." Michael pleaded whilst stroking the younger boys cheek. The small gesture made Luke even more weak and he reached up to move Michael's hands but couldn't and ended up leaving his shaky hands on top of Michael's. 

"Y-you can't love me Michael." He stuttered.

"I already do, there's no stopping me now." The green eyed boy said sadly- like he regretted falling in love with the angel. 

"Well stop. Love someone else."

Michael chuckled and slowly raised Luke's face up to look into his eyes. "I can't lose my feelings for you."

"Well you can't keep them either." The blond boy mumbled back.

"Why can't I?" 

"Because I'm not worth loving Mikey."

Michael refused to believe that because Luke was the most kindest, purest person he had ever met. He was so shy and innocent and beautiful and had Michael wrapped around his finger without trying. He was so effortlessly adorable Michael hated himself for falling in so deep.

"But you are, angel."

"I'm not an angel." He whispered and Michael tugged at his own hair in frustration. He just wanted to make the boy see sense.

"Luke, in this mess of a world, you're the only light there is. You're the only clear thing I see and want. You keep me grounded but also make me feel like I'm on cloud nine, ever since I laid my eyes on you I've been drifting in the air. I can't think straight."

Michael admired the blush on Luke's cheeks, he was so flustered by his words. The older boy held Luke's face in his hands, carefully making sure he was looking into Luke's ocean eyes.

"I've never fallen so deep for someone Luke. I hope you understand that, you're a brilliant person and I want to love you."

Their noses were nearly touching; Michael could see the specks of blue in his eyes. So pretty and shiny, he wanted to paint them and spend the rest of his days admiring the endless amount of waves and summer skies in them. 

"I really want to kiss you Luke." Michael took his chances and leaned in closer, "Right now, right here."


	51. Worry and Reassurance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m going to publish more of my stories on here from wattpad so if you’re a fan of my writing, you should go and check them out once this book is complete! Or you could just read them from my wattpad account.

Luke had fallen asleep in the car ride home giving Michael a lot of time to think. He was determined to make Luke believe that he deserved to be loved. And that he wasn't a bad person. He just had to figure out how and be able to do it, whilst ignoring his broken heart. 

Michael lifted Luke up in his arms and the two entered the warm home. He trecked upstairs and placed Luke's small body on the bed. He was gaining some weight and his skin was more bright making Michael smile at his progress. He was so proud of the younger boy. 

"Luke?" He called quietly. The boy needed to get dressed. 

"Luke wake up for me, you need to get dressed first."

It took a few more minutes until he started to stir and once he did, Michael walked to his cupboard pulling out a hoodie and some sweatpants. The blond took the clothes off him thankfully and blushed as he waited for Michael to turn around.

The two were ready for bed and Michael slipped into the left side, keeping a distance from Luke like he normally did.

"Mikey?" He whispered, "I want to see him tomorrow."

Michael's heart stopped for a second and suddenly felt sick as he asked, to make sure he was hearing this right, "What?"

"Alex." Luke breathed, "I want to talk to him."

"Tomorrow?" Michael gulped and Luke nodded. 

"Are you sure?"

Luke hummed quietly and Michael wished that he had forgotten the evil man.

***

The two boys were outside the station, Luke's body trembling but he refused to back away no matter how many times Michael encouraged him to. The older had reached out to hold Luke's hands and together they walked into the station, fingers intertwined.

It took some time but now they were just waiting to be called to see him. Luke's heart was going crazy, his anxiety had skyrocketed and Michael only realised when Luke's hold on his hands was too tight. 

"We can go if you want angel, we don't have to be here."

Luke gulped heavily and turned to face Michael, he wrapped his arms around the blue haired boy and hid his face in his neck. "Mikey I'm so scared. I can't do this but I really want to. I need to."

Michael rubbed Luke's back reassuringly, telling him it'd be okay. And when the officer came to lead Luke away; his eyes widened in fear and his breaths quickened. 

"I'll be there with you Luke. You're not by yourself."

Michael turned to face the police woman, "Can he have a security officer in there as well? The bastard shouldn't be able to touch him."

"There will be no contact between the two, I assure you Mr Clifford."

Michael only grimly nodded as he took Luke's hand and walked towards the room. 

***

Luke regretted coming, he just wanted to go back home with Michael. He didn't know how Alex would react or how he would react to Alex. He hadn't seen the man in so long, there were so many unspoken words between the two and so many problems that weren't sorted. He had hurt Luke so many times: he deserved to be punished. Luke was scared that Michael might find out things he didn't want him to hear so just as they reached the door- he stopped in his tracks, looking at the ground.

"I want to be alone." Luke mumbled quietly, catching Michael's attention.

"What?" Michael asked in shock. Both boys knew he had heard. 

"Are you sure?" The woman spoke and Luke nodded timidly not looking up at Michael. 

"Luke are you crazy? He could hurt you! I need to be in there with you, what if he does something? You're not going alone. I'm coming too."

Luke wanted Michael to be there too. But he was embarrassed. He didn't want Alex to tell Michael anything he didn't know, Luke was just too scared. Scared of Alex, scared of his past and scared of rejection. 

"I'm sorry Sir but that is not your decision. If Mr Hemmings wants to meet the prisoner by himself then he is allowed to do so. You must stay outside." 

"No. I'm coming in." Michael said sternly and Luke cringed. He knew that Michael had a temper, Michael had never used it on him. He only knew from what Calum had said and he could see it for himself. Michael was a tough, scary person if you didn't know him. But Luke did know him, and he knew that Michael was just being protective. He was scared too. But Michael's fear wasn't like Luke's, it didn't make him want to hide, it made him aggressive and hot headed. 

"Sir, you will have to remain outside." The woman spoke with a harsher tone and Michael was getting more angry.

"No I fucking won't. I'm not the one that hurt Luke, I should be able to be there. I don't give a fuck if there's a guard in there or not, the cops did nothing when he was beaten at home. So fuck off with your bullshit!"

Luke didn't like hearing Michael's rage so he looked up and saw the dark green forest of his eyes. There was a flame that was growing bigger and Luke needed to calm him down. 

"Mr Clifford, I do not appreciate the use of vulgar language. Step back before I have to get you taken out by my officers."

Michael growled in fury making Luke jump, "No! Don't do that! Give us a minute, please."

Luke pulled Michael away carefully and looked down at their connected hands. 

"Please calm down, I didn't mean to make you angry." He said quietly. 

Michael let out a sigh and asked for Luke to look up so he did. The cool blue in Luke’s eyes was all that was needed to dull the flame and Michael only nodded. 

"It wasn't you angel, it was that woman. She just- I don't know Luke, are you sure? I don't want you to get hurt."

Luke nodded telling Michael that he'd be okay, even though he knew he wouldn't be. He just wanted to protect himself from getting hurt even more.

Because in Luke's mind, once Michael found out everything, he'd hate Luke. And Luke couldn't deal with another broken heart caused by the first caring person in his life.


	52. The Meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You’ll like the next chapter :)

"You took your time, didn't you?"

His amused voice made Luke's body freeze, the younger boy clenched his eyes shut collecting himself before pulling out the chair and sitting down. 

He knew that there was a guard next to him and one with the man but he still felt so exposed and so scared. The man in front of him was still capable of hurting him like he had been doing for years and Luke just wanted to be in Michael's arms, listening to his kind words that always made him feel happy and warm inside. 

"Look at me Luke."

Luke flinched at his tone of voice and use of words. He knew he didn't have to but some part of him still felt obliged to listen and so he raised his head to see the man for the first time in ages. 

He had lost some weight and his skin was dull. His hair had grown out and his eyes were dark; but he was still the remnants of a monster from Luke’s past.

Luke's heart ached at the sight, he didn't know how he felt. He had spent so many years loving Alex or believing he did and know he was so torn. He couldn't stop the tears in his eyes. 

"Where were you all this time? You love me, so why don't you tell them the truth? I never hurt you, I loved you. I love you, Luke."

The older man leaned forward, trying to hold Luke's hands but he was pulled back by the officer. He had cuffs restricting his hands and they were beginning to annoy him, Luke could tell. 

His tears escaped after what Alex had said because he knew what they had wasn't love. It was toxic. You don't hurt the people you love, you fight for them and love them. Luke had been in a bubble this whole time, he had been trapped away living a facade and now he was exposed to the truth. All those times Ashton had told him that Alex never loved him made sense now. 

Which lover went out in the night and returned with the smell and stains of a stranger's love?

"You don't love me Alex. You used to, but you forgot what it is." Luke whispered. "You hurt me. All those days, all those years, you kept me trapped and locked away. You didn't love me, you just didn't want to let me go."

"No, that's not what it was baby. We love each other, tell them that I've done nothing wrong and let me go. We can go away for a bit, and spend some time together away from everyone. Especially that blue haired bitch, he's so jealous of us Luke."

Luke but his lip to stop them from quivering, "Michael's not a b-bitch. He's shown me so much that I never ever thought I'd see. You need to know that what we had wasn't love Alex. Please don't be mad at me. I loved you, I promise I did but somewhere along the way you stopped loving me. And you hurt me."

"Don't be so fucking stupid, I never hurt you Luke. Stop lying. I just punished you, everyone deserves to be punished when they've done something wrong."

"But I-I did nothing wrong. I really tried Alex but you didn't even care for me." Luke cried and Alex tried to reach for him again but the cuffs restrained him. He let out an aggravated groan.

"I do care for you baby. Have you forgotten every-"

"Shut up!" Luke exclaimed, "Stop saying you love me and you care! Look at me! I'm pale and skinny, I hardly eat and I was covered in bruises half the time! You kicked me out the house in the rain for days because you were with another guy. You beat me for stupid reasons. All those times you made me make love to you when I didn't want to. If you loved me you would've noticed that I didn't want any of it, I didn't enjoy nothing Alex. I just wanted to die!"

Luke was a sobbing mess and Alex watched him, face revealing his shock and then pure anger flooded his face.

"You little bitch! I spent time on you, giving you everything you wanted. I did everything for you! You deserved everything, all the punches and bruises, you deserved more. Don't think I didn't notice, I loved seeing you underneath me while we had sex. On those days you pissed me off so much, I wanted to see you hurt. Sure we had our good days but I still stayed because I loved you."

Luke was crying so much that he couldn't stay there anymore. He stood up and rushed to the door, the officer looking at him in pity and sadness but Luke didn't want their emotions. He wanted one particular thing and when he saw it, he jumped up holding them close. His body was a shaky mess but he felt put together and controlled in Michael's arms. The blue haired boy kissed his forehead numerous times asking him what had happened but Luke just shook his head still crying. As soon as the officers stepped out of the room, Michael walked up to them insisting on knowing what had happened in their but he wasn't given any information. 

"Angel it's okay. You'll be okay."

"Mikey, please take me home. I-I don't wanna be here."

Michael nodded and kissed Luke’s forehead yet again, wiping his tears and brushing his hair back before leaving the station. 

Michael got into the car with Luke's legs around his waist and arms around his neck. He still hadn't calmed down so Michael wanted to wait for him to stop crying. 

The green eyed boy kept rubbing Luke's back and placing kisses on his temple and forehead telling him that it'd be okay. It was quiet in the car except for the occasional sniffs from Luke. The two boys stayed in the car for a bit longer just savouring the silence and comfort they gave one another.


	53. Street Lamps and Real ‘First’ Kisses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any directioners here? How are you feeling about the whole 10 year anniversary? Because I’m not doing okay. Anyway, on with the chapter ;) The chapter name should have given it away.

It was now dark out as Luke and Michael walked through the park. The dim streetlights lit up the path ahead of them and Luke couldn’t seem to take his mind off of earlier events.

Michael had been talking to the blond like he was fragile and Luke knew that Michael only had Luke's best intentions at heart. The yellow lights of the street lamps made Michael's hair appear a dull green, near turquoise colour than its usual blue. His eyes were still a stunning green and his lips looked more pink under the light. He looked gorgeous and Luke stopped abruptly making Michael stop too. 

"What's wrong Luke?" He asked and Luke felt very nervous. 

"There's something I've got to tell you." He admitted. Michael nodded slowly.

"You don't have to rush anything."

The blond took a huge breath before he spoke. "You already know that Alex used to- he wasn't a good boyfriend. He used to h-hurt me, well I umm..." Luke trailed off in fear and Michael could tell that whatever it was, Luke had mustered up a lot of courage so it had affected him a lot. 

"Take your time angel." Michael whispered, watching how Luke visibly softened. The nickname and soft tone of voice comforted him slightly and Michael wanted to make this as easy as possible for the boy. 

The next time Michael looked up, Luke had tears in his sapphire coloured eyes and that made Michael sad. 

"I admire you so much Luke. You're the strongest person I know."

Luke nodded, not really caring for the words, he was just so, so scared to tell Michael. He didn't want to be seen differently, he feared judgement so much. He hadn't even told his own best friend. 

"You wouldn't want me anymore." Luke trembled, "You'll hate me like I hate myself. But please don't. I don't want you to stop being in my life."

"I would never." Michael promised. 

"I-I wasn't just hurt by Alex, Michael." The tears never stoped falling as he spoke, his lips were quivering and his body was trembling and the boy gripped onto the pole of the streetlamp tightly. "Alex, he..he r-raped me. A lot."

Michael's eyes widened in disbelief. 

"H-he w-what?" The green eyed boy stammered, looking at Luke in absolute shock. The younger hid his face away from the world, his small body shaking. 

His sobs were loud and heartbreaking and he looked so little. Michael still couldn't apprehend what Luke had told him and now he stared at the boy in shock, not knowing what to do. The night they spent a few days ago, talking about the nightmare Luke had with the hands touching him, it wasn't just the stranger in the park. It was Alex: his ex-boyfriend.

This beautiful, sweet boy that smiled at sunflowers and cried so beautifully, who giggled so sweetly and had the prettiest shade of blue for his eyes had been treated so vile by someone he loved?

"D-does anyone know?" Michael asked, stuttering on his words.

Luke's head snapped up, "N-no! They'll hate m-me."

The older boy sighed in frustration. “Luke, I don't hate you. You know what? This makes me so proud of you. You're so fucking brave angel, you're still the same caring person. You haven't given up on yourself or the world and that makes you the most bravest person. Don't hate yourself, please, because you're so beautiful, and fuck I want to show you how beautiful you are."

"Y-you still love me?"

"Of course I do angel."

"W-will Ashton still love me? And Calum?" Luke stuttered and Michael nodded. "They won't ever stop loving you Luke, no one will."

Luke looked down in thought and he was only brought out of it when he felt Michael's hands on his cheeks making him look up at him.

"Don't ever doubt your beauty Luke." He whispered, "You're the most important person in my life."

Michael's fingers were softly caressing Luke's cheeks. He looked into the broken, blue crystals of Luke's eyes and decided that he wanted to be the one to fix them. 

Michael had been so understanding. His broken pieces matched Luke's, they were helping each other heal. The green in his eyes was the grass and trees to Luke's oceans, they grounded each other and helped one another grow. Luke knew that now.

The scary looking, punk boy who he had been so fascinated with since the beginning was the one that showed him really what love could be like and he wanted it more than ever. And Luke was obsessed with his bright blue hair and smile that made him seem so soft and cuddly like a kitten.

Under the lights, Luke got on his tiptoes, hair falling freely making him push it back, his eyes were shining brightly.

Michael was so in love he felt a tug on his heart as he leaned in. Their noses were grazing softly against each other and Luke was hesitant. He looked down closing his eyes giving himself some time. And Michael understood right away, his hands held Luke's face delicately as he waited for him to decide.

"We can wait." He mumbled, caressing Luke's cheeks. 

The blond whispered looking up at Michael, "I know, but I don't want to."

Leaning forward, Luke connected their lips together.

***

Michael couldn't believe it when Luke said those words. He had been waiting so long for this moment and he wouldn't mind waiting a lifetime because Luke was so fucking special. Michael would do anything for the boy. 

The younger’s lips were soft against his own, just like Michael remembered them to be. The kiss was breathtaking and sweet and Michael knew he would want to spend the rest of his life kissing these pair of lips. 

He stepped closer, pulling the boy towards him and sighed. Luke curled into Michael’s touch straight away, hands resting on his chest as his skinny fingers held onto the dark material of Michael’s t-shirt. This was better than anything Michael had imagined and he never wanted it to end. 

But it had to and Luke pulled away breathlessly, resting his head against Michael's. His eyes were closed as he recovered from the kiss and when he opened them again he was met with Michael's intense gaze. A pink blush coated his cheek making the older smile widely.

"You make me so goddamn happy angel." He breathed out making Luke smile shyly. 

"You make me really happy too.”


	54. Songwriting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was really tired whilst editing, please excuse the mistakes :)

Luke had been staring at the guitar across the room for the past twenty minutes. Michael had insisted to keep it on display since it was a beautiful instrument and so Luke could play it whenever he wanted. Michael was upstairs leaving Luke all alone in the front room. 

He desperately wanted to play his instrument and possibly write a new song. Luke had a lot of inspiration right now and there was nothing better to do. It was raining outside and cold. But Luke was too scared to play.

Standing up, he brushed the dust off his legs and went upstairs to look for the blue haired boy.

"Michael?" 

It took a few seconds but then he heard Michael call out his name and soon Luke found him in his room. He was sat in front of his desk with pencils surrounding him. The blond leaned against the doorframe and smiled, "What are you drawing?"

Michael shrugged helplessly, "I don't know, I'm still thinking."

Luke nodded and Michael decided to ask him why he was calling, "Did you need anything?"

Luke nodded shyly and Michael smiled, "What's wrong?"

"C-Can Ashton come o-over?"

Michael smiled widely, nodding, "Of course he can, you don't have to ask. Do you wanna give him a call or should I?"

"I'll do it."

***

Luke had placed the guitar on his lap nervously looking around and waiting for the sound of the doorbell. It wasn't too long until the sound filled the air and Luke had a huge grin as he opened the door. 

"Ash!" He excitedly called and hugged his best friend tightly, sighing in his arms. "I love you Ash." Luke mumbled making the older boy laugh and kiss his head. "Me too buddy."

He led the golden haired boy into the room and his hazel eyes instantly lit up at the sight of Luke's guitar. "What are you working on?"

"Nothing." Luke frowned, "Too scared, I wanted you here."

Ashton smiled warmly at the boy and sat himself down on the ground in front of him, "Well let's get to work."

Luke nodded,smiling slightly.

"I have a sort of idea what I want to write." Ashton nodded along. "It's a sad song about two people. Things didn't work out." Luke said sadly.

"Got any lyrics?" Ashton asked quietly and Luke shook his head.

"I just-" Luke let out a sigh, "Really want to write something down."

Ashton reached over for Luke's guitar and started strumming random chords. The younger closed his eyes and leaned back against the couch as he thought. 

Ashton always played random melodies when Luke was a bit stuck, it helped him think and he loved Ashton for it. 

His finger gripped the pen and his old song book and Luke wrote down the first few lyrics, he didn't need to think hard on how he felt or what to write. Everything was still raw to him.

"Can I have a look?" Ashton asked putting the guitar down and Luke nodded hesitantly, handing the book. 

He held his guitar and started playing some notes watching Ashton as he read his words. 

"They're great Luke. Really good, this song will be beautiful, I can tell." Ashton reached over patting his knee and Luke bit his lip. 

"I showed Michael a song." He said quietly, "I played it for him because he asked me to."

Ashton looked at his best friend in surprise but he was so proud of Luke. 

"What did he say?"

"He really liked it."

"Is that all?" Ashton asked expecting a bigger reaction from Michael, the punk boy did have a huge crush on his best friend after all.

"He um... he kissed me." Luke whispered looking down at his hands. 

"He what?!" Ashton exclaimed, causing Luke's cheeks to go crimson. 

Ashton had missed out on a lot of what happened in Luke's life and now he felt bad since he hadn't been spending time with Luke. For the next 20 minutes or so, the younger told him everything that had happened except for the kiss they shared last night. Luke wanted to keep that to himself for now, it was too special. 

"He likes you a lot." Ashton mumbled and Luke blushed. "I- I think I might too."

Ashton's eyes nearly fell out, "Luke that's great!"

"No it isn't." Luke said sadly, "He can't like me."

"Why is that?" Ashton frowned, shuffling closer to his friend. "You're absolutely perfect. You're talented, cute, insanely hot with that lip ring." He chuckled flicking the metal on his lips. "Don't hold yourself back Lu, I doubt there's anything that will change his mind on you."

Luke sat quietly tugging on his lip ring for a minute and then he looked back down at the guitar in his hand. "Can we carry on?"

"Sure."

Luke made a beat on his guitar that the two were satisfied with and Ashton hummed along singing the lyrics they had written so far under his breath. 

"This is great Lu."

Luke blushed and nodded, "I really like it."

Then Michael unexpectedly walked in smiling at the scene. 

"Are you guys writing a song?" He asked.

"Yep." Ashton said whilst Luke nodded.

"I'd love to hear it." He said smiling sweetly at Luke and Ashton smirked.

"I'm sure you would."

Luke blushed and swatted Ashton causing him to laugh and Michael looked at the two in confusion but then fondly at Luke when he saw the pink blush coat his cheeks. 

"Have you finished your drawing?" Luke asked curiously and Michael shook his head frowning. 

"Couldn't work on it. I'm going out to get some stuff, see you in a bit yeah?" He said smiling and Luke nodded smiling back, "Bye."

Michael waved to the two and glanced one last time at Luke before walking out the room. He heard the soft guitar strums and the two boys mumbling over lyrics and he smiled to himself. 

"What was that for?" Luke frowned and Ashton only chuckled. "I couldn't help it, he's so in love with you Lu.”


	55. Record Stores and Kisses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this chapter so much!

Michael smiled as he walked into the shop, Luke would love this. He picked up a few records, even some that he wasn't sure that Luke liked before walking to the counter .

It wasn't about having no inspiration for his painting, it was Luke. He had been in Michael's mind all night and day and he just wasn't leaving. His blue eyes never left Michael's memory and their kiss had been replayed more than a million times. God, it was better than anything Michael had ever felt or imagined and he wanted to do it again and so much more. 

The blue haired boy got into his car excited to give his gift to Luke and as soon as he reached his house, he jogged towards the door and unlocked it before being stopped by a beautiful sound. 

He threw his cap on the table and walked towards the room listening in a trance. The soft voice filled the house, with the occasional light clicks or bangs and Michael was taken away. 

He looked inside to see the boy he had grown to love on the floor, guitar in hand as he sang. He was peering down at the book beside him as he played the same rhythm and Ashton was smiling as he clicked his fingers along. 

"I think this would sound better on piano." Luke's voice piped up and Ashton nodded. 

"Umm hi?"

Luke's head snapped back to look at Michael in shock whereas Ashton had a huge grin on his face. 

"Hi Michael!" He welcomed and Luke mumbled a hi as well and put his guitar down, hugging his legs. 

Michael noticed the change in his mood and he saddened slightly. 

"Was I interrupting something? Do you want me to leave?" He said even though he didn't want to go.

"No you're alright." Ashton said beckoning him over and Luke nodded his head at Ashton's words despite feeling shy. 

"What's in the bag?" Ashton asked curiously and Michael looked down, remembering why he was here.

"Well um, it's for Luke." He rambled and Luke looking at him in surprise and curiosity.

Ashton sat up excited as he waited for the bag to be handed to Luke. 

"You told me that your vinyls were.. destroyed. I wanted to get you some new ones, and a player. I'm not sure if you'll like all the albums though, I put some new stuff in there that I like. Maybe you'll like them too?" 

Luke looked inside the bag in absolute shock and Ashton had a huge smile on his lips as he watched his best friend. Luke loved his old vinyls, the two had spent hours together sitting in silence and listening to the songs. Only talking when they had something important on their minds.

"They're great!" Ashton said picking out a Green Day album. Luke was still in shock and he only snapped out of his daze when Michael crouched down beside him. 

"What do you think? Should I return them? Do you not like them?" He frowned and Luke shook his head.

"N-No, I love them. Thank you Michael."

It took him a few seconds but soon he moved all the albums and the player onto the ground beside him and wrapped his arms around Michael's neck knowing that Ashton would talk about this later. 

Michael wrapped his arms tightly around Luke straight away and smiled making Ashton giddy with happiness and excitement for his best friend. 

Once Luke pulled away Ashton coughed gaining Michael's attention. "Me and Luke have been working on a song. Mostly Luke's work but I added a few touches. Do you wanna hear it?"

"No." Luke said quickly, worrying about what Michael would say.

The smile on Michael's face disappeared and even Ashton frowned, "Why? It's awesome. And it was like one of the quickest songs we've ever wrote."

Luke just shrugged, he didn't want to tell Michael that he was embarrassed or that he still thought about Alex.

Michael senses the tension in the room so he stood up and rubbed his hands on his jeans, putting on a smile. "Should I order a pizza?"

"Sure!" Ashton smiled and then nudged Luke. "We haven't had pizza in ages."

The two older boys kept the smiles on their face as they spoke so Luke wouldn't feel uncomfortable.

***

Michael, Luke and Ashton were all on the couch. Luke in between the two, they were watching a comedy that Ashton had picked out. He was the only one laughing. Luke chuckled once in a while but Michael wasn't paying attention at all.

Ashton's phone pinged and he stood up with a smile, "As much as I'd like to stay, Calum just came back and I miss him."

Luke giggled and Michael smiled when hearing that, "Bye Ash." Luke said and Ashton leaned down for a quick hug. Michael stood up hugging the boy too and telling him to let Calum know he missed his ugly ass. 

Once Ashton had left and Michael had locked the door, he walked into the room to see Luke staring at him. 

"I'm sorry I didn't show you the song." He spoke, "I can show you now if you want. I was just embarrassed." 

"Why were you embarrassed?"

Luke shrugged not knowing what to say.

"I'd still love to hear it."

"Can we go upstairs?" Luke asked. 

"Yeah of course."

The two boys turned the TV off before Luke grabbed his guitar and walked upstairs, Michael following from behind. 

Luke gulped as he sat on the bed with Michael on the other side. He opened up his song book to the page and started to sweat nervously. 

"I've heard you sing before Luke, it's okay."

Luke nodded taking a huge breath before singing:

I saw you looking brand new overnight  
And I caught you looking too but you didn't look twice,  
You look happy, you look happy..

***

"Wow." Michael breathed out staring at the blond, "You wrote this?"

Luke spoke quietly, "Yeah, Ash helped. It's about a broken couple." He thought back to Alex, all the times he had been cheated on with much prettier boys or girls and he sighed, "I think it's one of my favourites."

"You could be a singer." Michael said and Luke blushed at his praise.

Michael reached over to push Luke's hair behind his ear, "You're really talented angel."

As soon as Luke put his guitar down, Michael leaned over and kissed him. It was unexpected for Luke and he looked at Michael in surprise before shyly kissing him back. The green eyed boy pulled the boy closer onto his lap caressing his cheeks. He stopped kissing Luke for a minute and looked him in the eye, giving him a reassuring smile. “Is this okay? Can I kiss you, or do you not want me to? I don’t mind Luke.” 

His one hand was pressed against Luke’s cheek, the other placed on his waist and Luke felt the butterflies in his stomach come to life.

“This is okay.” The blonde whispered, “You can kiss me.”

Michael smiled widely and leaned forward, their noses grazed against each other and both boys had small smiles on their lips. Michael’s eyes shined as he looked at Luke, the younger was blushing fiercely and he couldn’t seem to take Michael’s stares anymore because he leaned in connecting their lips again.

His hands trailed down Luke's long arms, reaching his fingertips and bringing them around his neck before placing his own hands around Luke's hips.

Michael wanted Luke to be comfortable around him. It took a few kisses and whispers until his fingers curled into Michael's hair, gripping softly as he kissed back. The feeling of their lips together was still so foreign to Michael, he could live off this buzz forever. 

"You sounded so beautiful." Michael whispered in between kisses and then he admired the blush on Luke's cheeks. He placed kisses on both cheeks and then his lips before kissing his jaw. 

Luke had never spent so much time just kissing, Alex always rushed into things like this but now it was nice and slow and Luke really did feel loved. He enjoyed the sensation of Michael's lips peppering kisses on his jaw but he wasn't ready for the lingering kisses on his neck and he let out a little whimper. 

The little sound sparked something inside Michael and he pulled back looking at Luke. His blue eyes were bright and his lips were red and swollen. His head tilted to the side and his breathing fast.

Michael loved this side of Luke. 

He leaned back down kissing and nibbling Luke's pale skin loving the little sounds that escaped his lips and when Michael finally decided to leave his mark on Luke's soft skin he heard the angel moan quietly and Michael knew he was going to need to stop himself from taking this any further.

"Mikey." Luke breathed out, fingers tugging slightly on his blue hair and Michael groaned, "What is it angel?"

"W-We should g-go to bed." He stuttered feeling very overwhelmed.

The blue haired boy hummed not paying much attention, he was too busy admiring the little bruise on Luke's neck. He kissed it softly, biting his lips hard to stop himself now from smiling when he heard Luke gasp. 

"Mikey, come on." Luke insisted and reluctantly, Michael pulled away.

The two got ready for bed, Michael making sure to give Luke a shirt that didn't hide the purple mark on his neck. 

Luke's cheeks were on fire the whole time making Michael chuckle at his shyness. As they slipped into bed, Michael pulled Luke closer wrapping his arms around him and pecking his temple. 

"Angel?"

"Yeah."

"Can I take you out tomorrow? As in a date?"

Luke smiled widely to himself, "Okay."

"Really?"

"Yeah." He whispered wanting to close his eyes and stop blushing. "Night Mikey."

Luke could hear the smile on Michael's face as he whispered, "Night Angel."


	56. The Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would you guys read my other stories?

Michael woke up with a smile, he was going on a date with Luke. The most beautiful boy he had ever laid his eyes on. 

The green eyed boy sat up, running a hand through his blue hair groaning. It was still early and he never woke up early but today was different. Quickly, he reached for his phone sending messages to his two friends and then put his phone away. He turned to Luke and smiled when seeing him huddled under the duvet. 

Michael stroked Luke's hair leaning down to kiss his cheek softly. "Angel? Angel wake up."

Luke leaned into Michael's touch mumbling sleepily- making Michael's heart race. His blond hair was sprawled all over the pillow and his lips were a gorgeous pink compared to his pale skin; his lashes were long and rested on his cheeks; Michael was mesmerised. 

"Angel wake up." He tried again and this time Luke woke up, revealing the blue eyes Michael loved. He rubbed his eyes sleepily, pushing the blanket off himself. Luke looked at Michael for a few seconds before smiling lazily. "Hi Mikey."

Luke's voice was deeper then his usual voice and Michael found it really hot. "Morning sleepyhead."

Luke groaned closing his eyes again and Michael tried hard to control himself as the boy lay out in front of him. His eyes caught on the mark he had left on Luke's skin last night and he smiled mischievously. 

He crawled over towards Luke and placed his hands on either side of his body trapping him. Luke sensed the sudden movement and opened his eyes, staring at Michael. A blush coated his cheeks and he bit his lip nervously. 

"Don't do that." Michael groaned.

Luke giggled nervously, "What?"

Michael tugged on Luke's lip lightly, "Bite your lip, you look hot when you do that."

Luke looked away blushing until he felt Michael's fingers tracing his neck. 

"So pretty." He hummed. 

"What is?" Luke asked confused and Michael smirked, "The hickey I left on you."

Luke turned a deep red only making Michael more cocky, "Maybe I should leave some more."

Michael leant down, his tongue ghosting over Luke's skin and the younger boy closed his eyes. "Michael we just woke up." He whispered and Michael chuckled. "I know but you're just so pretty." He looked up, placing another kiss on Luke's cheek before getting off. 

"We've got a busy day." Michael said grinning. "I invited Ashton to hang out with you today. I've got some preparing to do for our date."

Luke couldn't stop the smile from surfacing and he looked at Michael happily, "Thank you Michael. It means a lot to me, no one's really taken me on a date before." He mumbled, "Alex and I went out but we never went for dates."

"It's my pleasure Luke, I'm a lucky guy. I never would've thought I'd be taking someone like you for a date. Don't be sad, today's gonna be a good day." Michael said smiling hugging Luke softly. Luke returned the hug back before the two boys got ready for the day ahead.

***

Michael and Calum had spent all morning and afternoon getting things perfect for Luke and now all the green eyed boy had to do was get ready and drive to Ashton's house. That's where Luke was right now, hopefully getting ready for their evening. 

Michael was buzzing with energy, Calum could tell as his best friend hummed happily to the radio as he drove. Michael hated radio music. 

"I'm really happy for you Michael, I just can't believe you and Luke are finally able to be together." Calum gushed and Michael nodded. 

"I'm so happy Calum, I really am. I've never been this happy, no ones ever made me feel so loved. Luke is really important to me." Michael looked down sighing and Calum noticed straight away. "What's wrong?"

"Well, it's our first date and I don't want to ruin anything now, or ever. He's the only one that matters to me, I think I might love him Cal. It's still early but I really think I love him and I'm scared I'll ruin what we have. I always mess things up."

Calum frowned at his best friend, "Don't say that Michael! You and Luke are perfect for each other, even Ashton's happy for you both. You know how protective he is over Luke, how protective we all are. You would never hurt him, we know that. You should know that too. Don't be scared, this'll be the best night ever!"

Michael nodded, reassured by his best friends words. "Thanks Cal, it means a lot." He said reaching for Calum and giving his hand a squeeze. 

Calum smiled happily, he was so proud of Michael.

***

Michael double checked that everything was perfect before he ran up the stairs to get dressed. He had half an hour to get ready before he had to drive to Ashton's. He jumped under the hot water of the shower before wrapping a towel around his waist and stepping out. Michael rummaged through his cupboards pulling out black skinny jeans and a black band tee. He really hoped Ashton didn't forget to tell Luke to dress comfortably because this date was a bit different than the usual fancy dinner. Michael really hoped Luke liked it.

He slipped into his favourite pair of shoes and fixed his hair smiling at the result. Michael quickly brushed his teeth and spritzed some cologne before grabbing the bouquet of flowers and his keys. He decided to hold his denim jacket in his hands instead of wearing it for now.

The drive there wasn't necessarily long but Michael's nerves were all over the place and he just really wanted to see Luke. The blond boy would calm him down and Michael missed his presence. 

He kept checking himself in the mirror worrying that he didn't look nice. He suddenly regretted everything he chose for the date because maybe Luke would've expected more? Maybe he would rather the fancy dinner and movie? 

Michael pulled up into the driveway, palms sweaty as hesitation filled him. Fuck, he thought, here goes nothing. 

And with that, he got out of his car checking his breath before leaning over to grab the flowers he had bought for the boy. His eyes widened as he saw that a few had been squashed because he threw his jacket over it.

Shit.

Michael contemplated if he should bring the flowers or leave them and he wanted to tear his hair out because he was so worried.

But then he heard a door open and sweet voice call for him and he had to look up.


	57. Soft Touches and White Roses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A longer chapter for you all with slight smut :)

Michael stared at Luke. He looked stunning. Luke had left his hair how Michael liked it, wild and curly and his eyes were bright. His skin had a glow to it and he bit his lips nervously; tugging at the black ring. Michael noticed that the boy was wearing chapstick since his lips looked shiny, it looked great on him. Luke looked nervous as he stood there, hands behind his back. 

Michael took him all in, he had on black shoes with ripped, black, skinny jeans. A khaki t-shirt on that fit him well and a small necklace around his neck. Michael broke out into a grin forgetting all his recent troubles and walked up to the boy, hiding the flowers. 

"Hi Angel." He welcomed as he bent down hugging him and Michael would be lying if he said he wasn't surprised when Luke hugged him back tightly. "I missed you." The boy whispered making Michael's heart race, "Me too baby."

The name had slipped out of adoration for Luke and Michael tensed, worried that the boy would feel uncomfortable but he was okay. "These are for you." He said handing the small bouquet of white roses and Luke looked at them stunned. 

"Really?" He asked shocked and Michael nodded. Luke took them from him, admiring the pretty flowers. "A few of them got ruined in the car.. I ugh forgot I had them and they got squashed. I'm sorry."

"They're beautiful." Luke breathed out looking at the older boy fondly, "Thank you so much Mikey."

The pair got into the car, sitting in silence but it wasn't awkward. Luke had the flowers on his lap, occasionally glancing down at them and smiling and Michael would smile to himself each time Luke did. 

Shyly, Michael reached over, fingers skimming Luke's knuckles as if he was asking permission before he interlocked their fingers. Luke had a smile on his lips the whole time, as he looked out the window. And Michael? He was over the moon.

Michael's eyes were on the road but he was still too busy thinking about the boy beside him. He tried hard to focus on the road, wanting to keep his date safe. Luke's hands were much more smaller and warm in his and Michael loved it. His thumb was stroking Luke's nails and then he raised their joined hands, bringing them into the light. Luke's nails were coated in an electric red colour and when Michael looked over at Luke he saw the boy blushing.

"I think they're really pretty." Michael said quietly placing a soft kiss on Luke knuckles. "Maybe next time I can paint them for you, if you want?"

Luke nodded at his words, "Yes please." 

"Then I will."

"Can I paint yours for you?" Luke asked shyly, "Only if you don't mind. I like painting nails, I used to do my mums."

Michael had never had his nails painted before, he never was interested in it. He didn't have anything against it. When he saw it on girls he thought it looked pretty. He preferred it to the long, sharp fake ones he would see girls wear. Michael wasn't sure he wanted them to be painted but now that Luke had asked, he didn't mind. He'd paint his nails every day in every colour of the rainbow if Luke wanted him to. 

"Sure you can Luke. I can't wait."

As soon as they arrived, the butterflies were back in Michael's stomach and he forced the feeling to go away as he stepped out of the his car and into the cool night air. He took a breath and jogged to the other side of the car, wanting to open Luke's door for him. 

"Thank you Mikey." Luke said softly, his heart beating fast. Luke had never been treated so lovingly before, he felt so special and wanted. He realised that there was so much good in the world that he had been missing out on. Being with Michael made everything so nice, Luke loved it. Being with the boy was his happy place, the only place on earth he wanted to be. 

Michael reached for Luke's hand and led him down a path. Luke followed quietly not wanting to disturb the peace until he gasped. There were pretty fairy lights on the trees that they walked by and he knew Michael was watching him. But he was too busy staring at the trees. Michael had let go of Luke's hand but the blue eyed boy hadn't noticed as he carried on taking small steps down the path.

As soon as he reached the last tree his eyes widened at the sight. There was a truck parked to the side with lanterns all around it. In front of Luke was a big flower field. 

There was a bed of yellow, white and pink flowers all swaying softly in the breeze. Luke could only see the flowers nearby, it was too dark to see far out but he knew it would be beautiful. He seemed to have forgotten Michael until he heard someone cough. 

Michael was walking towards the truck and that's when Luke saw the blankets and pillows sprawled out. There was a picnic basket in the middle with a white rose lying on top of it, like the ones Michael had given him earlier. 

Luke couldn't help but tear up and when Michael noticed, worry etched into his features. 

"What's wrong Angel?" He asked rushing to Luke's side and Luke wiped his tears, laughing to himself. "I'm not sad, I promise. I'm just really happy."

Michael blushed at that but laughed with Luke, "Thank god, I was scared you wouldn't like it."

"I love it." Luke said making Michael smile widely. Luke loved the way his eyes crinkled and how despite it being dark, he could still see his green eyes shine brightly.

"Thank you, Michael Clifford." He whispered before leaning in to kiss his cheek.

***

The pair had finished their picnic, having spent the time getting to know things that they didn't know about each other and laughing at jokes Michael shared. They hadn't felt so at peace in a long time and the green eyed boy was so happy he had asked Luke to go on a date with him.

Michael was lying back, leaning on the pillows with Luke sat in between his legs resting his head on Michael's chest. Luke was fumbling with the rose in his hands whilst Michael was singing a song quietly, fingers tracing random shapes on Luke's thigh.

"You have a good voice." Luke commented making Michael chuckle. "That reminds me, I tried to learn a song on the guitar. For you. But I just couldn't get the hang of it. I wanted to play it for you today while we were on our date."

"That's okay." Luke said sweetly, "I can still teach you if you want. This date was more than perfect. I feel like a princess." He whispered shyly turning back to look at Michael.

"I want to make you feel like a princess all the time." Michael told him softly. The younger boy looked down with a smile and soon felt hands hold his hips gently as he was placed on Michael's lap facing him. 

"Thank you, for making me feel like one." He said quietly, "Thank you for everything."

Luke distracted himself by tracing designs on Michael's shirt. He really wanted to kiss Michael and he didn't know if he should so he looked up wanting to ask him. 

"Mikey?" 

Michael hummed his response, green eyes studying the younger. 

"C-Can I.." Luke blushed as he thought about his next words. He let out a breath and looked back up into the bright green eyes of his date. Without a warning he leaned down and right before their lips touched he breathed out, "can I kiss you?"

Michael found himself suddenly staring into Luke’s eyes and he gulped hard. Too blown away for words, he nodded and soon the two boys were sharing their 'second' kiss. Michael could comprehend everything from the wind crackling in his ears, to the cramp in his leg and the lights hanging off the trees all around them but he couldn't comprehend the fact that he was the one kissing Luke Hemmings.

It seemed to good to be true.

Michael held Luke's face lovingly as he pulled the boy closer so that their chests were touching. The kiss was soft, their lips ghosting each other and Luke smiled. He pulled back slightly and looked into Michael's eyes. The blue haired boy had the biggest grin on his face as he leaned forward pecking Luke's lips one, two, three times.

Luke giggled and Michael could just hear that laugh forever. His hands brushed Luke's hips and he let out a breath, "You're amazing."

The blond blushed and Michael couldn't stop himself from kissing Luke again. His tongue ran over Luke's bottom lip asking for entrance and as soon he was allowed, he kissed the boy with more passion leaning back against the pillows behind him. Luke was still shy and hesitant but with Michael's loving strokes and tender whispers he felt at comfort and he found himself letting go. 

The kiss wasn't rushed, the pair took their time enjoying the feeling of pressing their lips against each others. Luke never wanted it to end but he found himself struggling for air so he placed his hands on Michael's chest steadying himself as he breathed heavily. Michael's eyes were wild and his lips plump and Luke blushed knowing that he was the cause and that he most likely looked the same. 

And he was right. Michael just couldn't take his eyes off the blond beauty on top of him. His lips were red and swollen, contrasting beautifully against his pale skin. His eyes held a glow to them and Michael wanted to be kissing the boy all the time if it meant seeing him in this state. The wind had messed with Luke's hair but the older boy loved it. Luke was a hot mess because of Michael and now with his small hands unintentionally rubbing all over Michael's chest, Michael couldn't stop the images in his mind. 

"What are you thinking about?" Luke's innocent voice asked, bringing his mind out the gutter.

"About how pretty you are." He hummed gripping onto both of Luke's thighs. The blond squirmed on top of him; Michael could feel the blood coarse through his body. He willed himself to calm down.

"I've got something for you back home." Michael said and Luke looked at him curiously. "What is it?"

"It's a surprise."

Luke huffed, "Please tell me."

Michael grinned at his childishness, "Nope, you'll find out when you get home."

Luke whined and shuffled on Michael's lap suddenly causing the older to clench his jaw with a low groan.

"What happened?" Luke asked confused and Michael sighed. "You-" He groaned, closing his eyes and taking in more breaths. 

The hold Michael had on Luke's hips tightened and the boy shuffled closer instinctively. From the grunt Michael released, Luke turned crimson as he realised. "I'm so sorry." He rushed out suddenly feeling Michael underneath him. 

Luke bit his lip at his own arousal, this kind of attraction from someone else was foreign and Luke couldn't stop himself from getting a teeny, tiny bit excited. 

But he was still the same anxious Luke so he tried to move but as soon as he was almost completely off him, Michael reached out holding Luke securely and pulling him back down onto him. "You're okay." The blue haired boy spoke, his words soft and kind. "You don't have to go."

Luke flushed furiously as he chewed on his lips, looking down at Michael. His green eyes were clenched shut and he was breathing heavily. Luke could feel the tingles in his lower stomach. 

He decided to take his chances as he leaned down, facing Michael and wrapping his arms around the older boys neck. He shyly moved nearer to Michael and the older boys eyes snapped open; revealing the green eyes Luke had been loving for a while.

The look they shared was heavy with tension and it took all of Luke's might to not look away. 

Michael noticed his slight discomfort and he reached out to stroke his cheeks, keeping his eyes firmly planted on Luke's own. "I'll look after you."

Luke couldn't wait anymore. He leaned forward, pressing his lips against Michael's once again before moving his body against him. 

The blond whimpered as Michael pulled him closer, his crotch coming in contact with Michael's slight bulge and he pulled away leaning his head against Michael's, breathing heavily. 

Michael watched him in awe, "You okay princess?"

The blond's cheeks turned a fiery red at the nickname, he liked it a lot and now he suddenly felt so embarrassed.

"Yeah." He answered shakily and Michael chuckled pressing small kisses on his neck.

Luke sighed out, slowly moving his hips to create the slight friction he craved and Michael's kisses only intensified. 

"God, Luke."

Michael groaned right into Luke's ears, ignoring the stiffness in his pants. Right now, everything was for Luke. All his senses focused on Luke's wants and needs and he knew he'd never forget this moment even if wanted to. He placed his hands onto Lukes thighs and rubbed them softly, only making things worse for the pretty boy on his lap.

"Mikey." Luke moaned out, gripping lightly onto Michael's shirt as he let out shaky breaths. 

"What's wrong baby?" Michael asked pecking Luke below his ears. He chuckled at how the younger boy shivered under his touch.

Michael started to rub himself against Luke, teasing his boy and Luke let out ragged breaths. He could feel his body tingle with pleasure.

"You're beautiful." Michael whispered. 

Despite the blush on his cheeks, Luke was even more aroused. The blond had forgotten about the rose he'd left neglected besides Michael and the fairy lights on the trees and the stars shining above him. 

All he could think about was Michael.

The older boy had stopped moving but Luke didn't want him to, he had been deprived of intimacy like this, Luke hadn't felt this good in ages and he couldn't stop himself from rubbing against Michael's thigh letting out little moans.

Michael was only getting more harder by the sight, he wanted to take Luke right now and love him, love him so goddamn much. He wanted to show Luke how good he could make him feel. Let him know what he had been missing but today wasn't the day- so he smiled at Luke, placing small kisses all over his face before sitting up and placing the blond beside him. 

Luke whined at the loss of contact but he knew it was needed and he let out a big breath willing himself to calm down. 

Michael was watching the boy curiously, a smirk tugging on his lips at how unsettled he was. 

"Princess liked that, didn't he?" He whispered into Luke's ear, taunting him with the nickname he had just found out Luke liked. Michael chuckled when he saw Luke's eyes widen, none of them missed the small whimper that escaped Luke's lips or the bright pink flush that coated his cheeks. 

The older boy placed his hand on Luke's thigh, yet again rubbing it slowly. His voice was low and hot as he whispered in Luke's ear, kissing it lightly, "We should go back now. For your last surprise."


	58. Slow Dancing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More soft muke <33

Luke was eager to see the last surprise Michael had set up for him. There was no tension in the car, despite their little moment earlier. Michael and Luke were holding onto each other's hands again. Luke couldn't be more happy. 

As soon as he saw the familiar house, he couldn't stop the excited smile grow on his lips. His leg bounced up and down anxiously; Michael could feel the excitement Luke felt and he couldn't wait to take him inside. 

Michael parked the car, locking the doors and then reached out to hold Luke's hands. He placed a quick kiss on his temple before unlocking the door with his key and stepping inside. They were surrounded by darkness and when Luke reached out to turn the lights on Michael stopped him.

"I want it like this." He said quietly.

Their hands were still connected and Michael took small steps towards his living room, not worried about walking into the walls. He had lived here long enough. 

Just as the pair reached the main room Michael let go of Luke's hand causing him to worry. 

"Mikey? Why'd you let go?" He asked quietly, feeling around for the older boy. Michael sensed his discomfort and turned around, easily making out his figure in the dark. 

"It's okay Angel, I just need to fix everything quickly. Do you mind waiting for me? I'll only be a few minutes."

Luke wasn't sure how he felt but then he felt Michael place a soft kiss on the corner of his mouth whispering to him that he'll be okay and he couldn't stop himself from agreeing. 

The younger boy stood out in the hallway, leaning against the wall, waiting for his date patiently. He could hear slight shuffling and Michael curse once or twice which made him giggle. 

And then the door opened, letting the soft light from inside the room leak out onto the hallway. Luke walked into the room, eyes wide at the transformation. The couches had been pushed along to the side and there were candles burning in every corner of the room. Luke's record player (the one Michael had bought) was placed on the table with a record playing and Luke's eyebrows furrowed in concentration. He knew this song.

The blond boy hadn't realised that Michael had walked up to him until he felt arms wrap around his waist from behind. Michael's breath was hot on his neck and Luke tensed when Michael placed an innocent kiss there. 

"What are you thinking about?" He whispered and Luke sighed. 

"This song, I think I know it." 

Michael smiled softly, "You do. I asked Ashton for help and he told me all the songs you used to sing with your mum."

Luke's eyes widened in realisation, that's where they were from. His eyes watered and Michael was unaware as he was still holding Luke from behind. 

"I haven't heard them in ages." Luke whispered as Michael trailed his lips down Luke's neck. 

"You don't mind it?" He asked curiously and Luke shook his head, turning around and hugging Michael tightly. His face fit into the crook of Michael's neck and he let one or two tears escape, as he clinged to his green eyed boy.

"Thank you for making this date so special."

Michael chuckled softly, "Thank you for giving me a chance Luke."

He pulled away wiping Luke's tears, "Stop crying Angel, today was supposed to a happy day."

Luke nodded remembering Michael's words and he sniffed, "Yeah, you're right."

***

Michael had a small smile on his face as he stepped back and bowed to Luke. "So, may I have this dance?" He asked politely offering his hand and Luke giggled at the sight. This was too much for him and he just felt like crying again and calling his best friend over to tell him how amazing Michael was and how happy he made him. 

"I'm not the best." Luke admitted with pink cheeks and Michael shook his head smiling. 

"Oh please, you dance so well." Michael teased and Luke flushed at his praise.

Michael reached for Luke's hands and wrapped them around his neck before he stepped in closer gripping onto Luke's hips delicately. The music was slow and romantic and Luke felt like he was in a fairytale as he followed Michael's steps.

As they moved around the room, they had taken smaller steps closer and closer to each other and now they leaned against each other's forehead smiling non-stop.

"I love your eyes Mikey." Luke said shyly, "they're so pretty and shiny and I like the way I feel when I look at them."

Michael's smile only grew wider as they carried on slow dancing, "How do they make you feel?"

"You, make me feel at home." Luke whispered. "You always make me feel safe Mikey. The things you've made me feel in these past few weeks, I've never felt in years. Thank you for making me feel like me again."

"That's all I ever wanted." Michael whispered.

The song finished playing and soon another one came on. A beautiful song that Luke remembered listening to as he and his mum made cookies or did the laundry. He was so grateful for Michael because now he was remembering all the little memories he had made with the woman he had loved so dearly. 

He didn't want to dance anymore, he just wanted to be held by the boy he was starting to love so he rested his head on Michael's chest, arms lowering to wrap around his waist as he closed his eyes contently.

"You okay Angel?" Michael asked softly and Luke hummed, too tired to speak. He liked the peace in the house, with the music in the background acting as a mind relief.

Michael kissed Luke's hair, the smile on his lips never fading away. Now that he had the chance, he never stopped finding ways to kiss the boy. He just loved it so much. He loved Luke so much.

He knew the younger boy had fallen asleep due to the soft, perfectly timed breaths he let out so Michael took this time to whisper in his ear how much he loved him.


	59. The Past

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has smut. I hope it was okay.

The two boys were outside in the cold. It had been raining all morning and now the ground was muddy. Luke's beat up converses stood carefully on the thick mud as he followed the harsh footsteps of Michael's boots. The wind crackled and blew Luke's curls everywhere whilst Michael's blue storm remained hidden under his hat.

It was a gloomy day, the sky a murky grey like the diluted ink Michael sometimes saw in his water pot whilst he painted. He had been here a number of times and each time it was a blur. His visits were random and inconstant, he just spent his time sitting on the cold, hard bench drowning in his thoughts. But now, Luke's fingers were locked with his, grounding him to reality. 

Michael was hot and nervous but Luke’s touch was comforting. 

He gulped hard at the sight and stopped, letting Luke reach up to him before dropping their fingers. He instantly regretted it, Luke's touch was reassuring and Michael wished he had pulled the boy closer instead. 

The blond was quiet as he stepped closer to the stone, he crouched down, his fingers hovering to trace the lettering. Luke looked up at Michael as if asking for permission before touching Michael's mums gravestone.

"Maybe we could buy some flowers for her?" Luke whispered, "I think she'll like that."

Michael only nodded, hands in his pockets as if he didn't care but Luke knew the boy did. He had a huge heart that he kept hidden away with the dark colours he wore.

Slowly, Luke got up and stood beside Michael, their shoulders touching and the younger smiled softly. "Thank you for bringing me here Mikey."

"I'm sorry. I didn't know where to find your mum, Ashton had no clue where to find her either." Michael said, ignoring his dead mum's grave.

Luke's heart fluttered, at the mention of his late mum but also because Michael remembered and he turned to hug the boy tightly. "That's okay, I don't think I want to see her now anyway. I'm too scared."

Michael, like always, hadn't hesitated to hold the boy tightly and he let himself breathe in Luke's scent instantly feeling better with the familiar smell of his shampoo.

"Let's go from here." Michael whispered and Luke nodded, knowing that the older boy needed a piece of mind.

***

Michael and Luke were sat on the couch watching a film. Luke seemed a thousand miles away and Michael nudged his thigh, pulling him out of his thoughts. 

"What's wrong Angel?"

Luke shook his head exhaling, "I just- I have a lot to think about. There's too much going on."

His voice was small and timid and Michael extended out his arms letting a shy Luke climb into them. They were wrapped around each and Michael allowed himself to rub circles onto Luke's back.

"Don't trouble yourself. Things will keep moving along and you'll be okay. You'll have found yourself."

Luke nodded, listening to his reassuring words and he let a little smile. He really loved Michael, he did. He loved how he cared, and how he always showed affection. He loved how he never judged or got angry when Luke was sad. Luke didn't like bruises or crying. It always left a sore ache in his heart and chest. He was so glad he found Michael.

Luke's fingers traced little shapes absentmindedly on Michael's shoulders and he heard Michael hum, "What're you thinking about baby?" He whispered making Luke blush, his stomach doing flips at the name. 

He gulped and pulled back to look at Michael, his green eyes were warm and showed a lot of love in them. Luke hoped it was for him.

He felt as if time had stopped as he gazed at Michael and his pink lips and before he knew it he was leaning in. Their lips grazed each other's and Michael groaned as he pulled away. He took his time studying Luke making sure the boy wanted this before reconnecting their lips and this time Luke found himself giving his everything into their kiss. 

It was sweet and their was a lot of passion shared between the two. Michael's hands finding their way to Luke's hips, his fingers grazing the bare skin accidentally, making the younger whimper. Luke moved in closer, wrapping his arms around Michael's neck and intertwining his fingers in the blue sea of his hair. Michael was driving Luke crazy as he nibbled on his plump lips before tracing it with his tongue and then he pulled away watching Luke's chest heave for air. 

Luke's lips were a stark red and his blue eyes shiny like tropical oceans and Michael felt the urge to lean down and make pretty little marks on Luke's pale skin. 

He peppered kisses all down Luke's neck, sucking at the soft skin, "Are you okay?" He rasped and Luke nodded his head eagerly. His eyes were shut tightly as Michael continued with his attack on Luke's neck. 

"Oh god Mikey." Luke whimpered out, his head thrown back as Michael's hands explored his small body. Michael felt the stirring in his lower body at Luke's little sounds and he didn’t want to stop himself, he wouldn’t.

Michael placed Luke down onto the couch before hovering over him. The blond was overwhelmed with the feelings that had erupted and he didn't want them to stop, he found himself truly enjoying the touch of someone else. He was eager for more but he still was so shy and hesitant.

Michael noticed his nervousness and leaned forward tucking a loose strand of his hair away, "What's wrong Angel? Do you want me to stop?" He asked and Luke shook his head no, a light pink coating his cheeks. 

"Don't be shy." Michael whispered fondly before pressing a soft kiss on Luke's lips and the boy turned red. He looked deep into Michael's eyes and placed his arms around Michael's neck playing with his hair. Luke lay there fascinated, with so many feelings in his heart. Michael was incredible.

He pulled the older boy down, kissing him with everything he had and Michael kissed just as hard. The thrill and ecstasy he got from Luke's lips would never change and he knew that. "Fuck Angel, you're perfect."

The blond blushed a pretty shade of pink and Michael grinned, deciding to take things further. He thrusted his hips forward, allowing his erection to rub against Luke and the younger let out a moan, his eyes rolling to the back of his head. Luke's hands went to Michael's hips trying desperately to pull him back down and Michael gave in, letting his Angel enjoy the pleasure as he grinded against Luke with more pressure. 

"Is this alright?" Michael breathed, "Should I carry on?" Luke nodded eagerly and Michael chuckled, pecking his lips, "Talk to me Angel, I need to know things are okay." 

Michael didn’t want to rush Luke or make him feel like he was being forced into this. The blue haired boy was sure the younger did indeed want this but having his consent would make it clear and safe. He didn’t want to hurt the boy he loved.

Luke gasped and opened his eyes looking straight into green ones, "Yes please." He whimpered, "Carry on Mikey, I-I need this."

Michael groaned at that and let himself love the boy. And Luke was a mess; moans and whimpers spilling out of his lips. His eyes were screwed shut and his skin was sweaty as he whined for Michael to keep going. And Michael really enjoyed seeing his Angel become such a wreck.

He stopped thrusting his hips and Luke whined, opening his eyes, he had pink cheeks and red lips and looked so beautiful under Michael, "Mikey please." he whimpered, "don't stop."

Luke's cheeks were in flames as he asked for Michael to carry on, he knew how naughty this was but the ache and longing in his pants was too extreme and the pleasure he was getting was so good. He couldn't wait for Michael to carry on so he began grinding against Michael's thighs letting out little moans at the friction he was creating for himself. 

His pink lips were in a little circle as he moaned and whimpered and Michael's thoughts went haywire. He spread Luke's clothed legs apart in an instance making him whine desperately. "Princess, that's what I'm here for." Michael said. His voice deep; only making Luke more unsettled. 

Michael tugged the loose material of Luke's shirt down and kissed harshly onto his collarbones making Luke shiver. The boy was sensitive there and truthfully, Michael loved giving him love bites. He loved seeing the harsh reds and purple on his beautiful pale skin.

His hands trailed down Luke's body near his crotch and the boy whimpered for his touch. "Mikey.."

"Relax Princess, I'll make you feel good, yeah?"

Michael pecked Luke's lips lovingly before his palms ghosted over Luke's erection causing him to groan and thrust himself into Michael's hold. Michael loved watching Luke become so undone. His other hand began stroking Luke's hair lovingly. "You okay baby?" He asked and Luke nodded , opening his eyes and looking at Michael, "Yes."

Michael smiled. "I'll make you feel so good princess." He promised.

Michael’s hands worked wonders: Luke was a moaning mess. Michael had watched his boy come undone. He had whispered for Luke to keep his eyes open and that was possibly the best thing he had asked for his entire life. Luke’s blue eyes were shiny as they followed all of Michael’s actions, his hands gripped onto Michael tightly, toes curling in pleasure as he cried Michael’s name.

And Michael wasn’t even ashamed to say that he had came from a few touches and from the sight of the most beautiful boy in the world.

The pair lay close to each other, regaining their breaths and when Michael had collected himself he placed soft kisses all over his face. Luke giggled quietly, the blush on his cheeks was faint but still there and he looked up at Michael, blue eyes brimming with love. Michael loved him so much.


	60. Reassurance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is the last, don’t worry, there’ll be an epilogue! :)

Luke had been huddled in bed all night, wide awake and teary-eyed. He had just had several visions of Alex touching him and then it suddenly felt real. He was crying and begging for it to stop and then he saw Michael, with dark eyes glaring at the two. Luke felt so relieved but then Michael started speaking, cruel words leaving his mouth and Luke only found himself breaking more.

He was right all along. No one would want someone like Luke; someone who's been tainted and scarred. Luke was disgusting and didn't deserve love, he could've done so much to stop it but he didn't. It was all his fault. 

His blue eyes snapped open. The blond sniffed quietly and slipped out of bed making sure Michael wouldn't hear him leave the room. No matter how many times he'd clean his cheeks, a fresh set of tears only stained them again. He was sure his eyes were red and raw because they were stinging hard. Luke just wanted Michael to reassure him and tell him that he's still beautiful and that he still loves him but after that nightmare; Luke wasn't sure he'd say that anymore. 

***

Michael rushed out of his car and trailed up the pathway knocking on Ashton's door. This was the first time the emerald eyed boy had been to Ashton's house but he wasn't focused on looking around right now.

"Luke?" He called desperately and then banged into someone. Michael stepped back, to see his best friend had opened the door. He let out a sigh of relief, "Cal, where's Luke?"

Calum yawned and rubbed his eyes sleepily, "He's upstairs in Ashton's room. Came here crying and has been for the rest of the night. Wait, is it morning?" 

Michael nodded, "Nearly six."

"Fuck, I'm so tired. Maybe you can talk to him? He wouldn't listen to us, he just kept on crying."

Michael could see the sadness in his best friend's eyes and pulled him in for a hug. The smaller boy slipped his arms around his best friend with a small smile, "You're a good person Michael." Calum said before pulling away, with a smile still on his lips, "Go look after Luke, second room on the right."

Michael nodded quickly before trekking up the stairs, he opened the second door on the right and peered around. Where was Luke?

He heard the small sniffles and closed the door gently sighing.

"Angel? It's only me, where are you?" He called softly.

Michael looked around the neat room the only thing messy was the unmade bed and the sweater on the floor. He walked carefully around the room picking up the sweater and placing it on the chair in the corner before calling out for Luke again. 

Then, Michael noticed the small steps at the back of the room, he climbed up and saw a window and some pillows scattered around. There were fairy lights hung on one side of the wall and the blond boy leaned against the other. His curls a mess and his eyes closed. Michael awed at the sight and climbed up before sitting down.

This part of the room seemed like such a Luke place and Michael shook his head smiling at how cute that sounded. 

Luke still hadn't noticed Michael's presence.

"Angel?" He hummed and Luke's eyes fluttered open. Michael could see how red and sore they really were and felt a tug on his heartstrings. The blond sniffed and pulled his knees in holding them tighter.

"H-how did you f-find me?" Luke whispered. He looked down, feeling embarrassed and Michael guessed it was from his stutter. "Ashton called me." 

Luke nodded simply and looked out of the window. It was quiet as Michael thought about what he wanted to ask Luke.

"Mikey, what if you leave me?" Luke whispered finally revealing his thoughts. Blue eyes met green as Luke waited for an answer to his question. It had been bothering him for a while. He felt so clingy and pathetic but Luke needed the reassurance and he was so sure he had got it when Michael had pulled him over. His hands on Luke's hips and his forehead against Luke's own.

Whatever light that shone through the windows hit Michael's green eyes making them so light and pretty, his pale skin looked beautiful with the long fringe of his blue hair and Luke breathed out in wonder as he gazed at the boy. Their noses were grazing in short Eskimo kisses and Michael's breath was hot on his lips. Luke was freaking out about how close this beauty was, all he could hear was his own voice hoping that Michael would say that he's here forever.

"You're eyes say so much." Michael whispered and Luke immediately looked down flushing.

"Look at me Lul." Michael whispered, "Please?"

And just like that, Luke was staring back at those green eyes. He could feel Michael strip each layer of his sadness and insecurities and he felt so exposed. 

"Why are you so scared? I really like you Luke, I like you quite a fucking lot and I don't think I'll ever be able to walk away from someone like you." His hands went to rest on Luke's pink cheeks stroking them softly as he sighed. 

"And I'm stupid, stupid for falling for someone like you, when I'm someone like me. You're perfect, a whole angel sent from heaven. And I'm a monster, a monster that has been more dead than alive. I still can't believe that you're letting me be here with you and letting me have a chance because that's way more than I thought I'd ever have with you."

Luke's heart felt light in his chest. Like this big weight had been taken away, leaving him to rest in the soft hold of Michael's hands. He felt his eyes water and he sniffed; he hated how emotional he was. 

"I'm not going anywhere Luke."

The blond peered back up at Michael to see he still had his eyes on him, he had been watching this whole time. Luke sniffed and leaned into Michael's hands. He could feel the boy come in closer and he closed his eyes, the tears dancing down his cheeks.

Their kiss was soft and sweet, full of promises of love. Michael's hand still caressing Luke's cheeks as his other wrapped around Luke's waist letting Luke know he was serious. He pulled away leaning on Luke's head; his lips ghosting Luke's, "You're my world Luke, when I'm with you I can breathe again." 

Luke broke into a small smile his cheeks only getting more pink with Michael's never ending words and he leaned down placing a soft kiss on Michael's lips. 

"You saved me.”


	61. Boyfriend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end! If you’re still here then thank you so much! This was the first ever book I’ve wrote and I’m proud of it and I’m so happy that you’ve enjoyed it with me. Next chapter is the epilogue!

Michael and Luke spent the rest of the day at Ashton's, just lazing around and messing with his drum kit. Calum wanted to learn the drums and got immensely jealous (but also excited) when he found out Luke could play them a bit. After some encouragement and Michael's small head kisses, he played a song for Calum. Ashton and Calum watched their friend proudly; leaving Michael to obsess over how talented Luke was and how hot he looked.

Finally, they arrived home. Michael put in a film and grabbed a blanket, some popcorn and Luke, before sitting down on the couch. Luke sat beside the older boy, pressed into his side but that wasn't enough so Michael pulled the blond onto his lap; a little shriek left his lips. 

"Mikey." He whined but Michael didn't care as he leaned forward humming into Luke's neck. "I want you as close to me as possible." He murmured.

Luke got flustered by Michael's comment and didn't reply and the older knew he had affected the boy. He leaned back against the couch, wrapping his arms tightly around Luke’s waist and pulling him down waiting for him to get comfortable before playing the film. 

***

The pair were nice and warm snuggled under the blanket. They were halfway through their third film and Michael pressed a small kiss onto Luke's neck.

Luke didn't bother hiding his smile as Michael pressed more loving kisses on his shoulder. His fingers were running up and down Luke's thigh and knee just feeling the soft skin and reassuring himself that the blond was there with him. 

Luke felt around for Michael's hands before intertwining their fingers. The two were so loved up and happy they weren't even paying attention to the film on the TV. Michael reached over and turned it off, letting out a sigh.

The younger placed their conjoined hands on his stomach, fidgeting with both their hands. Michael just smiled into the darkness.

"Luke, can I ask you something?"

Luke only hummed, too busy remembering each line and indent of the green eyed boys hands. 

It was quiet for some time as Michael thought of a better way to word this. He had been waiting for the right time for ages but it never felt real enough but now he knew the time had come. Sitting here with Luke lying on his chest, playing with his fingers and unknowingly making him smile was probably one of the best moments they'd spent together.

"Mikey," Luke whispered, "what did you want to ask me?"

He leaned back, placing his head into the crook of Michael’s neck. The older boy let out a huge breath. 

"Will you be my boyfriend?"

Luke's eyes widened at the question. He hadn't expected Michael to ask him that, he was stunned. He felt Michael's body stiffen underneath him so he turned around to meet eyes with the older boy. His eyes held disappointment and he tried to avoid Luke gaze already thinking he knew Luke's answer.

Luke looked down at their conjoined hands thinking about how perfect they looked together and how he wouldn't mind being seen holding Michael's hand in public. They fit perfectly like puzzles and Luke was suddenly busy thinking about how these hands wiped his tears and fought for him against Alex and how beautifully they made art.

He felt a drifting sensation in his stomach like there was an ocean in there. If love came in waves, tonight Luke would be drowning but he couldn't care, Michael would always save him.

"I'd love to." He replied, voice delicate like the Angel Michael viewed him as and the older boy broke out into a grin at Luke's response.

"You what- really?" 

And Luke could only nod before he was being kissed by his boyfriend. He could feel the intense love Michael held and Luke smiled as he wrapped his arms around Michael's neck.

Michael pulled back giving him one last kiss on his pretty pink lips. He brushed Luke's hair back happily.

"I can't believe I'm yours and you're mine." He whispered.

"Get used to it Mikey." Luke giggled and Michael's smile only widened as he kissed his boyfriend again. 

Boyfriend. God he loved that.

***

It was nearly five in the morning and instead of being in bed, the couple were huddled in their sweaters sitting cross legged in a field full of daisies. 

Neither were tired and thus found them self in the car- just driving with no sense of direction.

Luke's fingers fumbled with the pale flowers whilst Michael's were in his pockets. They were sat opposite each other and Michael just gazed at his boyfriend; paying attention to what he was saying. Michael would never get over calling him that.

"When I was younger, my mum taught me how to make daisy chains. They were so pretty and colourful." Luke spoke, "We spent every evening in the summer, sitting outside and making chains." Luke said with a faint smile. 

Once he had finished, he beamed at his work and looked up blushing slightly when seeing Michael was already staring. He handed one of the crowns to Michael, "For you." 

Michael smiled adoringly at the small chain of flowers. Luke had already placed his own one on top of his curls; Michael knew what he was going to draw next. The lilac hoodie Luke had on with the white flowers on his golden curls looked adorable and Michael found he couldn't stop himself from smiling. 

"You look gorgeous." 

He pulled out his phone and took a picture of Luke, the younger had a smile on his face his cheeks pink and eyes bright and Michael also knew that he would never stop falling in love with him.

"Put yours on Mikey." Luke insisted and Michael chuckled. "Alright Princess."

Of course he smirked when seeing the fire in Luke's cheeks at the nickname.

"How do I look?" He asked his boyfriend and Luke was back to beaming. 

"Mikey you look so cute! It looks so pretty on your blue hair."

Once again Michael pulled his phone out, "Take a selfie with me."

The two smiled into the camera before doing a silly one with Michael's eyes and nose scrunched up and Luke sticking his tongue out. They did one last one and Michael blushed when Luke turned to kiss his cheeks. He looked back at the photos and could see the happiness in his own eyes.

Luke was his whole word.

End


	62. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s over :( Check out my other works if you want :)

The green eyed, bleached blond haired boy sat there happily in his dark clothes. His feet were tapping anxiously on the ground as he thought about his lover.

God, how Michael loved Luke.

They had been together for nearly three years and those three years had been the best. Michael didn't know how, but everyday there was something new to learn. Something new to love. Everything about Luke was just perfect and he couldn't and wouldn't ever stop himself from tumbling down Luke's rabbit hole. 

They had grown together and grown stronger and Michael couldn't be happier.

"Mikey?"

The pale skinned boy turned around and like always, his eyes glowed and his lips broke out into a soft smile at the sight of the golden haired boy he loved.

Luke had a small smile on his face, his curly hair had since been getting curlier and Michael was obsessed with it. It was messily placed, curls tumbling everywhere. His blue eyes were lazily admiring Michael's appearance and Michael could feel his heart beat increasing- like he was a schoolboy. 

"Hi Angel." He greeted, extending his hands and Luke wasted no time walking into them. Michael held him close, placing a small kiss on his head and running a hand down Luke's back with a sigh.

"How was your day?"

"It was good. I planted some more flowers."

Michael pulled back grinning, Luke was still in love with flowers like he was years ago and Michael found it adorable. He loved buying the younger boy flowers and seeds to plant. Seeing the excitement and joy build up in his eyes as he looked after them was everything. 

"Bet they're pretty just like you."

Luke giggled softly and Michael smiled, pushing a stray curl back to its place in Luke's wild hair. 

"My little wildflower." He hummed and Luke giggled again. 

The younger slipped his hands gently into Michael's, tugging at them slightly indicating he wanted to go and Michael nodded, bringing their intertwined hands up to place a light kiss on Luke's knuckles. His fingernails were coated in pale yellow, chipping at the corners and Michael smiled to himself knowing his Angel would soon ask him to help paint them.

***

Luke was so glad he had taken all those little steps to his happiness. Starting with letting Michael in and allowing him to slowly infiltrate his life with his bright coloured hair and dazzling eyes. He was so thankful that now three years later he still had Michael in his life. 

He closed his eyes contently, snuggling into Michael's side further. He remembered the night in the park where they kissed under the lamp post. He told Michael his most hidden secret and he was so glad he did. It had taken some time but they had gone to the police and complained about all those times Luke had been violated and now they're we're living happily. Freely. 

Luke's blue eyes fluttered open and he sat up turning to look at his husband. Michael was beautiful. Luke loved every single one of Michael's hairstyles especially the red one but his current bleached blond, overgrown hair would always be Luke's favourite. 

Carefully, Luke placed his thigh over and straddled his husband. Michael's hands instantly holding Luke's hips. His fingers were warm where they grazed Luke's skin but the ring he wore was cold and Luke shivered slightly as he leaned in. 

The two spent their time looking at each other. Just admiring one another for some time before Luke's lips stretched into a huge smile and he blushed deeply, looking away. 

He felt around for Michael's hands and held them like he always did when he was nervous. He studied Michael's ring and then his own smiling slightly to himself because they were promises. Being Michael's husband was the best feeling in the whole world. Having Michael's heart and letting his own be cared for by the older man was something he'd never take for granted. Luke always wanted to let Michael know how much he loved him. He was still obsessed with him like he was years prior, when he had blue hair. God, Luke couldn't ever thank Michael enough for knocking on his door that day with Calum and introducing himself.

"What are you thinking about Angel?"

"Nothing really." Luke mumbled. "Just happy." He confessed.

Luke looked back up and leaned in, kissing Michael. Their lips moved together just touching and tasting and enjoying the moment of love they shared.

***

It wasn't night. It was dusk, meaning the huge window behind Luke revealed the sky which was painted in a variety of pastel hues. 

But Michael still thought that Luke was the most prettiest thing to look at.

"I love you so much." He said quietly and Luke hummed.

"I love you more."

"Nope."

"Yep." Luke said giggling and Michael lovingly watched him as he flicked the blue eyed boys nose. 

"I don't think so baby."

Soon, the two boys had flipped positions and Luke was under Michael on their bed. His hands went straight away to wrap around Michael's neck as Michael balanced himself. 

"I love you." Luke whispered happily and Michael leaned down placing soft kisses on Luke's neck. Luke hummed in content as his lover sucked on his skin, trailing upwards whilst leaving small marks that he knew both himself and Luke liked looking at.

"I know you do baby, love you more." Michael whispered before nipping at the skin under Luke's ear causing him to giggle. 

"Mikey." He cried and Michael chuckled into Luke's neck only making the boy under him squirm more. 

He trailed his hands down to Luke's waist and lightly tickled him and Luke burst out into giggles as he tried to move away. "Stop it Mikey!"

"Can't help it baby, not when you sound like that." 

Luke blushed deeply, like Michael knew he would, so he looked up, staring at Luke's gorgeous face. 

"So pretty and adorable." Michael mumbled pressing more kisses to Luke's neck. 

The younger boy whined and Michael looked up, only to be pulled in closer. Their lips grazed and Luke looked deeply into Michael's eyes.

He pulled Michael even closer and bit his lip whilst glancing down at his husband's lips. Luke kissed Michael lightly, letting his lips linger before moving them to his jaw. 

The older boy tilted his head allowing Luke to do what he want and the blond did. He rolled them over so he was on top and brought Michael's hands to his hips as he kissed his collarbones. Michael closed his eyes in bliss as Luke slowly started to roll his hips. 

The younger boy gently caressed Michael's face, fingertips tracing his pink lips. The man in front of him was gorgeous and all his.

Michael's eyelids fluttered open revealing his green orbs. They were dark and Luke could see the lust and desire in them, he loved feeling wanted and Michael always made him feel like that.

Smiling innocently, Luke sat up, intentionally applying slight pressure on Michael's crotch. Luke loved teasing him.

"Ash and Cal are coming for dinner. We've got to get up."

He got off of his husband and heard him groan loudly, the younger blond blushed.

"You little tease."

Luke shrugged innocently as if he didn't know what he had done and Michael shook his head chuckling to himself as he watched his husband walk out of their room.

He followed Luke down into the hallway and pulled him by his waist, trapping Luke’s body between the wall. Michael placed a hand on Luke's lower back and eyed him down, "Shouldn't play games Angel, not when you know you won't win." 

Michael studied Luke's face for a second, loving how his blue eyes darkened at the words he had just spoken and how he only bit down harder on his lips. God, Michael was obsessed with his boys lips and his body. He wanted to love Luke and spend every minute reminding him just how much he loved him. 

Michael leaned down kissing him with a passion and the younger instantly wrapped his hands around Michael pulling him close and they both sighed into the kiss. Michael was a bit rougher as he nipped and bit Luke's lower lip making him groan.

The older boy had pushed his lovers body onto the wall, moving closer until each inch of their bodies were touching and Luke whimpered as he tugged at Michael's hair. Michael only kissed him harder. Luke was his drug and Michael could never get enough of him.

"Ash and Cal are gonna be here soon." The older whispered tauntingly against Luke's lips before going to his neck to suck bigger bruises onto his pale skin. 

Luke moaned, he always loved when Michael left marks on him so he leaned his head against the wall revealing his neck and letting Michael do whatever he pleased with him.

"I don't care." He breathed out heavily and Michael smirked only biting and sucking harder. Luke gasped pulling Michael in unbelievably closer, craving his touch and he whimpered at the contact. Michael slowly bucked his hips against Luke's, letting the boy feel how much he affected him earlier.

Michael loved his short gasps; long moans and how his Angel had a tight grip on his shirt.

"You cared before, Princess." Michael whispered pulling away and Luke groaned loudly, looking into Michael's eyes.

"Not anymore." He rushed before pulling Michael back to kiss him but Michael stopped him. He had a huge smirk on his face once seeing how needy Luke was and how he whined for Michael's attention. "Please Mikey, please." He whimpered and it took everything in Michael to not push him against the wall and ruin him right there.

"Maybe after they're gone and you've been a good boy I'll carry this on." He whispered hotly and Luke whined trying to pull Michael right against him and Michael gave in. He grinded against Luke, revelling in his needy moans. Luke was never quiet in bed and Michael adored that, he loved hearing how good he could make his husband feel. 

He pinned Luke's hands above his head, rolling his hips with more force and Luke's eyes were hazy as he stared at his husband. Moans and whimpers spilled out of his lips and the bulge in his pants was prominent.

Michael let out a breathy groan admiring how undone he had made his boy. Luke's lips were red and plump like cherries and the love bites scattered on his neck and collarbones revealed what they had been up to and Michael found it hard to keep away from him but he did.

"Sorry babe, they'll be here soon."

Michael pressed a soft kiss to Luke's cheek and let his husband rest against his chest, they had been so busy the last few weeks, not having enough time for each other, he must have been so overwhelmed and needy and Michael hated that he couldn't give Luke what he wanted. He promised himself to make it extra special for Luke tonight.

Michael smiled fondly and whispered into his husband's ear, "I love you Angel."

Slowly, Luke looked up, his lips stretching into a smile but he was still slightly out of it. Michael rubbed his back and pecked his lips. "You okay baby?"

The blond nodded and placed his head in his husband's neck, "I love you too Mikey, always and forever."


End file.
